Eva’s Baby Ban

July 11, 2007 / Posted by:
Desperate Housewives executive producer, Marc Cherry, has reportedly banned Eva Longoria from having babies for at least a year, because he thinks she'll make a terrible mother. NO, according to reports Marc hasn't written a pregnancy into the DH storyline.
Eva told OK! Magazine that she's ok with the ban. "We're fine with that. We want to spend some time with each other, even though we want kids very much."
Well sweetie, kids don't want you! Eva and Tony Parker are currently in OK!  showing off what $2 million bought the magazine.

Booby Prize

July 11, 2007 / Posted by:
Jessica Levine of Florida was the proud winner of a new pair of tits thanks to MyFreeImplants.com . Jessica was the lucky girl out of hundreds of women who entered a random drawing. The check was given to Jessica on the last day of the Erotica-LA convention and presented by Jenna Jameson.
The 28-year-old will use the money to take her size B cup to a size D.
She said, "Thank you MyFreeImplants.com, I can't believe I'm getting a new set of boobs, I am so excited. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you."
MyFreeImplants.com is doing good things for the women of this world. They said, "We're trying to do big things and no one is bigger than Jenna. Having her on board with our cause gives us that much more energy to keep fighting for small breasted women all around the world."
The site is like MySpace for chicks who want free tits.
$5k for tits?! Every chick I've known that has gotten a new pair paid a minimum of $9k. Bootleg boob job!  

Two Girls In Love

July 11, 2007 / Posted by:
Star Magazine reports that super-lesbionic messages between Lindsay Lohan and Samantha Ronson have been leaked from her MySpace account. Blohan apparently used her MySpace account to stay in touch with friends and family while in rehab. She's still in rehab. Star claims that one of her 75 MySpace friends gave the magazine access. Star found a gorgeous lesbian letter she wrote to Ronson.
Details of the affectionate correspondence appear under the headline, "Lindsay's Lesbian Love Letters!"

Lohan allegedly tells Ronson: "Babe, if I don't have you in my life then I should just go die. … I want to marry you and have children with you."

Apparently Lindsay isn't fussy about who changes her name.

"Go to bed babe," she wrote to her pal late one night.

"I love you. – [signed] Lindsay Ronson."

That is so beautiful and so poetic. SamRon is fugly fug as a girl, but she'd make a hot boy. She should pull a Brandon Teena and make the change. I'd get with that.




She’s Lying

July 11, 2007 / Posted by:
Charlie Sheen is engaged to his girlfriend of more than a year, real estate investor, Brooke Mueller. He's 41 and she's 29. Denise Richards was asked about the engagement and she had nothing but nice things to say. She was probably clenching her jaw the entire time.
She said, "I am genuinely happy for the two of them. In fact, I sent them flowers to congratulate them both. I've spent time with her, and my girls really like her. That's all that matters to me." 
Denise was recently dumped by Richie Sambora in Hawaii. She also denies that she paid a match maker $50k to help her find a man. Poor Denise!
She may be unlucky in love, but she says hot things. I watched some red carpet interview with her on Access Hollywood or something where they asked her about love advice and she said "I'm the wrong person to give advice. I stole my best friend's husband!"
That bitch is hot.

Why Not? They’ve Already Effed Up Everything Else!

July 11, 2007 / Posted by:
Tanned twinkie, Zac Efron, will star in a remake of the 1984 film "Footloose." Zac will play Ren McCormack, the rebel newcomer to a town that has banned dancing. Kevin Bacon originally played the role over 20 years ago. 
The film has already been ruined by Broadway after being turned into a full-fledged musical. The plans are to bring that version the big-screen.
Zac is currently in Hairspray the movie. Basically Zac is becoming the Prince ruined classics.
Why do chicks think this dude is hot? He looks like Ellen Degeneres!  
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Richie Won’t Be In Court Today

July 11, 2007 / Posted by:
Nicole Richie is reportedly in Canada with her alleged baby-daddy and overall douche, Joel Madden. She will have to decide to accept a plea deal or not offered by prosecutors. The terms of the deal are unknown. Nicole is not required to be in court, because it's a misdemeanor charge. Her attorney will appear and decide whether or not to take the deal.
If she doesn't take the deal, her attorney will try and get the trial pushed back again, because their expert witness can't testify until August.
TMZ reports that Nicole thinks the drug test given to her by the cops at the time of her arrest was bogus and she's bringing in her own witness to prove it. Um…didn't she admit to taking drugs?! How the hell could her own mouth be wrong?
Take the deal Nicole, so we can be done with this hell! But she won't. Anything to keep herself in the spotlight for a few more weeks. I mean it's not like she has anything else to do. Seriously, what DOES she do?!  

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