There have been a lot of people saying Cheryl Tweedy was smart to not get hitched to Liam Payne of One Direction since she already has 90 last names and was heading for a split with him, but he says all is fine. Tension is normal, y’all! Continue reading
Real estate by nature is just a barbaric, bloodthirsty industry. Just think about the average open house: some smiling middle-aged woman named Pam in a Talbots pantsuit hungry for a commission shows you around while describing the sounds of gunshots as “the charming soundtrack of an eclectic neighborhood” and a mildewed-to-death bathroom as “rustic chic.” Real estate moves of any kind are shady, and when you throw in celebrity real estate moves, that gives every tabloid editor a fever dream of a new home addition they’ll be able to afford with the breaking scoop. Rumors of Liam Payne and Cheryl doing some house plotting of their own is the reason du jour of why they most definitely are breaking up. Continue reading
Nothing sells tabloids in England like transcripts of a wire-tapped phone conversation of the Royal Family or Cheryl Cole breakup rumors (what will her next last name be?!), but the latest round of relationship-on-the-rocks reports may be false…or at least not ready to be announced until some financial settlement is made. Cheryl was rumored to be in “crisis talks” with the father of her baby Liam Payne, and it wasn’t just a crisis of some of the fug fashion he rocks on Instagram. While the word was they were oh-so-close to breaking up, they both arrived to the red carpet of the BRIT Awards tonight in London looking like their usual Mrs. Robinson-and-boytoy selves. Continue reading
All the cougars in the den are pouring one out today for Cheryl And The Amazing Technicolor Changing Last Name (but we know her best as Cheryl Cole), as reports have emerged that things aren’t so rosy at the One Direction/Girls Aloud Estate. Cheryl and Liam Payne are reportedly on the cusp of splitting up. Coincidentally, he has a new single out with Rita Ora. Color me shocked! Continue reading
Yes, finally; I’m sure there’s at least one person out there who was anxiously bouncing their legs in anticipation. Good news, that person – we’ve got a name! Cheryl and the One Directioner Liam Payne made a baby boy who was born five weeks ago. At the time, Cheryl and Liam both made it known in their social media birth announcements that they didn’t have a name for their kid yet. Yesterday, The Daily Mail claimed that Cheryl and Liam named their baby Bear Payne. That news was confirmed by Liam after he was congratulated on Twitter by urine-drinking wilderness person Bear Grylls.
— Liam (@LiamPayne) May 2, 2017
The Daily Mail says that both Cheryl and Liam know Bear Grylls and he may have been the inspiration for their kid’s name. Well, that or Cheryl and Liam threw a dart at a list of Quirky-ish Famous Baby Names and hit Alicia Silverstone, Jamie Oliver, Kate Winslet’s favorite.
But back to that name. Bear Payne doesn’t even sound like the name of a baby; it sounds like a home-made alcoholic energy drink for lumberjacks. If Yogi trained Boo Boo as an MMA fighter, his Octagon name would be Bear Payne. All I really know is that if Bear and his mom were to get into Britain’s Motherboy circuit, Cher & Bear would be a great team name.
Former One Direction member Liam Payne twinked a fetus into former Girls Aloud member Cheryl (tn: Cheryl Ann Tweedy Cole Fernandez-Versini) nine months ago, and now that future British pop icon has emerged from the birth canal.
Liam announced on Instagram that Cheryl uncrossed her legs and gave the world a whole slew of upcoming OK! and HELLO! magazine articles on Wednesday of this week. One Direction fans who wanted Liam’s seed for their own wombs (and have also had to deal with another 1D-er spawning fairly recently) must already be suggesting baby names on social media. Although, I’m not sure “CherylColeIsEvilAndImLiamsOneAndOnly” is something you find in a baby naming book.