Category: Alexander Skarsgard

Alexander Skarsgard And Alexa Chung Might Be Back Together 

March 8, 2018 / Posted by:

There are definitely people who were hoping the next time we heard about Alexander Skarsgard’s love life, it would be the news that he dropped down on one knee and asked Jack McBrayer to be the little blond to his big blond . Everyone will have to keep waiting for that, because E! News says that Alexander was recently seen with his ex-girlfriend Alexa Chung.

41-year-old Alexander and 34-year-old Alexa split up eight months ago, and on Sunday, they were seen arriving in London from a train trip together.

A witness tells UsWeekly they seemed “happy, but a bit tired” and were holding hands. Another source says that people shouldn’t be surprised to see Alexa with Alexander because she’s not a dump-and-delete type:

“Alexa is always friends with her exes. She’s always cool with everyone she dates and stays in contact and even will hang out with them after they break up. She and her other exes have hung out after they break up and [Skarsgard] is no exception. They still text each other all the time and met up when they were in the same city.”

So that could have been a romantic train trip to London from…I don’t know, Hogwarts? Or it could have just been two friends being train buddies together. We’ll never know. It could very well be platonic. I would absolutely text an ex and ask if they want to ride the midnight train with me. If I’m going to wake up to discover I’ve been drooling on someone’s shoulder for an hour, I’d rather it not be the shoulder of a disgusted stranger.

Pic: Wenn.com

Open Post: Hosted By The Beautiful Blond Bromance Of Alexander Skarsgard And Jack McBrayer

January 22, 2018 / Posted by:

Seen above doing the “ohmyguuuuuts, I knew I shouldn’t have told him to go balls deep” pose (or the “daaaaamn, I knew I should’ve douched, now I’m gonna leave dookie on the dick” pose), Jack McBrayer was Alexander Skarsgard’s seatmate at the SAG Awards last night, and nobody has ever been happier than Jack sitting next to ASkars. Jack looked like he was getting a rim job from a rainbow. Just pure happiness covered his face. Basically, he had the same reaction that anybody sitting next to ASkars would have.

Since ASkars was sitting with his Big Little Lies co-stars, some probably wondered if they missed the part in the series where Kenneth from 30 Rock played Reese Witherspoon’s just-as-perky ambiguously gay brother. But Jack was sitting next to ASkars because they’ve been best brofriends for a while.

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ASkars And The Brit Fashion Chick Are Over

July 14, 2017 / Posted by:

It seems like the life has been sucked out of vampire Eric and Alexa Chung’s relationship. After more than two years together, Alexander Skarsgard and Alexa Chung are done. Thank God, because “Alex&Alexa sounds like an IKEA ottoman and its slipcover.

But he’s not spending his nights all sad at home. Page Six says that Nordic hottie Alexander Skarsgard took a vacation from my wet dreams (oh, back off, prudes!) and went out with (Leonardo DiCaprio’s ex) model (well, duh) Toni Garrn. They went on a blind date to the Dairy Queen in Montauk last weekend. Just kidding, Dairy Queen is too nice a place for a first date!

However, it doesn’t sound like Alex and Toni will go out with each other again. A source said, “They didn’t hit it off big-time. There may not be a second date in the cards.” Maybe it’s too soon for Tarzan?

But back to Alexa. Along with making me scratch my head as to why Alexa is viewed as such a *Hi-FAhShUN mUuUuZZzzzzzZZe* to sartorialists everywhere, she has been a bit of a Jane of the Jungle, swinging from A-Lister to A-Lister. She dated the lead singer of the Arctic Monkeys for a while, as well as a lengthy line-up of other rockers. Some even speculated Chris Martin was the jade egg in her vagine, and therefore why Gwyneth Paltrow and the Frodo of white people music consciously uncoupled. In short, I’m jealous.

Pic: Wenn.com

Open Post: Hosted By  Alexander Skarsgard’s Sunburnt Nips 

June 26, 2017 / Posted by:

Tall glass of Swedish leche, Alexander Skarsgard, is still in Capri, and yesterday the paps took pictures of him sunning his nipple knobs on a yacht. Poor ASkars’ skin looks about as hot as genitals get when its owner looks at shirtless pictures of him. His burnt-up body could really use a wet visit from some aloe vera. So on that note, I’m going to leave this here:

shapeshiftingspellaskars2017

Sure that’s a spell to turn you into a shapeshifting animal, but I bet you could turn yourself into aloe vera instead. But before you shapeshift into aloe vera, make sure to give a trustworthy friend specific instructions on how to FedEx you to ASkars in Capri. Because you don’t want to go to all the trouble of shapeshifting into aloe vera only to find yourself getting spread all over a piece that ain’t ASkars.

Pics: Backgrid

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