You know when Tim Gunn used to warn Project Runway contestants about making sure their looks don’t go too costumey? It always turned out to be pretty solid advice, and contestants who didn’t heed his warnings were usually sent home. I always imagined those losing designers slipped quietly away to careers in the circus or on the drag circuit. But judging from the runway at last night’s Billboard Music Awards in Las Vegas, some of them went on to have lucrative careers making costumes for remakes of popular movies.
It’s been over 10 years since The Hurt Locker won the Academy Award for Best Picture. That means it’s ripe for a remake. In this version, Mustard has the nerve wracking job of diffusing Mariah Carey’s Lush bath bombs. It’s a dangerous job, but Mustard’s just the man to do it. Look, he’s on the hair brush right now, getting dispatched to his next mission. They’ve found a Bom Perignon in Mimi’s toilet!
Lee Radziwell, socialite and younger sister of Jaqueline Kennedy Onassis, and the woman partly responsible for bringing the world Grey Gardens, passed away in New York on Friday from age-related causes. She was 85.
There was lots of glamour, color, and levity on display on the red carpet for last night’s Critics’ Choice Awards. And I’m going to go ahead and give all the credit to Judith Light. Judith set the tone, and everybody else did their level best to match her energy. There was probably a panicked buzz of “Judith Light, Judith Light, Judith Light” spreading among Hollywood stylists when they realized she was going to be there, forcing everyone to step up their game. Nobody quite got there, but they tried and that’s what counts. Ultimately, posing through Christian Siriano-made polka dots the size of dinner plates, Judith put all the kids on blast. If Judith wanted to be a real pal, she should have given a posing tutorial before the red carpet. Some people could really have used the help (see after the cut).
The first red carpet premiere of Aquaman happened yesterday in London. The first reviews of Aquaman have actually been pretty good, which is nice for DC Films and Warner Bros., because anything that helps people forget about the turd titled Justice League is no doubt much appreciated. Sadly that’s where the good reviews end, and the shady ones begin. And I’m of course talking about the couture swim cap Amber Heard wore to the premiere yesterday.
Do I need to write anything more? Simply seeing that Lindsay Lohan was present in attendance should be all the evidence you need that the MTV European Music Awards were a very high-end event. The MTV EMAs were held last night in Spain, and it’s got to be a big, important night if it’s able to drag Lindsay Lohan away from her various Greek beach clubs. But of course Lindsay was there. You can’t think of the word Europe without thinking of Lindsay Lohan. That’s because she’s tried on pretty much every accent found in Europe at one time or another. As for her dress, she looks like a Eurodisco groupie named Svetlana who can’t stay long, because she’s got to pick up her pet serval from DJ Lazer Anus (they share custody).
I’ve seen the original Suspiria from 1977 exactly one time, and now I’m officially scared of ballet, stained glass windows, loose piles of razor wire, and the prog-rock band Goblin. The remake starring Dakota Johnson comes out in theaters tomorrow, and the Los Angeles premiere was held last night in Hollywood. Luckily, the red carpet wasn’t nearly as terrifying as I was imagining it might be. Well, unless you count Dakota Johnson in a sequined second choice from the Dynasty wardrobe department as terrifying.