Ungrateful Workers At Kensington Palace Threaten To Go On Strike Over A Pay Cut!
Shortly after this picture was taken, Prince William and Duchess Kate flew off to Bora Bora where they spent 9 days resting their wrists in a spa because they strained themselves something bad while holding that umbrella and that clutch.
It’s truly hard to find good help who are grateful that they get to be in the presence of royal greatness and won’t bitch about trivial things like paying their bills and feeding their families. Can you believe that there’s people out there who are lucky enough to work for their future King and yet they’re threatening to strike because they may get a pay cut that’ll put them below a living wage? In THE QUEEN’s day, she would’ve punished those ungrateful peasants by turning them into human leather skin jackets for her Corgis to wear.
Charlie Sheen Says That Crazy “Tiger Blood” Time In His Life Was Caused By Testosterone Cream
“Yeah, okay…” said drugs. No. It totally wasn’t drugs. At least according to Charlie Sheen it wasn’t. So, remember way way back to 2011 when Charlie Sheen was at peak-Charlie Sheen? When he was fucking piles of porn stars and ranting like a crack-smoking subway cockroach about winning and warlocks and tiger blood pumping through his veins? It doesn’t take the wisdom of the Cartoon All-Stars to assume that Crazy Unky Chuck had been snorting everything under his kitchen sink. But apparently that wasn’t the case. The real culprit? Testosterone cream.
Page Six says Charlie is once again talking to his new BFF Dr. Oz on Wednesday, this time about what made him such a mess five years ago. They also discussed Charlie’s recent rage out when he called his ex-wife Denise Richards a “puss wart” via a text sent to their daughter and threatened to kill them. Apparently all that anger comes from having too many jacked-up male hormones running around in his system.
“It was a lot of highs and lows. I was taking a lot of testosterone cream, and I think I went too far with it. It was kind of like a borderline…not a ‘roid rage, but a ‘roid disengage.”
Since the only cream I’m familiar with is the kind you spray into your mouth from a can, I had to look up what the hell testosterone cream was. Apparently it’s used for dudes who need to increase their testosterone levels. Okay, I’m no medical professional, but even I know that shit should come with a warning that says “Do NOT apply directly to Charlie Sheen.”
Pic: Sony Pictures Television
Paz de la Huerta’s Lawyers Spit Up Video Of The Stunt-Gone-Wrong That Messed With Her Career (UPDATE)
The Oscars are this Sunday and we should be hearing the words, “….And the Oscar for Best Actress goes to… It’s a five-way tie! Paz de la Huerta for Room! Paz de la Huerta for Brooklyn! Paz de la Huerta for Joy! Paz de la Huerta for Carol! And Paz de la Huerta for 45 Years!” But that’s not going to happen and it’s all because of an accident on the set of Nurse 3D that left Paz de la Huerta with busted bones and a broken spirit. Bitches need to pay for this and Paz de la Huerta is making sure that they do.
Last July, I wrote about how the dew drop sitting on an orchid’s petal filed a $55 million breach of contract lawsuit against Lionsgate for not properly keeping her safe while shooting stunts. While shooting a scene in October 2011 in Toronto, Paz and her co-star Katrina Bowden walked into the street when an ambulance driven by a stunt artist (whose name is probably Caitlyn Jenner) drove by and hit her, sending her body to the ground. The accident left Paz in a bad way with a broken tailbone and a spinal fracture. Paz had to press pause on her acting career, because she had to go through 20 surgeries and she’s still not right. Paz blames producers for not doing a proper stunt walkthrough and not letting her know in detail what the stunt was going to be.
Azealia Banks Has Thoughts On RiRi’s New Videos (Hint: She Hates Them)
As if I really needed to even give you a hint. Of COURSE she hates them! There’s a long-ass list of things that set Azealia Banks off every time she thinks about them: security guards, flight attendants, Iggy Azalea, America (nothing in particular, just America in general). And now it looks like it’s time to get out our pens and add another couple items to that list.
Watching Rihanna grease up Wheelchair Jimmy’s emergency brake with her booty sweat and twirl around with her nipples out (aka the seven-and-a-half minutes worth of music video for “Work”) didn’t do much for most of us than make us wonder where RiRi got that hot see-through glitter tank top. But not Azealia; she got fired up and took it to Twitter. Azealia opened by tweeting (and later deleting) that “Work” was a $2 yard sale version of Beyonce’s “Baby Boy.” Azealia was then probably worried about receiving an angry cease-and-desist from Tidal, so she decided to keep it a bit more vague with her follow-up hate:
Music is honestly so fucking trash and boring. Let's start a fucking beef and make shit interesting
— AZEALIABANKS (@AZEALIABANKS) February 22, 2016
all these fucking pill popping divas doing the LEAST and the shit is boring. Get these hoes a coffee and a pair of boxing gloves
— AZEALIABANKS (@AZEALIABANKS) February 22, 2016
Bring out the real artists !!!!!
— AZEALIABANKS (@AZEALIABANKS) February 22, 2016
If you’re going to drag a bunch of pill-popping divas, at least have the shady bitch decency to name names, Azealia! Ugh, so inconsiderate. If Azealia ever decides to get out of the lucrative high-stakes world of…whatever she’s currently doing to pay the bills, I think a logical move would be to get into music reviews. I’d love to hear her review anything, really. “Minions cereal is fucking trash. It tastes like rotten bananas that were pulled from Oscar the Grouch’s crusty asshole.” Here’s two of the music industry’s mediocre finest (according to Azealia) leaving a club in London early this morning followed by the Kardashian with the most legitimate reason for filing income taxes, Kendall Jenner.
The CAPTION THIS Contest WINNERS For February 22nd!
You don’t have to be lonely at TatersOnly.com – skabazzle
Upvote winner:
eFarmony profile. – FluffKitteh
Pic: Break
Hot Slut Of The Day!
The classic black torchiere lamp, the crown jewel of elegance of any home it’s in!
If you’re a human who has at least one milliounce of taste, there’s a good chance that you’ve either owned or still own a tall, skinny lamp of lit elegance. In the 80s and 90s, it felt like everyone had a black torchiere lamp in their house. Every refined store from KMart to Ikea sold them. My mom got one with her devastatingly exquisite black lacquered and gold bedroom set, and to me, it was the star of our house for a while. My mom put it in our living room where I spent hours upon hours playing with it. Those were the days when a damn floor lamp was entertainment.
My friends and I used to lip-synch to songs in my living room, and sometimes we’d get super theatrical by closing the drapes to make the room as dark as possible. Then as one of us lip-synched for our lives, another one of us tilted the classic black torchiere and used it as a spotlight. It had a dimmer on it, so we could make the scene extra dramático by fading in and out. Our production values were basically better than that Lip Sync Battle show.
When I moved out of the house, my mom got rid of it (GASP! I know) and I hope that it went on to become a make-shift spotlight for some other young gay. If my dog’s legs were long enough to operate a make-shift spotlight, I’d run to KMart and get a classic black torchiere right away, because my solo lip-synching living room performances are missing that touch of thi-turr.
Pic: HardwareStore.com