The slyly THOT-ful Darren Criss, 32, got married. The Glee refugee and television serial killer married his lady love of eight years, Mia Swier, in New Orleans yesterday according to Us Weekly. Darren wore an all-white tux. What a slap in the face to all of us that white tux is. Why not keep it elegant yet simple by wearing a tuxedo speedo, Darren? You’re always wearing wacky shit anyways!
There was lots of glamour, color, and levity on display on the red carpet for last night’s Critics’ Choice Awards. And I’m going to go ahead and give all the credit to Judith Light. Judith set the tone, and everybody else did their level best to match her energy. There was probably a panicked buzz of “Judith Light, Judith Light, Judith Light” spreading among Hollywood stylists when they realized she was going to be there, forcing everyone to step up their game. Nobody quite got there, but they tried and that’s what counts. Ultimately, posing through Christian Siriano-made polka dots the size of dinner plates, Judith put all the kids on blast. If Judith wanted to be a real pal, she should have given a posing tutorial before the red carpet. Some people could really have used the help (see after the cut).
The Billboard Music Awards were last night and if the red carpet is any indication, it lived up to it’s name because most stars looked as bored as can be. With very few exceptions, most of the night’s looks were uninspired and devoid of whimsy. Nick Jonas (above) looks like he just showed up for his shift at Applebees and still needs to go get his flair from his locker and take a quick shot at the bar before getting started. He’ll be with you in a minute, ok?
The human representation of Taylor Swift Marketing Ploy #25 (“Platonically befriend dudes who don’t look like your other model friends so the world sees you’re not shallow.“), Ed Sheeran, got engaged. Hopefully his future bride didn’t see him in that “End Game” video. Please stop chucking the deuces, Ed. Bodies are still frozen mid-cringe after watching that. She might call off the wedding! (Oh, and Darren Criss got engaged, too.) Continue reading
According to Deadline, the family of Gianni Versace have released a statement denouncing Ryan Murphy’s latest scandal-based television offering. Needless to say, they won’t be throwing an The Assassination of Gianni Versace: American Crime Story viewing party in their mansion when it premieres next week.
If you’ve been following the making of Ryan Murphy’s latest bewigged dramatic extravaganza, The Assassination of Gianni Versace: American Crime Story, then you’ve probably already seen Darren Criss (Andrew Cunan), Edgar Ramirez (Gianni Versace), Penelope Cruz (Donatella Versace) and Ricky Martin (Gianni’s partner Antonio D’Amico) in character. But Entertainment Weekly got the first official picture of all of them together. That cover is a tacky, opulent 90s fever dream of Day-Glo messiness, and yes I’m going to force my family to recreate it for our 2017 Christmas card, and we don’t even do family Christmas cards! And yes, hair will be pulled and faces will be scratched as we fight over who gets to be the “Donatella.”