Amber Tamblyn And David Cross’ Baby Announcement Contains A Lot Of Fake Names

February 21, 2017 / Posted by:

When 53-year-old David Cross and 33-year-old Amber Tamblyn first announced that they were expecting a baby, they did it in a serious way. Amber slipped the news into a super-serious, pro-Hillary Clinton essay she wrote for Glamour magazine. Amber recently had their baby and instead of getting serious, they announced the news in a funnier way. Specifically by making a joke about their daughter’s “name.

David and I are proud to announce the birth of our daughter, Dauphinoise Petunia Brittany Scheherazade Von Funkinstein Mustard Witch RBG Cross Tamblyn-Bey jr. #TheFutureIsFemale

A post shared by Amber Tamblyn (@amberrosetamblyn) on

That name is obviously fake, because Amber is best friends with Blake Lively. At least four of those eight random words are on Blake’s fancy-sounding future baby names list, and Amber would never steal that many names from her friend. Sure, maybe Mustard was changed from the more elegant Moutarde, but the general idea is still there. Members of the sisterhood of the traveling pants would never.

Although, this is a Hollywood baby born to two wacky hipster parents, which means there is a chance that baby is actually named Dauphinoise Petunia Brittany Scheherazade Von Funkinstein Mustard Witch RBG Cross Tamblyn-Bey Jr. (“Noisey for short!“). If so, the nurse on duty probably didn’t even bat an eye when she filled out their birth certificate. Nurses for famous people have seen it all.

Pic: Splash

Open Post: Hosted By Cate Blanchett Dragging It Up For Charity

February 21, 2017 / Posted by:

If you sniff a ton of wig glue fumes and then tilt your head to the side while squinting, Cate Blanchett in glam drag sort of looks like a skinnier and blond Vida Boheme doing Marlene Dietrich.

Last night, Stonewall in NYC hosted a benefit for Newtown Action Alliance, a nonprofit that was started after the Sandy Hook massacre to promote gun control. The benefit was a drag show and since Cate Blanchett pretty much played a drag queen in Cinderella, she fit right in. Cate is currently starring on Broadway in the play The Present, and she used her night off to lip-synch to Dusty Springfield’s version of You Don’t Own Me for charity.

While wearing a tuxedo jacket, a sparkly bra and chonies, Cate worked the room like a casting director for RuPaul’s Drag Race was in the audience and Logo just announced that next season will be the show’s last.

Cate was also on stage when performer Margeaux Powell did Adele’s Hello.

Yes, Cate gave it and was hot, but she better not get any ideas and audition for the next season of Drag Race. Cate already stole an Oscar from Virginia Madsen, (yes, you heard me right!) and she better not steal the Drag Race crown from a queen who has worked for it her whole life. Don’t do it, Cate!

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Karrueche Tran Claims Chris Brown Threatened To Kill Her, Gets A Restraining Order (UPDATE)

February 21, 2017 / Posted by:

Chris Brown recently let people know he’s an obsessive type of boyfriend who will stalk and harass the women he dates. He also made it clear that once you get with Chris Brown, he will never leave you alone. So none of the following should come as a surprise. TMZ says that Karrueche Tran, who hasn’t been with Chris Brown for almost two years, was granted a restraining order after he allegedly threatened to kill her. For those keeping score at home, this would be the second time a woman has gotten a restraining order against Chris Brown for that reason.

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Hoda Kotb Adopted A Baby

February 21, 2017 / Posted by:

I’ve admitted this several times, but I watch all four hours of Today every weekdaybecause I am grandma. I may be your grandma, but don’t expect me to mail you a crisp $5 bill for your birthday every year.

Anyway, Hoda Kotb hosts the fourth hour with drunk Christian nightingale Kathie Lee Gifford, but for a little while now, she’s been MIA. When it was reported that Megyn Kelly is joining Today and Tamron Hall is leaving, there was a rumor that NBC is trying to become the next Fox News. So I prepared myself for the moment when the fourth hour would open with Kathie Mess Gifford saying, “Please say goodbye to Hoda Woman and welcome my new co-host…Elisabeth Hasselbeck!” But thankfully, Hoda is taking time off because she’s a new mom.

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Adele Says That George Michael’s Family Would Only Allow Her To Perform His Grammy Tribute

February 21, 2017 / Posted by:

During Adele’s tribute to George Michael at the Grammys, she stopped after the first verse of her slowed-down version of Fastlove, and said she had to do it right for him before staring over. Adele was taking that tribute performance very seriously. As it turns out, she was taking it seriously because the family of George Michael specifically wanted her to perform the tribute.

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Lindsay Lohan Says She Was Racially Profiled At The Airport

February 21, 2017 / Posted by:

Lindsay Lohan was on Good Morning Britain today with dried up glob of butt jelly Piers Morgan and she told a story about how she was stopped by an agent at Heathrow in London while trying to catch a flight to New York. No, the agent didn’t stop her because they took one look at her face and believed that she may be The Joker in a bad disguise and is making her way to Gotham City to wreak havoc on it. LiLo says that she was “racially profiled” because of the headscarf she was wearing. And now begins yet another episode of Ginger Wreck, Say What?!

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