The CAPTION THIS Contest WINNER For January 27th!

January 28, 2011 / Posted by:

Stevie Wonder has them too, they’re curb feelers. – OurMissC

Runners-up:

The upshot is that she never has any trouble getting the last little bit of peanutbutter out of the jar. – citizenstrange

Even her toenails are running away from them ugly ass Birkenstocks. – sugar free

Nightmare in Walmart: Pedi Krueger – Emeriesan

via POW

Hot Slut Of The Day!

January 28, 2011 / Posted by:

Gino D’Acampo who vowed to cook with his cock out if ITV’s This Morning won The National Television Award. Well, they did, so Gino followed through with his promise and cooked up a plate of hot meat while only wearing an apron and an Italian cock sock (which Vinny from Jersey Shore uses as peen head warmer). When the hosts complained to Gino that it wasn’t fair for him to wear an apron, he ripped that off before removing his peen blocker. And then he cooked! Clip below contains a small dose of breaded nalgas so it’s a little NSFW:

I prefer my gammon with a pinch of Italian butt hair anyway, so Gino should always be nekkid he when cooks that dish up. But it still could use a side of Italian sausage and two prunes for garnish.

Note to Guy Fieri: Don’t get ANY ideas. The Food Network would like to keep their A on the door. I would add drunk ass Sandra Lee to that note, but it’s inevitable that she’ll down too many melted Otter Pops and vodkas during one taping and pull some First Ladies Gone Wild shit.

via Daily Mail

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Birthday Sluts

January 28, 2011 / Posted by:

Joey Fatone (34)
Ariel Winter (13)
Nick Carter (31)
Elijah Wood (30)
Rosamund Pike (32)
Rick Ross (34)
Mo Rocca (42)
Kathryn Morris (42)
DJ Muggs (43)
Sarah McLachlan (43)
Keith Hamilton Cobb (49)
Frank Darabont (52)
Nicolas Sarkozy (56)
Barbi Benton (61)
Alan Alda (75)

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Porn Stars & Bricks Of Coke: Just A Regular Night For Charlie Sheen

January 27, 2011 / Posted by:

Charlie Sheen is still in the hospital with stomach problems (acokecitis or extra-large cokestones) and more details are coming out about his 24-hour porn star party fueled by booze and the bad shit. Let’s start with the porn stars. 22-year-old Kacey Jordan reportedly Tweeted this picture (click here if you want to see the NSFW labia Charlie probably did lines off of) of her peek-a-boo pussy while spending time at Charlie’s house yesterday afternoon. It’s nice to see that Charlie gargles his urethra out with mouthwash and Lysol wipes his perma-soft dick before slapping it on a porn star’s forehead. Charlie should host a show called “How Clean Is Your Ho?” when he gets out of the hospital.

Radar reports that Kacey wasn’t the only porn star at Charlie’s party. 19-year-old Melanie Rios was with Charlie this morning when his stomach convulsed and tried to escape out of his asshole. Melanie left Charlie’s house right after he was taken to the hospital. Now on to the bad shit….

Someone who was at Charlie’s house last night tells TMZ that during his 36-hour booze and bagina binge party, a dealer showed up with a briefcase full of cocaine. Who knows how many bricks of Lohan powder Charlie picked up, but the source says that he started snorting that shit up his nostrils almost immediately. This might’ve been the silver bullet that fucked up Charlie’s insides. TMZ also reports that doctors have diagnosed Charlie with a hiatal hernia. They don’t think he overdosed, but one of the causes of a hiatal hernia is cocaine use. One of the causes is also “straining” and you know that motherfucker uses every muscle and nerve in his body to try to make a whisper of a boner. Bitch pushes so hard that instead of making a hard thing come up in the front, he makes a hard thing come out of the back. Not a good look.

