“You caint do nuthin’ you cain’t do nuthin about” – R. Kelly
Wiser words were never spoken, well by R. Kelly at least. Those were his thoughts as he shared with fans the devastating results of the burglary that occurred at two of his properties in Atlanta while he was out on tour. In a series of posts on Instagram, Kelly gave a rundown of how much was taken from him over the course of the two-day heist. And in case you’re wondering, the answer is yes, R. Kelly’s crib is just as tacky as you might imagine.
The next season of FX’s American Crime Story was supposed to have been about 2005’s Hurricane Katrina and its aftermath. But it looks like speedos and serial murder trump terrifying natural disaster and the destruction of almost an entire city. In an interview with The Hollywood Reporter, one of the directors of ACS’ first season (The People Vs. O.J. Simpson) says that the show might not happen at all. Continue reading
The second season of American Crime Story hasn’t even started filming yet, but FX has already ordered and fast-tracked a third season, which will be all about insane serial killer Andrew Cunanan and Gianni Versace’s murder in 1997. Somewhere in the Scientology Celebrity Centre bathhouse, John Travolta busted out of his private massage room and ran off to work on his Italian accent and search his closet for Versace silk shirts from the 90s.
FX’s promo schedule for Ryan Murphy’s latest camp extravaganza American Crime Story: The People v. O.J. Simpson has felt as long as that white Bronco chase on the freeway. For weeks, they’ve released teaser trailers and promo pictures, and today they finally put out the official trailer and it looks like it’s going to be a beautiful disaster. It’s pretty much looks like O.J. Simpson: The Telenovela.
The trailer has John Travolta looking like a barbecued Raisinet as Robert Shapiro, Cheryl Ladd delivering a world-class eyebrow situation as Robert Shapiro’s wife, Sarah Paulson doing her signature Sarah Paulson cry with two brown mops on her head, Cuba Gooding Jr. sounding like he needs four bags of throat lozenges, Selma Blair gossiping at Nicole Brown’s funeral as Pimp Mama Kris and David Schwimmer bawling in a car as Robert Kardashian. (He’s probably bawling in the car because he realizes he’s defending a demon and is married to a demon too). And there’s also Connie Britton as the morally corrupt Faye Resnick:
That’s pretty much just Connie Britton wearing a lipstick color that only existed in the 90s, but I’ll take it.
And I wonder who is playing the pivotal role of the jury forewoman who fucked up Orenthal James Simpson’s name while reading the verdict? Every time I see the name “O.J. Simpson,” I always read it as, “Orenjal James Simpson.“