Category: Bond Shit

Harry Styles’ Name Has Come Up As Another Choice For The Next Bond

January 23, 2018 / Posted by:

Over the years, we’ve heard talk of the possibility of a Black Bond (Idris Elba), we’ve heard talk of a Thirsty Bond (Tom Hiddleston) and there was even talk of an Aussie Bond (Hugh Jackman)! But is the world ready for talk of a Baby Bond? While Flinty Bond (Daniel Craig) still has the role on lockdown for one last go-round, one of the editors on Spectre, Lee Smith, had the brilliant idea that Harry Styles should be the next James Bond, reports The Daily Mail.

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Sony Is Throwing $150 Million At Daniel Craig To Play James Bond Again

September 6, 2016 / Posted by:

Last week, the always-truthful British literary periodical known as The Sun said that Bond producer Barbara Broccoli and the head bitches at Sony came up with a short list of actors who could possibly replace STAINS eyeball twin Daniel Craig if he really decides to hang up his tux for good. Idris Elba, Tom Hiddleston, Michael Fassbender, Luke Evans, Aidan Turner, Charlie Hunnam, James Norton and Billy Elliot were all on that short list, according to The Sun. But well, the always-truthful American literary periodical known as Radar claims that the head bitches at Sony aren’t even thinking about touching that short list and are instead sending dump trucks full of gold bars to Daniel Craig’s house, because they really, really want him back. Those around Tom Hiddleston better brace their eardrums, because I have a feeling that the internal scream he’s been holding in for months is going to come shooting out of his mouth when he finds out that he dad-danced at a Selena Gomez concert and played patty cake with Taylor Swift’s cats for NOTHING!

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Tom Hiddleston’s Bond Dreams Might Not Be Over Just Yet

August 22, 2016 / Posted by:

Praise be to the publicity stunt relationship gods up above! Unless it’s an emergency, don’t count on being able to reach Tom Hiddleston anytime in the next 24 hours. He’s going to be busy saying 1000 Hail Taylors on the James Bond rosary he made from threading a dozen martini olives onto a black bow tie.

Earlier this month, author Frederick Forsyth claimed that a source had told him that there was “no way” Bond producer Barbara Broccoli was going to pick Tom Hiddleston as Daniel Craig’s replacement. But according to Express UK, Frederick’s source was wrong. They say that Barbara Broccoli hasn’t completely crossed Tom’s name off her list.

Since he’s still got a chance, Tom has reportedly been trying to show everyone that he can do it. A source tells Express UK that he’s been trying to prove that he’s as tough as Daniel Craig by performing some of his own stunts on the set of Thor: Ragnarok. The source adds that when Tom isn’t being Taylor Swift’s boyfriend in the US, he’s “subtly campaigning” for the role by running, lifting weights, and hanging around the stunt department on the Australian set.

Did that source even have to specify that he’s being subtle? Why, “Subtle” is practically his middle name. You know, I’d hate for all that subtlety to go over Barbara Broccoli’s head. If he really wants to get the message across, he should probably start showing up to set in a tuxedo with his head poking out of a giant cardboard cutout of the inside of a gun barrel.

Here’s Tom looking like Loki in Richard Lewis drag on the set of Thor 3  with a Thor-ed up Chris Hemsworth this past weekend.

Pics: Splash

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