The Hollywood Reporter is saying that Scarlett Johansson is going to get a huge ton of cash for working on the standalone Black Widow movie which recently got its director. According to THR, Scarlett’s salary is equal to what the delicious Captain of America, Chris Evans, and what the hunky God of Thunder and Muscle Mass, Chris Hemsworth, were paid for Avengers: Infinity War, Captain America: Civil War and Thor: Ragnarok. Scarlett will be earning a grandios $15 million for playing Black Widow in her own movie.
The always reliable CelebrityNetWorth.com claims Chris Hemsworth is worth this much:
When I look at that number, I curse at the Gods for not making me be born into Elsa Pataky. Because not only did she get to take a ride on one of my favorite panty creamers Adrien Brody’s glorious nose while screaming, “Give me the sneeze, snot up all in this, bitch,” in a damn castle, but she currently gets to scrub her genitals on Thor’s mega washboard abs as money falls out of his ass. But when Chris Hemsworth looks at that number, he gags as though his team of personal trainers just told him that his body fat went from 0% to 0.1%. Millionaire movie stars are just like us: they too get grossed out while looking at their bank account balance.
Apparently all eyes were on Angelina Jolie on Golden Globes night. If you weren’t sneaking a quick glance to detect if a pair of devil horns popped up through her hair when Jennifer Aniston walked out on stage, you might have been staring at her table buddy. Angelina Jolie was seated next to Chris Hemsworth. Angelina and Chris hadn’t appeared in a movie together, and Chris’ wife Elsa Pataky was nowhere to be seen. Chris was on Ellen yesterday and Ellen DeGeneres said that people made a “thing” out of him sitting next to Angelina. Chris says it’s not a thing.
Angelina Jolie Decided To Fulfill Someone’s Feathered 60s Fantasy Last Night (And Other Looks From The Golden Globes)
Almost everyone who walked the Golden Globes red carpet this year wore black to protest Hollywood’s sexual misconduct problem. One thing that wasn’t being protested was good taste. There were a lot of black velvet outfits on that red carpet. Sure, it’s a bit of an obvious choice, but a choice I was absolutely here for, because anything that makes my brain start blasting “Black Velvet” by Alannah Myles gets two thumbs up from me.
But some people went a little more experimental with their all-black interpretation. Like Angelina Jolie, who showed up to the Golden Globes in some goth Lawrence Welk Show realness by Atelier Versace. It’s a little Barbra Streisand at the 1969 Oscars, with a splash of 60s televangelist, all poured onto a fainting couch and garnished with, “But detective, I swear my husband was dead when I found him!”
A fresh glimpse of a shirtless Chris Hemsworth is probably the best part of this story. Marvel took a huge infodump (how nicely put) at San Diego Comic-Con this weekend. They debuted the new trailer for Thor: Ragnarok (aka Chris Hemsworth Has A Better Haircut And Remains A Thirst Trap), showed the first image of Brie Larson as Captain Marvel, and announced who would be playing the part of the FIRST Wasp in Ant-Man and the Wasp. It’s kind of a big name. I hope she sings “Cool Rider” in the movie to distract me, because I can only take so much of Paul Rudd’s “I’ll always be funnier than you” smirk. (And if you figured out who the actress in question is because of that song title, we are friends til’ the end.) Continue reading
Yesterday, I posted about Charlie Hunnam and his “considerably high-ranking on the heat index” hotness. Well, apparently I am easily horned up (“no shit, huh?” – Dlisted readers).
Thor (aka Chris Hemsworth) put the following little snippet of sexy on Instagram. Sons of Anarchy rolling asscheeks who? Thor is working out. Thor is working out shirtless. Thor is wiggling ropes in front of himself in a suggestive manner. THOR IS WEARING A DAMN HARNESS AND BACKING HIS ASS UP. I see you, Thor. I know this is supposedly you throwing your trainer an Instagram advertorial bone. But I know the actual bone you’re selling AND I AM BUYING.
The other Mr. Harvey, being a fellow horny trampasaurus, is usually fairly chill about me lusting over other dudes. I think it was the drool collecting on the laptop that earned me the side-eye, and what I think was a later Internet search for what legally separating entails.
Check out Chris Hemsworth working it out below.