Category: Donald Trump Jr
ICU ICU Baby: Vanilla Ice (And Taylor Dayne And Terri Nunn) Performed At Mar-A-Lago’s Maskless NYE Party
If on New Year’s Eve, you really wanted to end your year with a BANG of foolery by catching coronavirus in the stupidest way possible, both coasts offered your ass something. In Malibu, CA, COVID-19’s favorite Christian Kirk Cameron once again ignored the state’s lockdown rules like relevancy has ignored him for decades and held another unpermitted prayer gathering where dozens of people, who mostly didn’t wear masks, listened to him spew out words that translated to, “I have found a new way for people to actually pay attention to me.” And over at Mar-A-Lago in Palm Beach, FL, hundreds of maskless messes danced to a Vanilla Ice performance during a pandemic. If in the future, your grandchildren ask you what the 2020 pandemic was like in America, just show them the clip of a maskless Donald Trump Jr. head-bopping to a performance of Ice Ice Baby by an accused wife beater.
Aubrey O’Day Claims That Ivanka Trump Is A Lesbian On The Shush And That Don Jr. Hates His Dad
During last night’s final presidential debate, alleged catfishing chameleon extraordinaire Aubrey O’Day dropped another October Surprise by spilling shit she claims she knows about all of Donald Trump’s kids, except for permanent children’s table resident and LGBQIIA ambassador Tiffany Trump. This may be the only time when Tiffany is happy to be the Lea Michele to everyone’s Jessica Lange. This was a bold and brave move on Aubrey’s part because it reminded everyone that she fucked Donald Trump, Jr. more than once. I mean, I thought that the reason for Aubrey’s multiple face changes on Instagram was due to her wanting people to forget that she’s the Aubrey O’Day who opened up her coochie for THAT. But I guess not…
This Is Why “#CocaineConvention” Is Trending
If you’ve ever doubted Donald Trump Jr.’s patriotism, look no further than last night’s virtual RNC for proof that he’s got AMERICA coursing through his veins. South America to be specific, possibly courtesy of Columbia’s most notorious export. With an assist from an utterly unhinged performance by his girlfriend Kimberly Guilfoyle, Don Jr.’s moist and glassy-eyed appearance at last night’s RNC prompted the hashtags #CocaineConvention, #CokeEyes, #CocaineDon and sundry other references to cocaine to trend. So yeah, maybe Don Jr. did a few rails before taking the stage— RAILS OF FREEDOM!
Donald Trump, Jr.’s Girlfriend And Trump Campaign Official, Kimberly Guilfoyle, Has Tested Positive For COVID-19
I know I know, you’re thinking “how could a family who once dismissed COVID-19 as not a thing, and then had to take it back because it’s such a fucking stupid thing to think let alone say aloud, and are still, four months in, trying to downplay its seriousness…how are so many people in and around that family still catching it?” Or maybe, like me, you’re trying not to think about them at all, despite seeing their faces every single day in the news.
Donald Trump Jr. Was On “The View” And It Went As Well As You’d Expect
Producers at The View didn’t read my comment card that their 5,000th episode should involve clearing the Tri-State area and inviting Rosie O’Donnell and Elisabeth Hasselbeck back to talk about, well, anything. Instead, they thought having Donald Trump Jr. and his girlfriend/Trump campaign adviser Kimberly Guilfoyle, would bring in better ratings. Or they just needed to find a new way to piss off Meghan McCain today that didn’t involve having Joy Behar talk about gun control. As you might expect, it was a disaster and maybe ABC should just count its blessings that The View studio is still standing.
Donald Trump Jr. Makes A Perplexing Case For His Dad Not Being Racist
When your dad is the President of The United States, even if you’re not smart, well-liked, or attractive, you’re gonna get a book deal. Just comes with the territory. Donald Trump Jr. is no exception. He has a new book out called Triggered and if you’re wondering if it’s any good, you’re probably suffering from a traumatic brain injury and should seek help immediately. I shouldn’t say that, it’s unfair. I haven’t read the book, I’m just racist against ignorami. Whether the ignorami can be considered a race is a subject of debate for a different time. But according to Vanity Fair, known ignoramus DTJ would have you believe that his dad Donald Trump can’t possibly be racist because he used to let his kids hang out and play video games with Michael Jackson.