“The hell?!?,” Meghan’s former dog Bogart barked angrily after hearing this news.
People reports that the pants-wearing attempted British Monarchy destroyer Duchess Meghan Markle and Prince Harry have adopted a dog. The pooch (whose name isn’t known yet – Prince Woofington?) is believed to be a Labrador, and they took him from a rescue shelter to riches earlier this summer.
The poor folks who live in their mansions along Lake Como likely just want to rest easy on the weekends, smoke some ciggs, fuck their lovers or spouses (or both!) and down carafes of red wine – y’know, the typical Italian pastimes. Alas, ever since George Clooney showed up years ago, it’s been nothing but Casamigos-branded shit and starfuckers galore – and that’s just when the Crawford-Gerbers show up! Well, now we can add Prince Hot Ginge and Duchess Meghan to the list of celebrities (fine…royalty…) who are invading the shores for the weekend.
What do you know, Thomas Markle is back at it, running his mouth off like his jaw has a lifetime warranty. Thomas recently took a break from dragging his daughter Duchess Meghan to rip on the Royal Family and compare them to a cult. And just think: it was barely four days ago when the Royal’s most recent worry about Mr. Markle was the thought of seeing one of their gardeners in a Thomas Markle original hoodie.
Duchess Meghan’s family is continuing their trend of being the absolute grossest by keeping their names in the tabloids for literally no reason other than making a dollar. Sorry, a pound: this is England, so that’s like $1.27, which is better… I guess. While the Meghan’s mom may be moving to England to be closer to her, Meghan is trying to get her father to catch a plane to Mars because he just will not STFU. Continue reading
Lost in all the “Thomas Markle still won’t shut up” articles is that Duchess Meghan has one seemingly normal parent. One that doesn’t appear to have a DNA mutation that causes them to wake up every morning and contact reporters. And as such, Duchess Meghan’s mom Doria Ragland is allowed to be in her daughter’s life and now she may really be in her daughter’s life, because the Express UK says she’s moving to London.
The nerve of that old drama queen! So many people have been waiting for a call from Prince Harry for decades now (step-mom Camilla the Duchess of Cornwall, his real dad James Hewitt, Michael K) and this bitch actually received that call and HUNG UP? (Can you guess which one of those aforementioned people sent Harry full-body boudoir shots of themselves with their phone number drunkenly scrawled across the ass?) Duchess Meghan Markle’s difficult dad Thomas Markle told The Daily Mail that he once hung up on Prince Harry during a phone call about his bullshit staged photo shoot prior to the royal wedding.