Category: Fashion

The Billboard Music Awards Fashions Put The “Bored” In Billboard

May 21, 2018 / Posted by:

The Billboard Music Awards were last night and if the red carpet is any indication, it lived up to it’s name because most stars looked as bored as can be. With very few exceptions, most of the night’s looks were uninspired and devoid of whimsy. Nick Jonas (above) looks like he just showed up for his shift at Applebees and still needs to go get his flair from his locker and take a quick shot at the bar before getting started. He’ll be with you in a minute, ok?

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Scarlett Johansson Showed Up To The The Met Gala In Marchesa

May 8, 2018 / Posted by:

Before Harvey Weinstein was officially outed as the closest DNA relative to a bridge troll, it seemed as though every red carpet had at least one star in a Marchesa dress. Marchesa  is co-owned by Harvey’s now-estranged wife Georgina Chapman. Then the stories about Harvey went public, and A-list actresses were running away from Marchesa as if it was a deep-fried gluten sandwich. Nobody wanted to wear Marchesa anymore. Well, nobody until Scarlett Johansson, who did just that at the Met Gala.

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The TIME 100 Gala Brought Out Some Influential Looks

April 25, 2018 / Posted by:

The 2018 TIME 100 Gala was held last night in New York City to celebrate Time magazine’s annual list of the 100 most influential people. And whether the people were influential or not, the red carpet fashion pulled from a variety of sources. Like Leslie Jones in Christian Siriano, who is giving you Grace Jones after stopping at Studio 54 while thinking,”I wonder what the rent is on this place? Do they pay monthly or yearly? You know what, hand me my coke spoon and purse, I’m leaving to pursue a career in commercial real estate.

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Now For The Drama, Glamour, And WTF-ery Of The Oscars Red Carpet

March 5, 2018 / Posted by:

Note that I left out the word “mess,” as there’s no question that the messiest part of the red carpet was most likely the three square feet of space occupied by Ryan Seacrest.

If there was an award for red carpet fashion that makes you question a stylist’s sanity, Nicole Kidman would be that category’s Meryl Streep. Nicole arrived in an Armani Prive gown that does double duty. From the waist-up she’s very mascot of a sexy frozen fish company, and from the waist down I’m getting a reminder to please separate my  plastic recyclables from my paper.

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Justin Bieber Might Be Starting His Own Fashion House

February 23, 2018 / Posted by:

For the past seven months, Justin Bieber has been on a self-imposed time off from his tour. He’s been keeping “busy” with one-on-one private bible studies with Pastor BFF and couples counseling with Selena Gomez. But like many bored famous people before him, it would appear Justin has decided to really commit to killing time by starting a clothing line.

The Blast says that Justin’s company, Bieber Time Holdings LLC, filed documents last week to secure trademarks on the phrases “The House of Drew,” “La Maison Drew,” and simply “Drew.” All three trademark applications list the intended use for goods and services, which the trademark states could be apparel such as shirts, jeans, jackets, pajamas, swimsuits, robes, bras, and children’s clothes. Oooh, OshKosh better watch out, it sounds like Justin Bieber is pulling his Big Wheel up to their turf.

TMZ notes that this is the third time Justin has tried to trademark “Drew.” Drew is Justin’s middle name. Justin filed applications in 2012 and 2015, but eventually abandoned both applications.

There’s no other information about Justin’s alleged clothing line, like when it might be happening. But it’s great that he’s making his own clothing; I’m sure it will be adopted as the official uniform of his cult…I mean, church. And I’m being totally serious here when I say I’m excited to see Justin Bieber’s clothing line. Justin Bieber is operating under a level of hubris-jacked delusion on par with Kanye West, and look at what he’s sent down the runway. At best it will be boring. At worst? I don’t know – I’m picturing a suit made out of Justin’s favorite hockey jerseys and quick-removal shirts.



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