As everyone knows, tonight’s Golden Globes red carpet (wait, why isn’t the carpet wearing black too? Traitor ass!) is all about standing in solidarity against the Harvey Weinsteins of the world. The question “Who are you wearing?” was a bad phrase tonight and if a trick dared to ask it, they’d probably get pummeled with stones on the spot.
The entertainment reporter robots at E! had to be reprogrammed to stay away from “fluff” and ask more serious questions, like about Time’s Up. So when Debra Messing strolled up to Giuliana Rancic’s mic, she talked about why nearly everyone was wearing black, and then she dragged the network that Giuliana works for by shaking her head over the Catt Sadler situation. Catt Sadler left E! News because her bosses refused to pay her as much as co-host Jason Kennedy, who made double. Debra got into the gender wage gap issue and took that opportunity to spit on Giuliana’s mic (I wish she did for real) about Catt Sadler.
“We want diversity, we want intersectional gender parity, we want equal pay. I was so shocked to hear that E! doesn’t believe in paying their female co-hosts the same as their male co-hosts. I mean, I miss Catt Sadler. We stand with her and that’s something that can change tomorrow. We want people to start having this conversation that women are just as valuable as men.”
Giuliana pretty much said shit and you could practically see the tangled up macrame plant hanger she called a ponytail shake with nervousness over how to respond.
Debra Messing drags E! (while being interviewed on E!): "I was so shocked to hear that E! doesn't believing in paying their female co-hosts the same as their male co-hosts" pic.twitter.com/HF3B2uhwtF
— David Mack (@davidmackau) January 7, 2018
Now if only Debra slid over to Ryan’s mic and brought up the rumored sexual harassment allegation against him. I really want to see the smoke blow out of the animatronic leprechaun’s ears right before he malfunctions and shuts down.
Even though Fashion Police has survived in some form or fashion after Joan Rivers’ passing in 2014, it hasn’t really felt the same since none of the remaining cast knows how to tell a good dry pussy joke. The execs at E! must long for those days because they’ve decided to cancel the show and send it off with a farewell next month. Continue reading
While watching E!’s awkward and messy red carpet coverage, I nearly put my bong away, because I got secondhand high, drunk and whatever from Matt LeBlanc. (But then I quickly clenched my bong like it was 9″ dick, because I remembered that I still had more Giuliana Rancid interviews to get through.)
The generic brand Ryan Seacrest (which is saying a lot since Ryan Seacrest is the generic brand Ryan Seacrest) called Jason Kennedy asked Matt LeBlanc some stupid questions on the Emmy red carpet and Joey Tribbiani was the opposite of thrilled to be there. But when Jason mentioned that Emilia Clarke, who plays that dragon chick on Game of Thrones, was with Giuliana at that very moment, he got a body boner and perked up. Emilia fangirled over Matt when they were on The Graham Norton Show together a few months ago.
Jason asked Matt if he watches GoT, and he went full creepy uncle when he said that he watched it the first season and stopped, but needs to catch up, because “that’s when she started getting naked.” I could practically hear his tip get moist when he said that. Matt IS that gross uncle who tells you that you’re really filling out and always tries to peck you on the mouth.
— Hollywood Reporter (@THR) September 18, 2016
Emilia laughed it off and said, “I’ve watched Friends. I don’t remember him getting naked, though.”
I blame Ryan Seacrest’s Sunday night understudy for this! If Jason Kennedy never asked Matt LeBlanc about GoT, I would not have the image of him going home tonight to watch GoT while fucking a dragon Fleshlight, and you know he’ll keep his Ray-Bans on. Damn you, SeacrestBot 2.0.
And here’s Emilia looking like a fancy condom and Giuliana looking like Miss Havisham’s mothball-covered curtains at the Emmys tonight.
Pics: Wenn.com, Getty
Having to stand and talk to Giuliana Rancic on that hot-as-fuck Emmy red carpet last night sounds like the epitome of HELL to me, so I’m genuinely shocked that most famous types didn’t pull an “I don’t know her” as they hauled ass indoors and started humping the nearest AC vent. Thankfully some people, like American Horror Story’s Sarah Paulson, thought ahead and brought their own shade.
