Category: Heather Graham

Scarlett Johansson Introduced Everyone To Her “Husband” At The Gotham Awards Last Night

December 2, 2014 / Posted by:

Awww, it’s always a special relationship moment when you go from “secret husband” to “not-so-secret husband”. Take it all in, Romaine Dauriac! Last night, Scarlett Johansson attended the Gotham Independent Film Awards in NYC, and she brought her brand-new no-longer-secret secret fancy French husband Romaine Lettuce. People says that for the first time since they got secret hitched, ScarJo was introducing him as her “my husband”, as opposed to “the French dude who barebacked a bébé into me”, which is what I assume she used to introduce him as.

In case you’re anything like me (don’t ever admit that out loud, for your sake), I’m sure you’ve been dyyying to know more about ScarJo and Romaine Lettuce’s secret wedding. Thankfully, ScarJo hangs around with some Level-8 blabbermouths who have been spilling the details. According to People, ScarJo and Lettuce tied the knot on October 1st in Philipsburg, Montana. I don’t know anything about Philipsburg, but from what I can tell on Google Maps, it’s about a 2 hour drive to the closest Taco Bell (and really, that’s all I need to know).

But back to the Gotham Awards. ScarJo was nominated for Best Actress for Under the Skin, but lost out to Julianne Moore for Still Alice. Other winners included Original Recipe Batman Michael Keaton for Birdman, and Tilda Swinton, who got some kind of lifetime alien human tribute award for being Tilda Swinton, I guess.

Here’s more of ScarJo at the Gothies working some greasy teenage dirtbag boy hair, for some reason, as well as Jon Hamm looking foiiiiine as hell (“DUH!” screamed everyone with a working pair of eyes), Jakey G, and Uma Thurman looking like a fancy upper-class witch:

Pics: Splash

Zach Galifianakis Brought The Lady He Saved From Homelessness To The Hangover III Premiere Last Night

May 21, 2013 / Posted by:

I’m taking a short break from our regularly scheduled program of foolery and fuckery to bring you a sweet story that proves that there are some nice people who do good things in the world. I know, this is my second nice story of the day and if I keep at it, I’ll totally have to change this site’s name from Dlisted to D’awwwlisted.

The New York Daily News (via UsWeekly) says that before Zach Galianakfifisksisnis was a multi-millionaire movie star, he did his laundry at Fox Laundry in Los Angeles and that’s where he met Elizabeth “Mimi” Haist who volunteered there for tips. Elizabeth pretty much only survived on tips from customers and jumped from friend’s house to friend’s house, because she didn’t have a place of her own. Zach and Mimi kept in touch, and years later when his checking account balance started to see more zeros, he got her an apartment in Santa Monica and he pays her rent and utilities every month.

Somehow Renee Zellweger got involved and decorated Mimi’s apartment. Squinty also buys Mimi’s groceries.

Zach didn’t just set Mimi up in an apartment like a kept memaw and stop calling her. Zach calls Mimi to see how she’s doing and always invites her to his premieres. Mimi has gone to several premieres and for the longest time nobody knew who she was. Some figured she was Zach’s grandma and others figured she was his side piece (Zach wishes). 87-year-old Mimi was Zach’s date to last night’s premiere of The Hangover III and before the premiere, she said this:

“I’m looking forward to it, I like the excitement of it. If he’s in town, he takes me. Otherwise he lets me take a friend. I dress up nice and a friend helps me with my makeup. It’s fun, not something I’ve ever dreamed I’d experience.

Afterwards, they have a party at somewhere close by and you meet the stars. I drink lemon drop martinis with Grey Goose vodka.”

Zach Galikadsjflkadsjfklasdfi has a glorious beard of ginger lushness, so I would’ve before reading this, but now after finding out that he’s a memaw helper, I really, really would. And somebody please strap all the Kardashians to chairs and read them Mimi’s story from the New York Daily News. The thought of being selfless and generous will make all of their heads combust.

Here’s a few pictures from last night’s premiere. In order after Zach: a greasy vision in copper (who totally asked Mimi to be his next beard), Ed Helms, Jamie from The Real World: San Diego, Heather Graham, Justin Bartha, Santana from Glee, Ken Jeong and Hanson.

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