So to recap, TMZ claims that Charlie didn’t OD and is simply suffering from a hernia he’s had for years. Charlie drank enough booze to keep one of my family reunions going for at least 2 hours, snorted half of Scarface and dry humped on several porn stars for hours. But yet it’s only a hernia that put him out? Damn, I guess they better start slapping “WARNING: Lift with Care” labels on vodka bottles, cocaine bricks and porn stars.

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Blind Items: I Guess, You Guess

January 27, 2011 / Posted by:

It will be baby season soon, and you can expect a lot of stars to add to their families in the upcoming months! This group includes a very famous actress, who we hear is expecting a little bundle of joy. No, she hasn’t announced it publicly yet, but she is already making preparations, including the selection of a name. If everything goes as planned, she will be naming the baby after an equally famous celebrity with whom she is good friends (but it’s not the celebrity you expect) . The name is actually very nice, and it fits in well with the actress’ family. Despite that, we hope she reconsiders before the baby arrives. If she doesn’t, she is in for a rude awakening the first time she Googles the baby’s name for news or photos. Why? Because it’s the same name as that of not-very-famous porn actress. (Blind Gossip)

Jennifer Aniston has already denied that she’s adopting a Mexican baby, but I’m going to go with her anyway. And I’m still guessing her ass even though I couldn’t find any porn stars named Chelsea Aniston, Courtney Aniston, Beanie Baby Aniston or Entenmann’s Aniston.

Then again, this could also be Reese Witherspoon and Jim Toth? There is a Playboy model named Tiffany Toth. Reese Witherspoon and Tiffany are friends?!

What former very high B list movie actress who is now the answer to one messed up career via booze and drugs is at Fashion Week in Paris where she had a threesome with this long time A list movie actress and her celebrity boyfriend. I wonder if she charged the guy. I bet she thought about it. (CDAN)

Tara Reid is in Paris with her new boyfriend, and so is Diane Kruger and Joshua Jackson. Joshua’s got that Dawson’s Creek money so Tara should’ve invoiced his ass.

We’re getting lots of good Blinds from our Sundance source this year. Our source has another interesting piece of info about the Olympian we told you about earlier. This time, she claims that whenever he and his ‘crew’ are in Vegas partying at a famous club the athlete only tips 2% of his bill. The owner of the club is very frustrated with him and has told the servers to avoid his table when he comes in. He expects freebies and gives very little for what he gets. (BuzzFoto)

Dick Button! Of course. (It’s not Dick Button).

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Afternoon Crumbs

January 27, 2011 / Posted by:

Ozzy Osbourne (or maybe that’s Lynne from The Real Housewives of Orange County) trying to resists the urge to bite the head off of that precious dove next to him – TDW

Who the hell is supposedly motorboating ScarJo today? – Lainey Gossip

On a positive note, those flowers behind Katie Holmes look alive and pretty – The Superficial

The Old Spice Guy is back – Towleroad

Ryan Seacrest’s neck shrunk, but his eyebrows are forever – The Berry

Michael Lohan and Lindsay Lohan have way more in common than we think, so says Kate Major (site NSFW) – Drunken Stepfather

When you’re Charlie Sheen, you don’t need to update your stupid Facebook status. That’s what TMZ is for – Celebitchy

Holly Madison’s got Marilyn Monroe on her tits – Hollywood Tuna

Nicky Hilton needs to never dress like Bobby Trendy again – Popoholic

Willow Smith in Vanity Fair – Just Jared

Is that Tiger Woods behind Cameron Diaz? – Popsugar

What does Brandy have against elephant face dicks? – ICYDK

We’re arguing about the damn everything bagel now – OMG Blog

Demi Lovato is getting out of rehab next week – I’m Not Obsessed

Alesha Dixon is the portrait of greasy elegance – Moe Jackson

I just want to rip this cover of Seventeen into a hundred pieces and mosaic an end table with it – Go Fug Yourself

Kendra. Lezzie. Sex. Tape. Blah. – Popbytes

This looks delicious – Cityrag

Methinks MiserAlba inhaled too much of Kate Moss’ coke fumes – Hollywood Rag


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