Sarah stopped and talked to Clippy’s sister, and the heat truly removes all fucks from one’s system, because their interview was just one giant “No, bitch” moment. Shortly after Giuliana reminded everyone that Sarah has been nominated – and lost – four times, she asked Sarah (who was nominated for playing conjoined twins Bette and Dot on AHS: Freak Show) if she’ll get two Emmy awards if she wins. Rather than look at her in the face and low-whisper “Are you serious?“, Sarah gifted us with this beautiful soul hug:
Sarah Paulson with an outstanding subtweet of Giuliana Rancic. pic.twitter.com/45KEpgPwH3
— Dave Itzkoff (@ditzkoff) September 20, 2015
Did anyone think to check Giuliana for frostbite, because that was ice cold. “No, sorry sweetie” PLUS that voice? Even shade queen Jessica Lange is slow-clapping for that one. Of course, Sarah didn’t win (Regina King did instead), but she took home an even better award: Outstanding Achievement in Making Shit Awkward with Giuliana Rancic. “Welcome to the club!” hollered Elisabeth Moss.
Here’s more of the Luke to Jessica Lange’s Yoda, as well as Giuliana in some low-budget JLo cosplay on the red carpet last night.
Zendaya’s cable provider can probably expect to hear the words “Yes, I’d like to renew my subscription to the E! channel” at some point today, because it looks like she’ll no longer have to worry about seeing her arch nemesis Giuliana Rancic pop up between commercial breaks of KUWTK like a malnourished Whac-A-Mole.
Giuliana released a statement last night confirming that she has decided to pack up her stuff from the E! News desk (a bottle of negative-calorie water and several sticks of sugarfree air) and mosey on out. However, she’s not turning in her E! staff ID card just yet; Giuliana says she’s sticking around for Fashion Police and will continue to annoy celebrities during E! Live From The Red Carpet shows.
“For more than a decade, I was fortunate enough to play a role in the success of E! News and will miss my family at the show. At the same time, I am excited to not only continue as host of two major franchises on E! but also executive produce the aspirational new show Rich in Faith for Oxygen as well as take my wine and clothing lines to the next level. This is such a thrilling time for me and I thank the gang at E! for understanding my desire to embark on this next chapter in my life.”
E! added to Giuliana’s so long, farewell statement by saying: “During her time here, Giuliana played an instrumental role in building E! News into a global entertainment news powerhouse and, while we will miss seeing her on set every day, we are delighted to continue to work with her on Fashion Police and Live From the Red Carpet.”
There’s no word on whether or not Giuliana’s old job is up for grabs, but I’m sure that hasn’t stopped every hard-up famous-ish person from salivating over this news while they print out their resumes. Raise your hand if you too pictured Kelly Osbourne, NeNe Leakes, and Khloe Kardashian sprinting Amazing Race-style to the E! offices this morning.
Even after both Kelly Osbourne and Kathy Griffin strapped on life vests and jumped from the sinking ship called the S.S. Fashion Police, E! decided against burying the show with Joan Rivers and decided to bring it back. E! announced today that Fashion Police will come back on August 31st and when it does, Joan’s daughter Melissa Rivers will be sitting in the head bitch chair next to Brad Goreski and elongated ant Giuliana Rancic.
The Hollywood Reporter says that E! will squirt out 6 new episodes and Melissa Rivers will continue to be executive producer. It looks like the format isn’t going to change that much. Melissa, Brad and Giuliana will be regulars and they’ll talk shit with celebrity guests. What I mean by “celebrity guest” is an extra from #Rich Kids of Beverly Hills if they’re lucky. Melissa will also carry a taser which she’ll use on Giuliana if Giuliana says anything even mildly offensive. So basically Melissa will use that taser when Giuliana says, “Hello, I am Giuliana Rancic.”
Even though E! said that Fashion Police was going to come back after Kathy left, I didn’t really think it would come back. I figured that E! would realize that since it didn’t work with Kathy, maybe it won’t work with anybody not named Joan Rivers. But well, I guess Melissa hosting Fashion Police is better than E! “retooling” the entire thing and turning it into a show where the Kartrashians do nothing but rate all of Caitlyn Jenner’s looks of the week. That will probably happen on September 1st.