Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson hosted the Saturday Night Live season finale last night and announced he was running for president, as he threatened in GQ. He also brought out America’s Dad Tom Hanks and announced him as his running mate. I’m on board.
Right now, I’d stump for a facecloth, or a teacup poodle or an impacted molar for POTUS at this point. Literally, ANYTHING would be better than the “berzerker child” option with which America went. Check out The Rock’s monologue, below.
SNL also revisited their post-election cold open. This time, instead of Kate McKinnon covering Hillary Clinton covering Leonard Cohen, it was Alec Baldwin as Donald Trump and the rest of the cast as his administration and family (with a surprise cameo from Scarlett Johansson as Ivanka “Complicit” Trump). Here it is:
Wait, SNL’s done for the season? Where am I going to get my news? Will Anderson Cooper keep insulting the president’s lackeys on CNN? Can we get confirmation on that? That could be my sole news source now if he keeps being a shady lady to stupids.
Back in June, The Washington Post published a piece about how Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson could win if he ran for President of the United States. The Rock let it be known he was flattered and that the thought of being President was “alluring,” but that it was kind of a far-away idea. Well, the allure of laying the smack down in the White House is apparently growing for The Rock.
A lot of puffy pecs were reportedly in an uproar on the set of (I can barely type the awful name of this movie) The Fate Of The Furious last summer. The Rock vague-Instagrammed about someone being Public Asshole #1 on the set, and it was fairly obvious he was referencing fellow balding diva, Vin Diesel. Vin shot back by promising he would spill the tea on their roidy catfighting. That never really happened, but it doesn’t matter now, because it appears that both of them are past it.