(Arrested Development voice) Him? That’s what a source who spoke to InTouch claims. Darren Aronofsky reportedly “pulled the plug” on his relationship with Jennifer Lawrence. According to InTouch’s source, Jennifer really, really loved Darren and thought they were going to get married. The source claims the two had conversations about moving into Jennifer’s Beverly Hills mansion and spending the rest of their lives together. That surprises me. It was my understanding that Darren’s conversation skills were limited solely to dissecting the piss-poor mother! reviews.
InTouch’s source says the break-up came down to kids. Specifically, 27-year-old Jennifer eventually wants them and 48-year-old Darren wasn’t so sure. Darren already has an 11-year-old son with Rachel Weisz, and was reluctant to have any more. Jennifer also wanted to take some time off from Hollywood, so he broke up with her. I wonder how a breakup orchestrated by Darren Aronofsky would go? I’m picturing a record playing backwards screechy violin music in a room lit with a single overhead flickering fluorescent light and “It’s Over” spelled out on a steel table in pills.
Hearing that Darren and Jennifer allegedly broke up based on their incompatible feelings about children reinforces my theory that transparency is so important in relationships. And it should start early! Ideally, every first date would start with a clear list of likes, like it did on MTV’s Next. Knowing if someone wants kids or idolizes Ryan Seacrest is the sort of information you should really have up front.
Jennifer Lawrence and Darren Aronoksky always felt extremely random. It seemed that the only thing they had in common was mother!, the film they made together. Well, they’re not together anymore, and as it turns out, they were barely even bonded over mother! talk while they were still together.
And there it goes, my hope of reading a future wedding day story about Jennifer Lawrence tripping repeatedly down the aisle in a busted Dior wedding gown while Darren Aronofsky waits impatiently at the end in his finest formal scarf. People magazine is reporting that JLaw and Darren have called it quits after a little more than a year of dating.
If I’m to take anything away from Requiem for a Dream (you know, besides drugs are bad), it’s that Darren Aronofsky makes whatever film he wants to make, no matter how fucked up or weird, and doesn’t care. Most of the time Darren’s bonkers movies are well received. And sometimes – cough mother! cough – they’re not.
If you took a peek on CinemaScore this weekend, you probably saw mother! had an “F” rating and instead went with the rest of the world to see It, which remained at the top of the weekend box office for the second week in a row. Even though critics have given the Darren Aronofsky-directed mother! a nearly 70% Rotten Tomatoes rating, viewers have likely renamed the movie mother!fucker, I can’t believe I spent $20 to see this at the fancy movie theater in town.
No, not that kind. Although it would be pretty funny to read about Jennifer Lawrence acting SO HARD, she shot a rubber birth control disc out of her business like a Frisbee and almost took out an assistant director, a gaffer, and the craft service table.