Mad Mel’s Going To Be Somebody’s Father For The 9th Time
Catholic Mel Gibson once again summoned side-eyes from strict Catholic abuelitas everywhere by making a baby with a woman he isn’t married to. 60-year-old Mad Mel’s angry grizzly man jizz knocked up his 26-year-old equestrian vaulter/aspiring screenwriter girlfriend of 2 years Rosalind Ross. Rosalind will pop out the latest member of Mad Mel’s child army early next year. Mel’s rep confirmed the news to People. All of the 60-something people I know or have known want to spend their days burping themselves after their 6th beer and they don’t want to spend their days burping a baby. But a source tells People that Mad Mel can’t wait for his new baby to show up.
“Mel and Rose are so excited about the baby. Mel loves being a dad and he and Rose can’t wait to be parents together. The last two years have been some of his happiest years he’s ever had.”
Mad Mel has 7 kids with his ex-wife Robyn Moore, and as everyone knows, he has an almost-7-year-old daughter with Oksana Grigorieva. Mel’s oldest is 36. His knocked-up piece is younger than 5 of his 8 kids.
And before every family court judge in Los Angeles left for the weekend, they got together and took bets as to how long before Rosalind and Mad Mel are in one their court rooms fighting over child support money. They all probably bet around 6 months, but they’re hoping the answer is never, because they really don’t want to hear another recording of Mel scream-whining about how Rosalind needs to blow him as he pours gasoline on the floor.
Pic: Wenn.com
Marky Mark’s Request For A Pardon Has Been Dropped
You don’t have to look much farther than Marky Mark’s Wikipedia page to know that he did some vile shit before he hooked up with the Funky Bunch and stripped down to his underwear. Mahky Mahk attacked two Vietnamese men on the same day in Boston when he was 16. He ended up being charged with assault and served 45 days. Two years ago, Mark tried to get a pardon for those heinous acts he committed. He must have been too busy teaching Donnie Wahlberg how to flip the Wahlburgers properly, because he forgot about that pardon. And now it’s been dropped.
Open Post: Hosted By Jessica Lange As Joan Crawford
The gay television event of 2017, Feud, has already started shooting in Los Angeles, and the paps got the first pictures of Jessica Lange in full Joan Crawford drag while filming scenes with Reed Diamond. In case you’re some kind of weirdo who hasn’t kept track of every detail of this soon-to-be masterpiece, Feud is about the bitch battle royale that Joan Crawford and Bette Davis got into while making What Ever Happened to Baby Jane? Susan Sarandon is playing Bette Davis and Catherine Zeta-Jones is playing Olivia de Havilland. As for Jessica Lange as Joan Crawford….
I don’t know. My eyes aren’t really seeing Joan Crawford. They’re mostly seeing Jessica Lange as Shirley MacLaine in My Geisha. That eyebrow situation should be so bold that when I look at it, it should punch me in the eyeballs and leave me seeing brow-shaped floaters for the next 3 hours. That eyebrow situation is barely lightly flicking me in the eyes. Joan Crawford’s glorious eyebrows were so hairy and thick that the people around her could barely speak, because when they weren’t spitting out brow hairs, they were choking on the paint fumes wafting off of her face.
Ryan Murphy should bring in Alyssa Edwards, who played Joan Crawford twice on RuPaul’s Drag Race this season, to be a makeup consultant. Because Alyssa Edwards truly captured Joan Crawford’s essence.
And that is a screen shot of Alyssa working one of Joan’s more casual daytime looks. Maybe the producers of Feud know that there’s not enough Sharpies in the country to fully recreate Joan Crawford’s perfect brows so they’re going to CGI them in during post-production. I’m going with that.
Pics: Wenn.com
Nick Gordon Didn’t Bother Showing Up To Court, So A Judge Found Him Responsible In Bobbi Kristina Brown’s Death
The estate of Bobbi Kristina Brown sued her boyfriend/adopted brother Nick Gordon last year for allegedly scheming to get her money and being responsible for her death. The lawsuit claimed that Nick pulled some ice cold cunt stunts like transferring money from Bobbi Kristina’s account to his own the day she went into a coma. The day Bobbi Kristina was found unresponsive in a bathtub, she got into a fight with Nick and was supposed to meet up with a friend to talk about his alleged violent ways. Nick was also accused of injecting Bobbi Kristina with a “toxic mixture” that day. Nick’s lawyers spit on the lawsuit by calling it “meritless,” but he never got to tell the court in Atlanta, GA why it was meritless, because he was a no-show twice. That cost him the case.
Marc Jacobs Isn’t Sorry For Putting His Models In Dreadlocks
Marc Jacobs recently presented a fashion show at NYFW, and as we learned yesterday, he sent his models down the runway looking like a bunch of sorority girls who all decided to go to Sigma Phi’s Funkadelic mixer as George Clinton. Every model wore piles of wool dreadlocks that Marc bought from an Etsy store. Marc explained that the look was inspired by Lana Wachowski. Not surprisingly, this didn’t sit well with some people, and it wasn’t long before Marc Jacobs was accused of appropriating black culture. Marc decided to respond to the people who weren’t feeling it, and he let them know it’s he who isn’t feeling them.
Behold, Corey Feldman Giving The Performance Of His Career!
Corey Feldman is a human fountain of HIGH ART and he’s already gifted the world with masterpieces like his museum-worthy video for Ascension Millennium and the MS Paint-made cover for his double-album Angelic 2 The Core. But he somehow found a way to outdo himself in a Today Show performance that made people cringe so much that they have a new field of wrinkles on their face. They obviously cringed over the fact that they will never have the skills to swirl out the kind of flaming hot moves that Corey Feldman swirled out this morning.