Cleaning crews at The Beverly Hilton are probably still vacuuming up the shards of glitter that flew off of Billy Porter when he twirled in that amazing technicolor dreamcape, and are mopping up the Fiji water that people spewed out after realizing they were in the presence of the one and only Fiji Water Girl, and are disinfecting the floor after hundreds of people shit themselves as Baroness Jamie Lee Haden-Guest (seriously, she’s a baroness) sashayed onto the red carpet and they thought, “Damn, Brigitte Nielsen is looking hot after birthing out a baby!” People probably shit out everything in their system and are going to need some probiotics to get their guts good again. I see what you did there Queen of Activia!
There’s nothing a basic #woke white huss loves more than to say how Jordan Peele’s Get Out transformed cinema with its message of race relations and proving what I’ve thought for years: Allison Williams is one shifty bitch. Jordan has hinted he was working on a movie for a while now, and he finally dropped the trailer (co-starring the return of I Got 5 On It) for that movie – called Us – on Christmas. Thanks, Santa? In short, its message is to prove we’re our own worst enemy. Well, no shit, Sherlock.
That didn’t take long. It was only yesterday when MGM, the studio behind The Handmaid’s Tale, announced it would start hawking very on-brand merchandise for the show: wine! Y’know, because Gilead is all about the handmaids and barren wives tossing back a few at the country club and having a good ol’ laugh about living in oppression with a bunch of looney tune men with Napoleon complexes. Social media naturally lost its shit over the boozy attempts by a show that leaves us all feeling like shit each week and in need of a cocktail (hey, maybe they weren’t that far off the mark?). MGM has now decided to pull the cork, er, plug on the wine. Dammit, I was looking forward to Aunt Lydia two-buck chuck down at Trader Joe’s. Continue reading
(“Well, that’s rich coming from you, Erika Christensen!” –documentaries critical of Scientology)
Nothing puts a bee in the bonnet of a Scientologist like media reports that it’s a bit eccentric or documentaries shining a light on how members are often fleeced of life savings or how the Scientology bathhouse only gets cleaned every other hour. Y’know, typical religious critique. Erika went on Dax Shepard’s Armchair Expert podcast the other day to say she’s not here for anyone to mock her way of life unless you’ve read the full texts of L. Ron Hubbard. Continue reading
Jordan Peele’s creating a monster! Well, a juggernaut at least, that will probably smash box office records. Jordan’s not fucking around with his much anticipated follow up to Get Out. Jordan released some art work and a title for his next movie and, according to Variety, he’s in talks with two Black Panther faves, Lupita Nyong’o and thick legend Winston Duke to star. And if she can get out of her cult obligations, Elisabeth Moss as well.
If you’re tired of watching Elisabeth Moss wear that demonic red Oregon Trail get-up on Hulu, today must be a bad day for you. But it’s a good day for anyone who loves to feel depression sink into their bones while watching the show that could become our future. They’ve renewed The Handmaid’s Tale for a third season.
The Hollywood Reporter said Hulu announced the third turn in Gilead at an upfront presentation to ad buyers. Hulu doesn’t kiss and tell about ratings just like Netflix and Amazon, but they did say the second season premiered to twice the ratings seen on the first season.
The decision to renew Elisabeth Moss-starrer Handmaid’s Tale comes as no surprise. The series, which became the first at a streamer to win best drama at the Emmys, also took home a Golden Globe and prestigious Peabody Award. All told, the series based on Margaret Atwood’s best-selling novel of the same name has won more than 30 awards to date.
I couldn’t be happier if this means we can expect more awkward run-ins between Scientologist Elisabeth and Leah Remini. I hope Leah’s docu-series on Scientology keeps getting renewed like Handmaid’s Tale because watching those two evade each other is the only fun thing about awards shows. If we keep this up, instead of, “Who are ya wearing?”, Ryan Seacrest can ask the cast of Will & Grace and Roseanne at the Emmys “Who’s your money on for who can run to the bathroom the quickest when the other wins?!”