Yesterday we learned that 2019 would be the first year in several decades in which Woody Allen won’t be releasing a film. According to Page Six, that honor might go to 2018 instead. His latest for Amazon, A Rainy Day in New York, was shot last September and October in New York on a budget of $25 million, and was reportedly scheduled for release later this year. No official date was set, it was more just a ballpark estimate depending on when Amazon Studios decided it should come out. Page Six seems to think that A Rainy Day will never see the light of day. They claim the movie has been “shelved” indefinitely.
When asked for comment, Amazon said: “No release date has ever been set for the film.”
It probably wouldn’t be too big of a shock if Amazon shelved it completely. Audiences might not want to watch Jude Law have sex with what he thinks is a 15-year-old girl. Or possibly the bigger elephant in the room, Woody himself. A few months after filming wrapped and #MeToo broke, several actors who have worked with Woody spoke out and vowed never to work again with the alleged creep. A Rainy Day stars Timothée Chalamet, Rebecca Hall, and Griffin Newman all donated their salaries to charity.
But maybe there’s nothing up, and Amazon just hasn’t picked a date. Or maybe Amazon has shelved it for the time being while they work with their marketing department and decide what kind of tagline should be on the poster for A Rainy Day in New York. Because “Even the actors in this film don’t want to be associated with this downpour of cringe” feels just a tad long.
Elle Fanning and actor/director Max Minghella might be a thing. Last year, Elle posted the above photo of the pair rocking matching sweatpants while filming Teen Spirit together back in August 2017, and this week People‘s got strong evidence of their alleged coupledom by way of a photo of Max wearing sweatpants while strolling with Elle around London.
Based on this sweatpants heavy photojournalism, we can deduce much, as there’s only a few reasons people should wear sweatpants out in public, such as taking out the rubbish and buying scratch tickets. So according to expert analysis, it looks like Elle and Max have already reached sweatpants levels of post-romantic status. Read what People has to say and you decide. Continue reading
There are Hollywood types who would get the dry heaves and hiss “hard pass” if their agents were to suggest working on a project with Woody Allen. And then there are others, who are like “What repeat allegations of repulsive pedo behavior? Sign me up!” The list is shockingly long, and it’s got a couple new names to add to it.
The Hollywood Reporter says that Selena Gomez has signed on to Woody Allen’s next project for Amazon Studios. She joins a cast that also includes Elle Fanning and Timothée Chalamet (from Call Me by Your Name). Nothing else about the film is known, like if Woody Allen scrapped the usual contract and asked Selena to agree to the film by signing his favorite issue of V Magazine instead.
Woody’s latest movie with Amazon Studios, Wonder Wheel (aka the movie starring Justin Timberlake and Kate Winslet), is set to premiere at the New York Film Festival in October. This next film will probably get underway after all of that.
Selena has said recently she can’t wait to be not famous. She picked the wrong project if privacy is what she’s after. You don’t exactly fly under the radar when you sign on to work with Hollywood’s creepy uncle. But I’m sure her publicist has already prepared for it. Like asking Kristen Stewart’s publicist for tips on navigating those awkward conversations about choosing to work with Woody. And maybe her publicist can hire a gag-suppression coach to help Selena through the awkward part of the press tour where Woody inevitably grosses everyone out by admitting he cast her after watching her on his second favorite Disney Channel show, Wizards of Waverly Place.
Every year, there’s always a giant chunk of celebrities at the Met Gala who completely wet fart on the theme and go with their own, which is usually: Rejected Dresses Leftover From Awards Season. Even Anna Wintour showed up to this year’s Met Gala in some dusty dress that Carol Channing definitely wore a million times better in the 1960s (see: Anna Wintour in the gallery below looking like a sad lamp from Liberace’s least favorite guest room). While watching the Vogue live feed of the Met Gala last night, some bland, I forgot who, said something about how she wanted to be comfortable. Bitch, if you want to be comfortable, stay at home in your sweats and t-shirt and watch the live feed while sitting on your futon like the rest of us do! You’re doing the Met Gala completely wrong if it doesn’t take six assistants, a registered nurse, a long plastic hose, a thing of KY and a janitor with a mop to help you piss.
But in last night’s sea of basic (see: the sea of basic in the gallery after the cut), there were a few bright spots of fuckery who actually paid attention in class when the theme was given. Enter: RiRi!
On last year’s cover of Vanity Fair’s Hollywood Issue were the likes of Jane Fonda, Viola Davis and Cate Blanchett looking like you at the DMV when the number in your hand says “198” and they just called number “10.” Their faces told a story and that story was, “I am bored but I also want to fuck a bitch up.” And for this year’s cover, Vanity Fair did what they’ve done a million times before: they gave us bored pretty youngins’ in $10,000 gowns.
No, that is not a screen shot of Ben Affleck making the face that his brother Casey Affleck made while jacking it to Vicki the Robot from Small Wonder. I don’t hate you that much.
Ben Affleck was on Jimmy Kimmel Live! last night to whore out his Prohibition turd, Live By Night, and during the interview he pretended to be highly offended over his brother Casey Affleck not thanking him at the Golden Globes on Sunday night. Ben got revenge on Casey for not giving thanks to the trick who made it all possible by burping up embarrassing facts about his brother. One of those embarrassing facts about Casey included him fapping while watching Small Wonder. I blame Casey Affleck for the reason why Jamie Lawson went on to live under a bridge.