Birthday Sluts

March 23, 2017 / Posted by:

Chaka Khan (64)
Princess Eugenie of York (27)
Ayesha Curry (28)
Brett Eldredge (31)
Steven Strait (31)
Nicholle Tom (39)
Michelle Monaghan (41)
Keri Russell (41)
Randall Park (43)
Gail Porter (46)
Poe (49)
John Bobbitt (50)
Richard Grieco (52)
Hope Davis (53)
Catherine Keener (58)
Amanda Plummer (60)
Kenneth Cole (63)
Ric Ocasek (68)
Michael Haneke (75)
Joan Crawford (1904-1977)

Pic: @ChakaKhan

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Night Crumbs

March 22, 2017 / Posted by:

Filter-free Trump hater Michael Shannon is reportedly the frontrunner to play Cable in Deadpool.  I know as much about characters in Deadpool as I do about calculus (I failed twice), but I am all about this for two reasons: 1. The shit he’ll say during the promo tour. And 2. The jorts he’ll wear during the promo tour. – Lainey Gossip

Joanna Krupa wanted her followers to know that she looks at views from a hot tub while not wearing a top – Drunken Stepfather

That skirt ScarJo is wearing looks like Queen Kong’s bush from here – Celebitchy

Something productive I did today: Stare at Emily RideAJetSki’s bikini bottom tan lines for 3 seconds – The Nip Slip

Because our TV screens haven’t been infected with enough CyrusesReality Tea

Here’s Megan Fox  in anotherFrederick’s of Hollywood ad where she’s giving you plastic from forehead to toe – Hollywood Tuna

Even U-Haul lesbians are telling Colton Haynes to slow down – Towleroad

The mini Love, Actually sequel still isn’t out yet, but there is a trailer now – Pajiba

Tragedy isn’t just a song by the Bee Gees, it’s also a word that describes the current state of Jessica Biel’s bangs – Popoholic

This baby looks like Ed SheeranOMG Blog

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! – Jezebel

I’m sure this story about Taraji P. Henson fighting with Nia Long on the set of Empire isn’t a shameless stunt to promote tonight’s episode – Just Jared

Chuck Barris has died and now the gong will never ever gong again – SOW

Pic: Wenn.com

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Gwyneth Paltrow Thinks Octopuses Are Too Smart To Eat

March 22, 2017 / Posted by:

Here we go again, Goopy Paltrow is talking about puss, but this time she’s talking about the brilliant sea aliens who are master escape artists. Goopy and Team Goop were having a conversation on Slack about L.A. restaurants when someone recommended the BBQ octopus at a place in Silver Lake. Goopy piped in and said that she’s done with eating octopus because they’re way too smart for humans to eat.

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Ashley Olsen And Her Financier Boyfriend Have Broken Up

March 22, 2017 / Posted by:

Despite it looking like the cover shot of a Nicholas Sparks novel called Daddy Issues, that picture above is actually of Ashley Olsen and her most recent boyfriend on vacation in St. Barts in January. Sadly, there will be no more Caribbean beach PDA for them.

UsWeekly says that after five months of dating, 30-year-old Ashley and 50-something financier Richard Sachs are over. A source tells UsWeekly it ended because she wanted to focus on her clothing line.

The source adds that they’re still friends and “hang out.” For people like you and me, “still hanging out” can mean sending a text at 1am for a half-hearted hook-up. But Ashley and Richard are super rich. So I choose to assume that “still hanging out” means they get together every Tuesday (the gentleman’s Friday) and dare each other to drink unfiltered tap water or ride the subway – no silk gloves! – with the general public.

If life were like a Hallmark movie, this would be the part where a meddling Mary-Kate Olsen takes Ashley aside after throwing a pot roast into the over for dinner, and urges her not to be so career-driven. (Takes long drag off cigarette) “You poor dear. Do you need me to set you up? I hear Jennifer’s grandfather is single!

Pic: Splash

Open Post: Hosted By Zac Efron Giving You Muscle Queen Drag

March 22, 2017 / Posted by:

The newest trailer for Baywatch is out, and it’s more bro-tastic than two muscle dudes in dropped armhole tank tops chest-bumping after a workout in a gym blasting a remix of an LMFAO song by DJ Pauly D. (Yes, that image did things to me and made my nipples shoot out a stream of Monster and vodka.)

The new trailer’s got The Rock blowing shit up, a topless Zac Efron, The Rock lifting heavy things, a topless Zac Efron, Priyanka Chopra being evil, a topless Zac Efron, one of Leonardo DiCatchAHo’s exes trying to act, and Zac Efron serving Real RoidWives of Muscle Beach by doing drag.

Jennifer Lopez better get in as many Instagram photo-ops with A-Rod while she still can. Because as soon as A-Rod sees this trailer, he’s going to bust a nut so strong and powerful that it’ll put a hole in her ceiling. And afterward, A-Rod will dump JLo and skip off to find the muscled-up dream girl in the Baywatch trailer.

Pic: YouTube

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Shia LaBeouf’s Art Installation Returns After A Brief Hiatus

March 22, 2017 / Posted by:

After taking a short break in art piece purgatory, Shia LaBeouf’s anti-Trump art installation HE WILL NOT DIVIDE US is back in business. And just like the last time it was temporarily shut down, it’s once again moving on to a new location.

Not long after Shia and partners, Nastja Säde Rönkkö and Luke Turnermounted a camera outside of the Museum of the Moving Image in Queens, NY, he got arrested and later got into a fight with a Nazi and it was shut down. It was then moved to Albuquerque, NM, where it was shut down after shots were fired in the area. It was then moved to an undisclosed location and replaced simply with a flag. According to the HE WILL NOT DIVIDE US website (via Entertainment Weekly), the project is leaving the U.S. and traveling across the pond to Liverpool, UK.

Apparently people were so divided over the message of Shia’s art project that it had to be divided from the country it was created for. HE WILL NOT DIVIDE US has been adopted by the Foundation for Art and Creative Technology. FACT confirmed the news today on Twitter.

There’s no word on what the UK edition of HE WILL NOT DIVIDE US will entail, like if it will remain a flag or go back to being a mounted camera, or if it will have a uniquely British name like STRICTLY COME DIVIDING. But I have full confidence that HWNDU will be much more successful in the UK. If trashy UK reality shows have taught me anything, it’s that you can always count on British people to bring loads of class and hours of entertainment when you put them in front of a camera.

Pic: Splash

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