Here I was thinking that Pimp Mama Kris was the komedian of the koven (see: PMK saying that everyone can relate to at least one member of her stable of fame whores), but Caitlyn Jenner proved that she’s got fresher and edgier jokes!
Just as long as she’s running and not driving, amirite?
Caitlyn Jenner is still promotoing her memoir The Secrets Of My Life, and last night she appeared on CNN Tonight with Don Lemon. Caitlyn often talks about politics and still supports a certain undercooked chicken strip. So it should come as no surprise that she was asked if she’s going to start kissing babies and handing out buttons that say IT’S GREAT WITH CAIT. According to Caitlyn Jenner, that day could be come in the next year or two.
When Jabba the Trump revoked federal guidelines that allowed trans kids to choose the bathroom at school that fits their identity, the ambassador to all trans people, Caitlyn Jenner, did a video message where she read lines that were totally written by her. She let the overlord of the United States know that she’s not going to stand for this and he should call her. In news that may cause you to shit your chonines out of shock, Trump hasn’t called Caitlyn. But while whoring out her memoir during a 20/20 interview with Diane Sawyer, Caitlyn said that the Republican party better watch it, because she’s coming after them now that they’ve messed with “her community.” The Republican politicians are probably laughing at that, but they won’t be laughing when they look in the rearview mirror of their car and see Caitlyn speeding up behind them in her Escalade.
Caitlyn Jenner writes in her memoir, The Secrets Of My Life, about having gender reassignment surgery, but she probably knew that she’d need something ESCANDALOSO to drop in order to really sell that shit. Enter: the O.J. case.
Since the O.J. Simpson murder case got a lot of attention last year thanks to American Crime Story and O.J.:Made In America, Caitlyn brings it up in her book. Caitlyn pulls out some brand new information that Robert Kardashian totally didn’t say himself in 1996. Radar posted a piece from Caitlyn’s book where she claims that Robert told her in so many words that he thought O.J. did it. Caitlyn also writes that she believes Robert only took the case because Pimp Mama Kris hated O.J. and he wanted to get back at her for moving on from their marriage and marrying a gold medal-winning athlete. Caitlyn should really get another gold medal in the sport of Making It All About Her.
Caitlyn Jenner’s memoir, The Secrets Of My Life, is coming out soon and usually when a fame whore’s got a book to peddle, their publisher burps out an excerpt that is guaranteed to get a billion headlines. Radar is the only one who has this excerpt from Caitlyn’s book about getting gender reassignment surgery, so I’m squinting at it the same way I squint at a timeshare salesperson who tells me that they’ll give me 2 free tickets to a booze cruise if I just sit in on a 20-minute pitch (that I know will take 9 hours and end with me crying mercy on the carpet). But let’s go with it anyway. (UPDATE: Radar was telling the truth and People has confirmed that Caitlyn did go through surgery.)
We all know that when it comes to dressing for the Oscars, everyone takes it very seriously. They put on a tux or fancy gown that definitely didn’t come with a check attached to the garment bag. Most of the time the result is a one-way ticket to Zzzzzz town (see: a good 75% of the looks from last night). But then everyone gets to let loose at Vanity Fair’s annual Oscar afterparty and put on what they really want to wear (see: The Gold Standard). Like many people at the Vanity Fair party, Diane Kruger wasn’t at the Oscars and she showed up wearing that.