Portuguese soccer star Cristiano Ronaldo is going to be father again, with the announcement that his girlfriend Georgina Rodriguez is pregnant. This comes just two months after Cristiano welcomed twins Eva Maria and Mateo (who were born via surrogate).
Cristiano Ronaldo’s longtime football rival is Lionel Messi, and last year, Messy Messi was found guilty of tax fraud and sentenced to 21 months in the clink (he’s not going to jail and will serve probation instead). Well, here comes Crispy to show Messy Messi that he can do the tax evading thing better.
Charbroiled fútbol star (and alleged possible rapist?) Cristiano Ronaldo might be the proud father of twins, according to reports out of Portugal (via The Sun – which is Cristiano’s favorite paper, for obvious reasons).
Despite earlier reports that he was having twin sons, it looks like he’s now the proud “papai” (I get all my Portuguese from Google Translate because I can’t afford Rosetta Stone) of a boy and a girl. Eva and Mateo reportedly said “Olá!” to the world for the first time on Thursday, according to Portuguese TV channel, SIC. Cristiano’s camp hasn’t confirmed the happy news, but “several Portuguese websites and newspapers” are running with it.
Earlier this month, the German news magazine Der Spiegel reported that an American woman, they called “Susan K,” had accused the football-playing piece of overcooked bacon and soon-to-be father of three, Cristiano Ronaldo, of raping her in the penthouse of the Palms Casino Resort in Las Vegas in 2009. The report claimed that Susan K was scared for her life at the time so she didn’t report it to the police. He reportedly paid her $375,000 in hush money. At the time that Der Spiegel’s report came out, his team basically called the story fake news and said that it was built on unsigned documents and that the alleged victim has never come forward publicly. They made it sound like they were thinking of suing Der Spiegel. But it doesn’t look like they have yet and Der Spiegel has done the opposite of backing down. They doubled down on their story today and published what they claim are signed settlement documents. They also claim they have text messages from Cristiano about the settlement negotiations. Like a giant cloud covering the sun during Crispy’s skin-baking time, Der Spiegel isn’t playing around with him.
Get out of the pre-motorboating position, I wasn’t talking about that kind of glorious bronze bust.
If Eric Trump got a Hitler youth haircut, had his face lipo’d by a de-licensed back alley plastic surgeon, huffed so much helium that his eyes went all Parasite Hilton and got sprayed down by the same fake tan diarrhea that his dad gets sprayed down with, he would look like this bust of Cristiano Ronaldo.
It really is the era of multiples! (I’m talking about babies and sadly not talking about the return of Sandra Garratt’s Multiples clothing line.) Pharrell Williams’ wife had triplets, Madonna adopted twins, Beyonce and Amal Clooney are both having twins, and now The Sun is saying that a leased baby oven is carrying Cristiano Ronaldo’s twin boys. Congratulations to the makers of the ab roller for newborns, tanning oil for babies and brow waxing kits for kids, because they are about to get two more loyal clients.