If you ever needed a sign that we’re living in some backwards times, it might possibly be the one-two punch we’ve experienced in the past few days. Donald Trump’s former late-night bestie Jimmy Fallon has finally become the enemy, while weirdo director David Lynch popped out of nowhere and outed himself as a possible fan. 72-year-old white men with logic-defying hair gotta stick together, I guess?
Director/writer/artist/composer/doughnut philosopher, David Lynch, is bringing his acclaimed early ’90s series Twin Peaks back to Showtime. It’s been mighty mysterious so far, with very little revealed as to the plot, and that’s exactly how the father of Eraserhead wants it. He feels that movie marketing nowadays ruins everything and he’s through with making movies because of it. Continue reading
What you are looking at above is Ashley Judd, Jim Belushi, Amanda Seyfried, David Duchovny, Naomi Watts, Matthew Lillard, Michael Cera, Jennifer Jason Leigh, and Trent Reznor. And if you can believe it, you’re only looking at less than 20% of the cast of the Twin Peaks reboot. I hope Showtime knows how to place a casual encounters ad on Craigslist, because something tells me they’re going to need to make a couple extra bucks to make sure all those paychecks don’t bounce.
The cast list for Showtime’s Twin Peaks reboot was announced today. We already knew that most of the original cast was open to coming back. But thanks to Showtime, we now know that pretty much everyone in David Lynch’s Rolodex is coming with them. Variety has a screen grab of the cast list, and I’ve put it after the cut.
My motto every year is usually, “When all else fails, booze up and watch the Golden Girls,” but I may change it up for 2016 and follow David Lynch’s pro tip. In an old interview that’s been making the rounds again, noted doughnut-head David Lynch dropped some life advice that Homer Simpson can definitely get into:
“There’s the doughnut and there’s the hole, and you should keep your eye on the doughnut… The hole is so deep and so bad. The doughnut is a beautiful thing.”
So basically, David Lynch wants everyone to get diabetes.
On one hand, you should definitely keep your eye on the doughnut, because you never know when that dark-sided girl Damian from HELL, Ariana Grande Latte, is going to taint it by dropping her demon saliva on it. But on the other hand, if you’re a top, you need to do the opposite of David Lynch’s advice. You should focus on the hole, because it’s the worst when you slip out while thrusting and poke the side. That ruins everything.
Twin Peaks without David Lynch is like ruining feminism without Joss Whedon. I kid! I’m crossing pop culture streams here and it’s wrong. Anyway, David Lynch will be helming the Twin Peaks reboot. Let’s just hope we’re getting S1 amazing Twin Peaks as opposed to S2 Ugh-Is-That-Heather-Graham-I-Miss-Laura-Palmer-Wrapped-In-Plastic Twin Peaks. You should see that batshit crazy movie prequel though. There’s David Bowie and a mime. It’s hot.
— David Lynch (@DAVID_LYNCH) May 16, 2015
Showtime president David Nevins also released a hokey statement (via CNET):
“This damn fine cup of coffee from Mark [Frost] and David tastes more delicious than ever. Totally worth the extra brewing time and the cup is even bigger than we expected. David will direct the whole thing which will total more than the originally announced nine hours. Preproduction starts now!”
Twin Peaks made me realize that television could be quirky and awesome and not have to be The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air (I’m not including you, Original Aunt Viv, don’t meet me at the door). Reboots are usually V/The Bionic Woman/Charlie’s Angels-caliber fuckups. But David Lynch is here. Cue the backwards-talking little people and pie. Cue Ed of Ed’s Gas Farm and his wife Nadine with the eye patch and the greased drape chords. Cue Laura Palmer’s screechy mother played by the amazing Grace Zabriskie. Tighten that tuck and beat that face, David Duchovny!