Just because Armie Hammer may SEEM like the guy from a really wealthy family (he is), it doesn’t mean he’s talking their money. What a moron, right? Armie is 32, but he sure sounds 92 sometimes. In a recent interview with British GQ, Armie says he’s not a normal millennial, he’s a cool millennial who gets the dry heaves when he sees avocado toast on a menu. He didn’t say that, but he may as well have since it’s about the only thing he didn’t bitch about. He walked back an apology and maintains people were tacky with their Stan Lee tributes on social media AND wants to remind you he doesn’t take a red cent from his wealthy family.
Earlier this week, Armie Hammer had the internet thinking: “Damn, you were a lot more fun when you were eating peaches and dancing to The Psychedelic Furs” after he came for celebrities posting memorial selfies with the late Stan Lee. Armie held firm that if you posted a picture of yourself with Stan Lee, you were tacky and self-absorbed, and he was above all that. Enough people must have called him by his new nickname (aka Asshat, which we’ll get to in a moment), because he’s now very sorry.
Yesterday the news broke that comic book legend Stan Lee had passed, and many famous people paid their digital respects. I was expecting many tweets playing off his catchphrase “Excelsior!“, but I saw a lot more pictures go up of famous people posing with Stan himself. This didn’t bother me, but it bothered Armie Hammer.
Note that I left out the word “mess,” as there’s no question that the messiest part of the red carpet was most likely the three square feet of space occupied by Ryan Seacrest.
If there was an award for red carpet fashion that makes you question a stylist’s sanity, Nicole Kidman would be that category’s Meryl Streep. Nicole arrived in an Armani Prive gown that does double duty. From the waist-up she’s very mascot of a sexy frozen fish company, and from the waist down I’m getting a reminder to please separate my plastic recyclables from my paper.
Armie Hammer woke up and reached for the cranky pants that are too tight in the crotch again yesterday and #tooktotwitter to pop off at his number one enemy, that damn woman from BuzzFeed! Senior culture writer Anne Helen Peterson (whose post last November titled Ten Long Years Of Trying To Make Armie Hammer Happen made Armie want to throw his dolly at the nanny and led him to quit briefly quit Twitter) opined on a Vanity Fair interview with Jennifer Lawrence and Armie took offense.
People who just can’t get enough of seeing a curly-topped twink climb on top of a beefy American mountain named Mt. Hammer (I’m talking to you, James Woods) got their lives made when director Luca Guadagnino said a few months ago that he’s hoping Call Me By Your Name will turn into a series of movies like that Before Sunrise shit starring Ethan Hawke and Julie Delpy. Luca did a recent interview with The Hollywood Reporter where he said that he’s already working on ideas for Call Me By Your Name 2: Electric Peachaloo.