Everyone panicked last month when it was announced that HGTV was about to drop its Waco rudder. Chip and Joanna Gaines said they were packing the shiplap into a U-Haul and driving off into the sunset to “catch our breath” at whatever goody-goody camp those two preach at in the off-season. But it appears that breath will be more than caught if someone comes along promising to add a few zeros to the Gaines’ joint checking account. Continue reading
Spin cycle classes, UGG stores and Starbucks all across middle America will be emptier than Chip Gaines’ head today, because all basic moms will be at home blasting a Sam Smith song from their Spotify playlist as hot tears fly out of their ducts as they clutch the giant clock they bought on sale at Magnolia Market. Because the King and Queen of Waco, Chip and Joanna Gaines, announced today that the fifth season of their extremely popular HGTV show, Fixer Upper, will be its last.
Ken and Kelly Downs are blaming Magnolia Reality, the company owned by HGTV’s Fixer Uppers stars Chip and Joanna Gaines, for tricking them into purchasing a home in a really shitty Waco, Texas neighborhood. How shitty you ask? Well for one thing, a drunk driver somehow managed to give Bo and Luke Duke a run for their money and do some serious damage to their home, nicknamed The Three Little Pigs House.
As one HGTV couple’s marriage crumbles into a pile of dusty plaster and wood lath, the foundation for another HGTV marriage has just been poured. People magazine has announced that last night, Property Brothers Drew Scott, aka the business in the front to Jonathan’s party in the back, got engaged to his girlfriend of six years Linda Phan.
Another Fixer Upper scandal was born the other day when Buzzfeed’s Kate Aurthur wrote a piece about how the show’s stars, Chip and Joanna Gaines, belong to an evangelical megachurch that is 100% against same-sex marriage. I would’ve been surprised if the evangelical megachurch they belong to wasn’t against same-sex marriage. There’s been many gay and lesbian couples on other HGTV shows, but none have been on Fixer Upper. So Kate wondered if Chip and Joanna co-sign their church’s beliefs. A gay Christian writer called Buzzfeed’s article a “hit piece” in an op-ed for The Washington Post and others called it a “witch hunt” and a non-story.
HGTV said in a statement that they don’t discriminate against LGBT couples on any of their shows. And the pastor of Chip and Joanna’s church, Antioch Community Church, claims that they don’t hate the LGBT community and they’re “open” to showing support. Meanwhile, this drama has caused Chip and Joanna’s HGTV arch rivals (in my head) and alleged scammers, Tarek and Christina El Moussa of Flip or Flop, to cackle loudly before fighting over whether the wood floors in their newest flip should be grey or grey.
Because I just love some good ole’ HGTV drama (I am still waiting for a scandal involving that annoying Flip Or Flop couple), here’s a story about how that Fixer Upper couple hates seeing their work on home rental sites more than they hate wood that hasn’t been tastefully distressed. The Waco Tribune says that at least six houses in Waco, TX that Chip and Joanna Gaines renovated on Fixer Upper are available for you to rent nightly on sites like Airbnb and VRBO. Chip and Joanna don’t like that, and it seems like future contracts with homeowners will have a “NO RENTING IT OUT OR ELSE” clause in it. Sorry, tricks, but only Chip and Joanna are allowed to make $$$$ from their show, thankyouverymuch.