Those two vampires didn’t get much lead time on their 30-day hush-a-thon. E! News reports Nikki Reed gave birth July 25th to her and Ian Somerholder’s baby. All I can think, is that it came out with vamp fangs and a tongue ring (like she had in Thirteen). Nikki put Gwyneth Paltrow to shame in the “say whaaaa?” department in that interview with Fit Pregnancy, where she said the baby’s first 30 days would be spent “fully present” with just the three of them without phones or visitors. Continue reading
Did your parents ever make you play the game How Long Can You Go Without Saying A Word? My mom used to pull that shit on me all the time when I was a kid. I was terrible at it and never lasted more than one minute.
Hopefully Nikki Reed and Ian Somerhalder are better at it than I was, because part of their birth plan includes 30 days of silence once their baby is born. It’s one of the myriad woo-woo pregnancy tidbits Nikki revealed in a recent Fit Pregnancy interview.
Ian Somerhalder and his wife of two years Nikki Reed both announced on their own Instagrams today that she’s pregnant with a baby that will probably be born with a permanent 5 o’clock shadow like their dad. Both Ian and Nikki posted that picture of him smelling her baby dome area while she works some kind of LDS birthing gown. Or maybe that’s what Nikki ended up with when she tried to recreate Jennifer Lopez’s Met Gala dress using old hospital gowns.
I’m surprised there’s not a fat billow of steam rising up off of them. Isn’t that what happens when an extra hot human flat iron touches an ice cube?
Last night, something that happens every single night happened: awards were handed out to country stars. All of the oxygen on this planet will be sucked out into the universe and vengeance will come if a day goes by where a country music star doesn’t thank the lord for the trophy in their hand. So last night, the CMT Music Awards went down at the Bridgestone Arena in Nashville. Since they’re at every country music awards show, the frozen porcelain vase and the fresh-outta-the-kiln ceramic pot in a Suze Orman wig were at the CMT Music Awards last night.
Nicole Kidman looked stunning in matador pants, a rich old lady’s lunchin’ shoes, a face by DuPont and a fur-trimmed top that was a gaudy toddler dress in a past life. I don’t know if it’s the makeup or lighting or what (“It’s the ‘what.'” – you), but the Botox Baroness looks like she strolled into her plastic surgeon’s office and pondered between the Madame brand cheek cutlets and the Phoebe Price brand cheek cutlets before going with the latter. But on a more important note, I need to know which brand of SPF: Infinity And Beyond Nicole uses, because I burn easily and it’s amazing that she doesn’t get even a little bit tan while standing next to that humanized UV ray.
Here’s more pictures from the CMT Music Awards including a couple of Billy Ray Cyrus outdoing Keith Urban in the flat iron game.
You’d think that any Ian Somerhalder fan who is devoted and crazy enough to stand outside of his hotel in Paris would know that May 28th is International Ian Somerhalder Day and on that day, Ian Somerhalder does not take selfies or sign autographs, thankyouverymuch.
Yesterday in Paris, Ian and his partner in cheese Nikki Reed walked out of their hotel and straight into a group of fans who wanted a picture with him. Since it was May 28th and his day, Ian Somerhalder dramatically let his fans know in an impassioned speech that he would not be posing with them. If you’re fluent in side-eye reading, then you can clearly see the guy in the black suit and t-shirt saying, “Um, you know you could just take a quick picture with them in the time it’s taking you to give this long ass speech,” with his side-eye
That crying girl… It’s just Ian Somerhalder! It’s not like it’s a legendary Ian like Ian Ziering or anything.
I, for one, love Ian’s anti-Norma Desmond “I am NOT ready for my close-up, Mr. DeMille” monologue. With a few changes, it’s the perfect speech to say in many situations. The next time a bill collector calls you, say to them, “You guys, I am not taking a single call from a bill collector today. It is MY day. Don’t call me, please. I love you. You’re so awesome.” Make sure you grab and shake your left titty when you say “MY” so they can really feel the emotion through the phone.
But seriously, if Ian really wanted those fans to leave him alone, he should’ve just said to them, “Hi, everyone, I’m not Zac Efron.” They would’ve said, “Oh shit,” before shuffling away.
When vampire actress Nikki Reed and vampire actor Ian Somerhalder pressed the fast forward button on their relationship by making it legal last month, I was shocked beyond shocked that their first order of business wasn’t to run to UsWeekly or InTouch or the Glendale NOW! free weekly shopper and hustle their wedding photos for a check with a couple zeros at the end. Instead, Nikki held tight until yesterday when she released a highlight reel of their wedding to Instagram. Warning: high-levels of whimsical soft-focus romance ahead.