Category: Ellen Pompeo

Sofia Vergara Hustled Her Way To Being The Highest Paid TV Actress Of 2017

September 27, 2017 / Posted by:

Forbes has spoken and Sofia Vergara is still the reigning queen of getting those duckets! She’s been named the highest paid TV actress of 2017 proving once again, immigrants, they get the job done. This makes six years in a row that Sofia’s been the richest bitch in the TV game.

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Ellen Pompeo Was Criticized For Using Black Emojis

December 24, 2016 / Posted by:

A&E has a show about the Ku Klux Klan coming out. They had originally titled it Generation KKK (tasteful!), but that didn’t fly with the general public. So they changed the title to the rather “we’re really, really sorry for being jaunty about racism“-sounding Escaping the KKK: A Documentary Series Exposing Hate in America. Grey’s Anatomy actress Ellen Pompeo, whose husband is African-American, congratulated A&E for the name change in a tweet. She used some emojis that represented black people. It didn’t go so over well.

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That Taylor Swift Video That Stars Every Chick Alive Is Finally Out

May 17, 2015 / Posted by:

During the past couple of weeks or so, Taylor Swift has pussy burped up poster after poster after poster of all the “characters” in her video for her song Bad Blood (working title: Die Katy Perry Die). It felt like there were approximately 10,999 posters and I thought that I would die of old age before the last one was released. Well, she finally released them all and the video was finally shown at the beginning of the Billboard Music Awards tonight. Since everybody and their back-up dealer was in it, I figured it would be 2 and a half hours long, but it wasn’t. It was seven billion cameos shoved into a 4-minute long video. 98% of the women in it, don’t need to be in it, but I guess it’s Taylor Swift’s way of telling us that she’s really, really popular and a bunch of famous, famous-ish (and not really famous-ish at all) people will be in her video if she asks them.

This video is what would end up in the toilet if Brit Brit’s video for “Toxic” gorged itself on The Hunger Games and washed it down with a glass of Katy Perry’s tears mixed with Kill Bill before barfing. Taylor Swift plays some kind of spy who gets double-crossed by her fellow spy played by Selena Gomez. Tay Tay is about as threatening as a sedated ladybug in a tutu and her badass face look like “I’m constipated but trying to be sexy” Selena Gomez is slightly more threatening than a sedated ladybug in a tutu and she looks like she’s starring as Velma Kelly in a kindergarten production of Chicago. Behold:

If a 12-year-old girl with millions of dollars and access to a camera crew and a whole lot of leather catsuits made a fun video of her and her girlfriends playing “spies” during her slumber party, that is what that video would look like. With that being said, Cindy Crawford and Mariska Hargitay look hot.

Ellen Pompeo Thinks The Emmys Were Too White

September 24, 2013 / Posted by:

Ellen Pompeo became the premiere authority on racial diversity in award shows a couple of years ago when she said on The View that we don’t need the NAACP Awards anymore, because there shouldn’t be separation between races and every awards show should be THE PEOPLE’S!!! award show. Well, Ellen is coming after the Emmys now and she said in so many words that its name should be changed to the NAAWP (National Association for the Advancement of White People) Awards, because all she saw was a wave of singing and dancing white people. Ellen, whose daughter is biracial, told USA Today that this year’s Emmys was like some shit out of the 1950s (but isn’t the Emmys always like that?):

“I didn’t see any diversity in the Emmys at all. The Emmys felt so dated to me…. That dance number was embarrassing. Did you see one person of color in that dance number?”

Ellen went on to pat her own show on the back for being diverse:

“I’m extremely proud of our very, very diverse cast which represents the world that I walk around in every day.”

Ellen’s comment reminds me of when I went to see a touring production of Beauty and the Beast with a friend and during intermission she said, “Why is the only non-white person in the cast playing a fucking dancing rug?”

I drank like a Lohan on court day during the Emmys to get through that shit, so by the time the dance number came around, I was so tanked that all I saw were a bunch of blurry faces. It’s hard to make out skin color when everybody’s blurry. So I don’t know if Ellen is right, but I do know that she and Paula Deen have more in common than they thought. Paula Deen thinks the Emmys needed more dancing black people too!

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