Category: Hot Slut of the Day

Hot Slut Of The Day!

September 25, 2018 / Posted by:

Because some of you are freaks with fucked-up fetishes, I got a few requests to make Gritty, the new mascot for the Philadelphia Flyers (that’s hockey), a HSOTD. I mean, I’m all for having a fucked-up fetish, but getting moist in the tip over an off-brand Animal from The Muppets whose been banned from nearly every grocery store in Philadelphia for stealing bags of beef jerky for their silica gel packets to make his drug of choice out of?!!! Although, he is a ginger, so I sort of get it, you nasty tramps!

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Hot Slut Of The Day!

September 24, 2018 / Posted by:

The two-headed snake of Virginia!

Stephanie Myers of Woodbridge, Virginia was in her yard two Sundays ago when she noticed a two-headed snake slithering around her neighbor’s flowerbed. Normally when you’d hear about a two-headed snake slithering around, you’d think, “I didn’t know Trump was doing a rally in Woodbridge and I didn’t know Jared was joining him,” or, “Oh, Pimp Mama Kris is just hunting for new souls to sacrifice to her maker Satan while in her true form, that’s all!” But this was an actual snake.

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Hot Slut Of The Day!

September 23, 2018 / Posted by:

This weekend’s HSOTD theme IS legendary raccoons! Yesterday, I paid tribute to a Canadian DGAF grand champion who committed three crimes (breaking and entering, thieving of carbs, and knocking tricks over by being a devastating badass) and would gladly do it again. And today, I pay tribute to a raccoon who easily won America’s Got Talent without even being on America’s Got Talent. This raccoon must somehow be related to the MPRaccoon of Minnesota, who scaled a 25-story building, because this one is also a scaling wonder, but the raccoon also made people gasp until their lungs collapsed by pulling some acrobatic shit.

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Hot Slut Of The Day!

September 22, 2018 / Posted by:

Again, here at Dlisted, we do not condone or endorse blatant thievery, but we do endorse (or I do anyway) foolery produced by raccoons (Exhibit: A, B, C, etc…), and quite fucking frankly, I condone blatant thievery by a criminal ball of fur who only gives a fuck about getting some deliciousness in the robber bag they call a stomach (Exhibit: A, B, etc…). That leads me to today’s HSOTD who proves that not all Canadians are polite and well-mannered creatures who are perfect houseguests. This one’s a straight-up rude bitch and makes zero apologies for it. My idol!

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Hot Slut Of The Day!

September 21, 2018 / Posted by:

Terry Lauerman, a wonderful human being!

If you’re a cat lover, get ready to throw your panties at the screen, because this is your dream man. Meet Terry Lauerman, a 75-year-old cat shelter volunteer who goes to the Safe Haven Pet Sanctuary in Green Bay, Wisconsin every day to cuddle and nap with the rescue cats. And you’re probably not going to be able to read the rest of this post, because you threw your panties at your computer and they stuck to the screen.

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Hot Slut Of The Day!

September 20, 2018 / Posted by:

Dramatic Ass Minivan Bear!

If you didn’t at all look at that picture and only looked at the words, then congratulations, you’re one of the rare freaks who only reads the words in a post instead of only looking at the picture and moving on. But if you’re one of those rare freaks, then you probably thought to yourself, “John Travolta drives a minivan?!” But today’s HSOTD is an actual bear.

Nicole Minkin Lissenden of North Carolina writes in the description of the YouTube video that a bear got into her family’s minivan, and after she figured out that a wild intruder had broken in, she ran off. ¬†The bear was trapped inside and the minivan’s automatic doors failed to work at a time when they should really work, so her husband ran to unlock it. As Nicole recorded, her husband unlocked the door, thinking that I don’t know, the bear would suddenly learn how to open up a mini-fucking-van and stroll right out. That didn’t happen.

A bear opened the door to our unlocked van. I unwittingly closed him in, then went back a while later to retrieve something from the car, I realized a bear was inside. After the automatic doors failed to open, my husband had to unlock it with the key. The bear found another way out. We’re alive – our van, not so much!

Here’s the video, and yes, I salute that bear!

I salute that bear, because bitch knows how to make a dramatic exit. Sure that bear could’ve suddenly learned how to open a minivan door and slid on out like a normal, but who wants to be normal when you can be an extra motherfucker? Now THAT is an exit!

Pic: YouTube

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