Category: Airport Drama
Alec Baldwin Got Dragged On Instagram For (Twice) Complaining About His Flight Being Delayed
Hopefully, Alec Baldwin’s “sometimes mommy” Hilaria Baldwin was on standby at the Vancouver International Airport, waiting to creepily cradle his perpetually petulant ass in her lap as soon as he touched down because he recently whined like a big ol’ baby on Instagram about his flight there getting delayed by 7 ½ hours. Naturally, most commenters had no sympathy for him. But at least no one was hurt over it (this time).
Keke Palmer Says She Faced Breast Milk Discrimination At The Houston Airport
Back in February, Keke Palmer gave birth to her first baby. It was a boy, and she and her partner, Darius Jackson, named him Leodis Andrellton Jackson (“Leo” for short). Yesterday, 29-year-old Keke took to Twitter to share some new-mom grievances. People reports that Amy encountered “breast milk discrimination” while traveling through the Houston Airport with her son. Apparently, TSA threatened to throw out over 16 ounces of breast milk Keke had pumped for baby Leo cuz it was over the carry-on liquid limit of 3.4 ounces. Soooo breast milk is OK inside the breast, but not outside? What’s next? I won’t be allowed to fly with a giant bottle of my own piss??
Marlon Wayans Speaks Out After An Altercation With A United Airline Gate Agent
If you’ve ever been to an airport, then you know it’s filled with zombies shuffling through the motions to get the hell out as quickly as possible. And when you’re on the go like Marlon Wayans, you need to be sure you don’t have any hiccups in your schedule to avoid delays in getting paid. But this was the case during a United Airlines flight where Marlon says he was targeted by a gate agent who made him miss a gig in Kanas City. Now Marlon feels the wrath of Americans everywhere who have been at the mercy of jaded gate agents. And he can’t believe they would treat one of their first-class passengers in such a horrific manner.
Open Post: Hosted By The TSA Reminding People To Not Send Pets Through The Airport Security X-Ray Machine
Every day in airports across the world, security screeners probably get heaping eyefuls of the skeletal inner workings of double dongs, anal beads, and pocket pussies. But earlier this week, airport security agents experienced the utter shock of seeing the inside of an actual pussy! Surprisingly, this isn’t even the first time this has happened, and the TSA is reminding travelers that sending furry friends through the x-ray machine is a no-no, and they must let the cat out of the bag.
Open Post: Hosted By South Korea Lifting Its Ban On Imported Sex Dolls
If you’ve somehow been diverted to a South Korean airport in the midst of all of the recent flight cancellation chaos, be careful that you don’t get lost on your way to the bathroom and end up in one of their confiscated sex doll rooms. South Korean airports have been intercepting sex dolls imported from other countries for years now (I guess unless they’re tasked with filling seats). However, the South Korean government must not have much on its plate at the moment because they’ve assembled to rule that South Koreans are now free to fuck life-like silicone mannequins from any country of their choosing; so book that trip, Kylie Jenner (fly commercial though)!
Open Post: Hosted By The Abandoned San Francisco Airport Dog Finding His “Furever” Home With A United Airlines Pilot
United Airlines ranks nowhere near the top of any of “The Best Airlines in America” lists (just ask Mayim Bialik), unless you’re a sweet puppy whose first owner decided to inexplicably yeet you from their luggage at San Francisco International Airport. Polaris, a 6-month-old German Shepard, was left at the airport this summer after his human decided to continue their travels without him. Luckily, United Airlines assisted the SPCA in Polaris’ care from abandonment up until he was finally adopted by one of United’s pilots, just in time to have a home for the holidays.