HA! This sounds about right. Blame it on Vadge’s influence.

And yes, Brit’s Twitter was hacked.

VIA ONTD

Birthday: ?
Age: ?
Birth Name: Ian Golder

Original Date of HS of the Day: January 3, 2009
Claim to Fame: Ian is the expert of all experts when it comes to boxed mac and cheese. Watching him talk about that shit is like watching me talk about peen. He’s so intense and serious-like about it!

Where is he now? Probably finding legal ways to marry a box of mac and cheese.

Why is he HS of the Week? Because anybody who creams (it’s the cheesiest) their panties this much over processed cheese, deserves this accolade. And also because I went to his website. I am fascinated. I learned so much about him. He also gets a boner for cereal, he has a dog named Goulash, he’s the only person who still uses Geocities to host their website and one of his favorite restaurants in Sacramento is called Pancake Circus. That latter tidbit sealed the deal.

I also learned that some whores eat boxed mac and cheese with sugar and cinnamon. People are really fucking sick!

Becky Romjin and Jerry O’Connell have continued the celebwhore trend of giving their babies woodland creature names.

Becky gave birth to twin girls on December 28th. Becky and Jerry weren’t telling jokes when they said they would name one of their kids Dolly after Dolly Parton. They named one of their girls Dolly Rebecca Rose and the other Charlie Tamara Tulip. Yes, Dolly Rose and Charlie Tulip! I bet they can already play a banjo made out of fish gills, wear the fuck out of a bonnet and dance a jig. Beatrix Potter would be so proud!

Seriously, I don’t mind the name Dolly……..for a cat, a big-tittied legend, a cloned sheep or a sass-talking chipmunk. But not for a baby friend!

And Bronx Mowgli is still shaking his fist in the air, because his place as the poor child with the fugliest baby name is secure!

Source: People

If Tommy Girl was your official woman, there’s only two ways you would spend your days: crying and shopping. Katie must be doing a lot of the former while she’s in NYC. That’s what Page Six Magazine (via Telegraph) claims anyway. They say since Katie landed in New York last July, she’s only taken around $14 million from Tommy’s butt plug fund and has spent.

Apparently, most of the money was spent on real estate. They bought three extra apartments in the building they live in. Two are for Tommy’s ego and the other is for Katie’s tears.

Some source said Katie also spent $13,987 on Suri’s slaves, $7,000 on gym crap, $7,315 on food and $17,000 on rags for her and Suri in six months.

All these numbers seem kind of low ball to me, but now that I think about it, it makes sense. 7 grand may not seem like much for food, but Katie only eats dried-up barley flakes and Tommy nibbles on her soul whenever he gets hungry. And $14k on child care for Suri also seems kind of low budget, but I don’t think we can see most of Suri’s slaves. Thetans can make themselves invisible-like. Besides, Suri doesn’t need them around that often since she spends most of her time looking after Katie. The $7k they spent on gym crap was only for Tommy’s vibrating dirt star slimmer.

It’s the $17k that seems way off! There’s no way any of Katie’s shit rags come from anywhere but the “$1 for 1 pound” pile at the Salvation Army. That said, Katie needs to spend more! If she’s going to terrorize NYC with her weepy zombie face, she better start dropping more alien dollars.

Here’s cheap ass Katie with Suri doing things in NYC yesterday.

This is what I’ve been waiting for! La Pequeña Brit Brit was on my short list along with La Pequeña Spaghetti Cat and La Pequeña Charo. Hearing La Pequeña say “coochie coochie” would make my ass-cooch go into seizures.

La Pequeña went vintage Brit Brit by bumping it to “Baby One More Time” with some help by a couple of dudes called SomePatrolMen. Sadly, Machine didn’t make a cameo as Chester Cheetah.

Yes, this shit is more of La Pequeña humping walls and popping our goose pimples with her “I eat fetuses” grin, but she’s wearing little puffies in her hair! And she kept her crotch berries to herself this time. But only this time!

(Thanks osobuco)

Personally, I’d rather Kim Zolciak’s gutter wig start its own blog, because it holds so many secrets. But I’ll gladly settle for Kim’s blog. Her first post is pretty damn entertaining. She just happened to run into these pictures of her at the beach. I mean, she magically found the pictures of her at the beach while she was at the beach? I’m confuseded. That’s probably how she found her trusted wig friend too. She was walking along the beach in the Bahamas and spotted a pack of rabid dogs attacking the tortured thing. Since Kim has such a giving heart, she took pity on the wig and now the two are inseparable.

Speaking of her wig friend, she is a brave bitch for getting that close to the ocean. I’m sure the lifeguards warned her that the sharks will mistake her wig for a lame seal and try to eat that shit!

Anybitchisbeat, I can’t wait for the future gems Kim’s blog will bring us. We can now enjoy Kim’s fuckery all year long!

I also had to read the comments on this shit, because I knew they would make me laugh until I farted. This is my favorite one and only because they quoted my favorite song at the moment:

You need to go back to your Chili’s clinic and get your saggy ta-ta’s lifted. There’s a tightrope…

There’s a tightrope!

AND it’s pretty poignant that her upcoming appearances section is “coming soon.” Story of her life!

(Thanks Angela)