Category: High Times
Open Post: Hosted By Leslie Jordan Celebrating 4/20
Today is April 20, AKA 4/20, AKA smoke ’em if you got ’em! Last night Leslie Jordan took to Instagram to share his views on “International Pot Day.” 66-year-old Leslie claims he doesn’t actually smoke pot, because it makes him socially awkward: “I don’t even know what to do with my arms or my hands.” But our beloved Hot Slut of 2020 still took the time to bless us with the tale of his first time smoking weed.
Open Post: Hosted By The Time Billy Crystal Got High Before His MRI
Earlier this week Billy Crystal (seen above with stoner eyes provided by Photoshop and me) went on The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon and shared a talk-show-anecdote about how he recently got super-high for an MRI. I’ll take Horrible Ideas for $1000, Blossom! 73-year-old Billy explains to Jimmy that the saga began when he fucked up his right hip while exercising. He went to the doctor, who informed him they needed to do an MRI to investigate. This made Billy anxious cuz he’s very claustrophobic, so while he was alone in the hospital, he popped four edible gummies. Why so many? Well, the guy at the cannabis store (Billyshopped in the senior’s section) told him that two edibles would make him feel “good,” and Billy replied, “I really want to feel fabulous!”
Martha Stewart’s Getting Into The Weed Business
Martha Stewart’s manufactured friendship with Snoop Dogg has really been paying dividends. We already know this jailbird isn’t afraid to act on a hot tip from a friend if it’ll cover her cashmere budget for the year. So it should come as no surprise that Martha’s about to fuck with the Canadian cannabis company that distributes Snoop’s “Leafs by Snoop” line of weed for her own brand of CBD products.
Pete Davidson Was Pulled Over And His Passenger Was Busted For Pot Possession
If you were to ask me which 2018 personality was most likely to get busted for possession of pot, I would answer Pete Davidson. But I’d be wrong! According to TMZ, Pete was pulled over very early this morning for suspicion of looking like a sentient edible, but it was his passenger, fellow comedian Joey Gay, who was actually busted. Turns out Pete’s a fucking professional and was able to pass a field sobriety test.
TMZ reports:
Sources with direct knowledge tell TMZ … Pete and his friend were driving in Syracuse around 4 AM last weekend where Pete was filming “Big Time Adolescence” with Machine Gun Kelly. It’s unclear why, but cops ordered him on the side of the road. We’re told officers smelled weed … triggering a search.
I too smell weed whenever I see a picture of Pete. It’s kind of a pavlovian response. His fabled wang probably emits bong water flavored jizz. People claims that Joey was carrying edibles and was charged with “possession of a controlled substance in the fourth degree” and cited with “unlawful possession of marijuana”. I guess New York State does not fuck around. TMZ says that fourth degree controlled substance charge is a felony.
Pete probably crammed all his edibles down his throat as soon as he saw the blue lights flashing. Not even a seasoned patrolman can tell the difference between “toxically stoned” Pete Davidson”, and “I’m a very sober and responsible driver, officer” Pete Davidson. Whatever happened in that car, Pete owes his pal Joey a big thanks for taking the charges. Imagine if word got out that Pete was a user of marijuana? His career would be over, and I’m sure Ariana Grande would have to think twice before marrying a possible felon!
Pic: Instagram