Category: Charles Manson

Bryan Cranston Had A Run-In With Charles Manson

November 21, 2017 / Posted by:

When I was but a lad (like 13 maybe?), I checked out Helter Skelter from the local library (remember those?) one summer and gave myself the permanent terrors. I had to read the book on our front porch in direct sunlight because of hippie chicks with large knives creepy-crawling into houses and murdering everyone for silly reasons decades before. To this day, I have a recurring nightmare where I’m alone at night in my childhood home and the doorbell rings and I open it to find a grinning and (for some odd reason that I assure you is not about lust) naked Charlie Manson asking if he can come in. *horrified scream*

America’s premier boogeyman died the other day, but the terror lives on. As evidenced by the probably boring story above, everyone wants to share theirs about how scary he was. Walter White’s no exception! Bryan Cranston tweeted about an encounter he had with Tiny Murder Jesus when Charlie was at the height of his powers lording it over the flower waifs at Spahn Ranch. Continue reading

Charles Manson Has Died

November 20, 2017 / Posted by:

Somebody go wake up Satan, he’s got another guest coming for Thanksgiving. TMZ reports that Charles Manson has finally stopped sucking air. TMZ says the late Sharon Tate’s sister Debra Tate received the call confirming that Charles finally kicked the bucket.

Debra Tate tells TMZ she received a call from the prison telling her Manson died 8:13pm Sunday. We’re told the prison is contacting all of the victims’ families. Manson died of natural causes, according to prison officials.

Charles Manson, the charismatic cult leader who was imprisoned for orchestrating the brutal murders of Sharon Tate, her unborn child and six others over a two night period in 1969, will be missed by no one. His original death sentence was ruled unconstitutional in 1971 and he was given 9 consecutive life sentences instead. That loser could barely manage one. Lame!

In life, Charles Manson was a terrorist who manipulated people’s weakness and insecurities into doing his bidding and who held the nation hostage using our own darkest fears against us. After his arrest, conviction, and incarceration, he became a punchline. In death he is, in his own words, “nobody. Well, nobody except for the odd time when someone gets curious and researches the origin of Marilyn Manson’s stage name.

The fog of rancor and divisiveness and the disrespect shown to our fellow citizens in #thesetryingtimes is enough to make a person lose track of some of the things that bind and unite us as a nation. In an age where there are people propping up pedophiles or defending alleged rapists, it’s nice to know there is one thing we can all agree on: Charles Manson was a evil mother fucker and we’re glad he’s gone.

Pic: California Department of Corrections

Charles Manson Is Reportedly On Death’s Door

November 16, 2017 / Posted by:

Satan may be calling home one of his favorite little buddies. Multiple outlets including TMZ are reporting that coo-coo crazy cult leader Charles Manson is ailing in a bad way. It’s really unfortunate timing for the swastika foreheaded grand pappy to lose his grip on life just as his predicted Helter Skelter race war seems like it might actually be happening. I never thought I’d say this but Charlie might just have earned himself his first and only “I told you so!”.

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