So remember back in December when a cell phone exploded in CeeLo Green’s face and it turned out to be a big hoax to promote his new music project, Gnarly Davidson? We finally got to meet Gnarly Davidson in person during the Grammys. And just like his namesake, Gnarly is also loud, obnoxious, and looks like he stinks of chemical fumes. And yet, still more tolerable that the real CeeLo Green.
CeeLo wore a gold ensemble with some kind of comic book villain thing happening on his head. I’m sure the look he was going for was menacing and powerful, but he looks more like a knock-off Power Ranger toy from the dollar store. He also looks like what you’d get from a grandma who has never seen Star Wars after she offers to make your C3PO costume for Halloween. Of course the internet quickly took to roasting him on Twitter and turning him into a variety of memes.
Some of that gold spray paint must have reacted poorly with some butt crack sweat and caused a major chafe situation, because CeeLo Green didn’t stick around the Grammys for very long. It appears he hopped into one of Adam West’s old rides and went home.
CeeLo Green leaves the Grammys early because he didn't win anything 😫🤣🏆 pic.twitter.com/Nt4xfnacVq
— WORLDSTARHIPHOP (@WORLDSTAR) February 13, 2017
CeeLo didn’t win anything because he wasn’t actually nominated for a Grammy this year, so he wasn’t leaving early out of pettiness. Then again, I wouldn’t be surprised if CeeLo’s crazy ass thought he was nominated in every category. The final straw came after losing Best Country Solo Performance to Maren Morris, and he was like “That’s it, this shit is clearly rigged. Driver, go get the car.”
Here’s more of CeeNO STOP at the Grammys last night, as well as his debut as Gnarly Davidson at a pre-Grammy party on Saturday night.
Surprisingly, this situation doesn’t involve Kim Kardashian responding to yesterday’s news that Beyonce is pregnant with twins by speed-dialing TMZ and letting them know a “source” thinks she might be pregnant with triplets. This situation with Kim actually happened two days ago.
Olivia Munn has been seen with a ring on that finger, which can mean one of two things. She’s either engaged to Aaron Rodgers, or she had so much fun trolling Aaron’s family last week that she decided to do it again. No matter what the reason, I’m sure it has caused Aaron’s estranged family to collectively scream into pillows.
People says Aaron and Olivia were seen leaving a party in Beverly Hills over the weekend, and what do you know? She just so happened to be wearing an engagement-looking ring. Most people hold their steering wheel at ten-and-two, but Olivia made sure to get maximum exposure by keeping her left hand at attention o’clock.
— People Magazine (@people) January 30, 2017
This isn’t the first time Olivia and Aaron found themselves in the middle of an engagement rumor. Last year, Olivia shot down talk that they were engaged by posting a screenshot of a conversation with her confused mom to Instagram. Neither Olivia or Aaron has denied anything yet.
I’m inclined to believe that Olivia really is engaged to Aaron. For one thing, they’ve been together for almost three years, so it wouldn’t exactly be that strange for them to take their relationship into the legal end zone, so to speak. And really, if Olivia’s goal was to troll Aaron’s anti-Olivia family, she would have trolled way harder. Like calling up Neil Lane and requesting the exact same ring Aaron’s brother Jordan Rogers gave to JoJo Fletcher. And then immediately hopping on Instagram to act like it’s just a regular old ring that Aaron bought her. “It’s JoJo’s engagement ring from The Bachelorette? Oh, I had no idea. We had no interest in that season.”
Ariana Grande has a tour that’s starting next month. And what do you know? She just so happened to promote it this weekend with a couple pictures of her wearing a sparkly ring on that finger. Someone’s a graduate of Subtlety’s Finest School of PR Stunts.
If you have a cat, you may have been wondering why your pussy spent a piece of yesterday bowing down to the broomstick you keep in the corner in your kitchen. That was your cat’s way of paying homage to the American Cat Lady Queen and yodeling broomstick Taylor Swift on the 27th anniversary of her birth.
Taylor turned 27 yesterday and while her squad covered her with air kisses on social media (because they’re contractually obligated to) and companies like Rent-A-Famous-Boyfriend gave thanks to the existence of their most loyal client, her ex-piece John Mayer probably shit on her. And according to blind items, not in the way he usually likes to shit on a chick.
And one second after Jabba the Trump stuck out his finger to say, “I’m with stupider,” Kanye’s hungry, hungry booty hole latched onto that thing before completely swallowing up that charred dildo in a baggy suit. If only….
TMZ says that Kanye West is back on his meds after allegedly having a mental breakdown, and last night he flew to NYC with his medical team and Pimp Mama Kris’ leased piece Corey Gamble to interview psychiatrists that can help him whenever he’s on the East Coast. Well, the meds are clearly sugar pills provided by Dr. PMK, because this morning, he met with a level 10 attention whore whose throbbing and pus-stuffed ego maaaaaaay be bigger than his. Giving Donald Trump a compliment gives me the wet shits, but I have to slow clap for him for creating a building that’s strong enough to hold in those two Mars-sized egos.