Angel wings were puckered in anxiety over the weekend when Adriana Lima made an Instagram post that sounded like she was ditching her Victoria’s Secret gig, but word on the street is that is not the case and she’ll rock a push-up bra and wings even if she needs a walker to get down the runway.
Adriana said she wouldn’t take her clothes off for an empty cause, but I guess “empty cause” is just Portuguese for “no money” since the Brazilian beauty is now said to be sticking to her earlier words of wanting to strut for a few more years. TMZ reports the Insta post was only in reference to the tacky video shoot that Adriana was offered. Her Victoria’s Secret work is safe. That must come as a relief to booking agents since the talent hasn’t exactly been sticking around!
She told People during the most recent VS fashion show that she planned on making it to at least 20 of the annual shows (she’s currently at 18) but “maybe more.” Make it maybe more, Adriana!!! With Gisele Bundchen long in the rearview mirror, this is your time to rake in that coin. Sashaying down the VS catwalk in a Depends is way more respectable than peddling a home line like Kathy Ireland’s at Ashley Furniture!
2017 was the last year anyone would ever see Victoria’s Secret Underwear Angel Alessandra Ambrosio strut down the runway of their annual primetime
commercial fashion show. As it turns out, Alessandra might not be the only model hanging up her thong and retiring. 36-year-old Adriana Lima could possibly be done with VS too.
The annual Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show happened last night in Shanghai! The good news is, it wasn’t a total disaster. Despite some stumbling blocks erected by the Chinese Government, they somehow managed to find enough ladies, enough cameras, and drum up enough hullabaloo to pull it off. The bad news is, it was still the Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show. The uncategorized news is that Harry Styles was the featured performer, since previously scheduled Katy Perry was deemed an enemy of the state.
Katy Perry Isn’t Performing At The Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show, Because She’s Reportedly Been Banned From China
The upcoming Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show was supposed to be a taste of the Far East that most of us figured would turn into a wildly offensive display of cultural appropriation with the likes of the Hadid sisters strutting down the catwalk in nighties made of fortune cookies or whatever the VS designers could come up with to remind us they’re filming from China. Alas, at the rate they’re going, the only person China will allow in to strut and perform is Taylor Swift (“Mission accomplished!” –Taylor Swift). Continue reading
The strange thing was that everyone wasn’t told to go home as soon as this feathery vision of dusty pink gluh-moore whipped his boa train on the carpet. Why even bother going on with the 2017 CFDA Awards when it was already shut down by an exquisite bejeweled pink ostrich? I’m sure that is a question that fashion professors will ponder with their students for years to come.
The brown-haired, dead-eyed wooden model named Bella Hadid is currently at Cannes. And the other brown-haired, dead-eyed wooden model named Emily RideAJetski is also at Cannes, and at yesterday’s premier of Nelyubov, she dropped massive amounts of black lace under-titty classiness on the red carpet. That’s a whole lot of look, but it’s Cannes! If you’re not delivering a whole lot of look, take your ass to the People’s Choice Awards. Although, since Emily is permanently suffering from a severe case of dehydration, she’d wear this to the People’s Choice Awards too.
It looks like some of the worst trends simultaneously caca’d all over Emily. Underboob? Check! Chichis window? Check! Nude illusion? Check!
On I Love Lucy, Lucy would sometimes wear this glamorous sheer housecoat thing over cigarette pants and it was a perfect vision of elegance, and Emily RideAJetSki’s look is like the NastyDress.com version of that. This is something Sophia Loren would’ve worn back in the day if she was tacky, on a budget and suffered from narcolepsy so she needed a fluffy duvet handy for quick naps.
And just when you thought that Emily RideAJetSki reached the pinnacle of elegance with this look, she faced the front and showed off a crotch seam that looks like a never-ending sparkly landing strip (see: first picture in the gallery and prepare to be hit by the classiness of it all).
Here’s more from the Nelyubov premiere and I also threw in pictures from today’s Okja premiere because I just couldn’t ignore Tilda Swinton looking like a glorious albino alien mother of the bride.
Pics: Backgrid, Wenn.com