Last night was the Los Angeles premiere of Gifted, the movie where recent exes Jenny Slate and Chris Evans met each other (and then subsequently got together after she gave her husband walking papers). Most exes would probably rather fake diarrhea than pose and smile next to an ex, but not Jenny and Chris. Jenny and Chris love each other so much. They have nothing but cavity-triggering sweetness to say about each other. And Chris is still saying nice things about Jenny. Chris recently told USA Today that you can’t find “something bad to say about her.” No no, we know that Chris – you’ve proved that already.
Jenny and Chris may look awkward and uncomfortable in that picture above, but I’m sure that’s just because they’re reacting to a reporter that dared them to say something not-nice about each other. That wasn’t the case all night. Eventually they looked more than happy to see each other.
chris evans and jenny slate at the gifted premiere just killed what was left of my soul. pic.twitter.com/H4PWy0LoO4
— Anna Menta (@annalikestweets) April 5, 2017
So much smiling! They look like they belong on a box of Kashi Good Friends cereal. But for all that smiling, they got lazy where it counts. I’m talking about their outfits. It’s not enough that you say you’re still great friends, you’ve got to show us you’re great friends. If Jenny and Chris are as great of friends as they claim they are, then it’s insane to me that they didn’t oversell it on the red carpet. No matching his and hers I’m With THE BEST t-shirts? No gold-plated broken heart BFF necklaces? I’m just so disappointed in their commitment to a post-dating friendship.
Chris Evans and Jenny Slate dated for a little less than a year and called it quits almost two months ago, and I thought that would be the last we’d hear of that random pairing. But it wasn’t. Chris and Jenny have lots to say about each other. Last week, Jenny gushed about her ex during an interview with Vulture. Now Chris is the one gushing about Jenny. Old Faithful better watch out, because Chris and Jenny are coming for its job.
Chris recently spoke to People to promote Gifted, the movie they met on. Here’s all the over-the-top lovely things Chris had to say about Jenny.
“She’s my favorite human. She’s the best. I’ve never ever ever met someone in my life who has a mastery of the English language the way she does. She’ll give you one sentence and there’s no fat to it. You’re like, ‘You just chose such an unbelievable collection of words that beautifully articulate what you say.’
It’s like an art form talking with her, because the visuals associated with her expression are just so colorful. She’s so vulnerable, so honest, so interested in other people more than herself, she’s incredibly compassionate, there’s just nothing to not love about her.”
Chris might be overselling how much he loOoOoOoves his ex-girlfriend, just a little. Especially since Jenny admitted during her interview with Vulture that she hasn’t really seen or spoken to Chris since they broke up. Like, if your ex-girlfriend is your “favorite human” and hearing her say “Hey, what’s up?” can make the clouds part and the sky fill with sunshine and singing birds, maybe she should be upgraded back to girlfriend? Or at least call her once in a while? Just a thought.
During an interview with Vulture, Jenny Slate got into her thing with Chris Evans. Jenny and Chris went “official” as a couple last June, and were together for almost a year. Their relationship allegedly croaked because they were both just too busy to be a couple. Either Jenny is really trying to sell the whole “There was no drama!” angle or Chris’ PR person tearfully begged her to say a lot of nice things about him if anyone asks.
This is news that will either make you reach for several grains of the salt of your choice or scream with delight that two of the Avengers might be doing it. According to Star (via Hollywood Life), Scarlett Johansson and Chris Evans are fixing to get together.
We’re finally ending our never-ending Oscar coverage today and the best way to end it is with some man pieces who were probably suffocating in their nut-hugging pants and wanted to take it all off halfway through the show. They should’ve. It would’ve made that mess a hundred million times better and awakened all my senses.
My best dressed chick of the Oscars is definitely Charlize Theron, because with that ponytail, casual diamond earrings and daytime gold la-may gown, she was done up like Alexis Carrington making a quick trip to the supermarket. It was very daytime casual Dynasty. And my best dressed dude is definitely Ryan Gosling, who looks like he reeks of Jovan Musk oil and is about to pick you up in his dad’s gold two-tone Lincoln Continental Mark V to take you to the senior prom where he’s going to feel you up while slow dancing to The Closer I Get To You. And he’s definitely the one who spiked the punch.
Ryan wore Gucci (duh) and I couldn’t tell if those were actual ruffles or trompe l’oeil ruffles (Side note: I don’t do drag, but if I ever did, I’ve got dibs on the name Tramp Louie Ruffles.) And then there’s the smooth rat Pharrell, who dressed like a maître d at an underground restaurant that only serves virgin blood and is owned by Kunty Karl. There’s a reason why Pharrell looks like that. He’s wearing Chanel.
And here’s a million more pictures of the dudes from the Oscars. Come for Mahershala Ali and come again for hot piece of wood Jamie Dornan.
Every day, I read a story that makes me think that we’re all trapped in one really long acid trip, and one day we’ll wake up in the desert and realize that we just dropped the wrong shit at Burning Man. That’s all. J. Harvey covered one of those stories this past weekend.
This surreal fight started when Chris Evans tweeted about the confirmation of Jeff Sessions as Attorney General and said that if racist demon anus David Duke agrees with that choice, then something is really really wrong. Captain America’s tweet awoke the dehydrated tape worm and he spit back by calling Chris Evans a “dumb actor” and other shit. I thought that was the end of another WTF fight for the WTF feuds history books. But then Reverend Henry Kane’s more evil older half-brother kept on going.