Elizabeth Taylor Can’t Say “Daddy” Without Sounding Like a Hooker

May 4, 2007 / Posted by:
Elizabeth Taylor was chosen by Matt Groening and company to utter the first words for Baby Maggie Simpson on "The Simpsons." Elizabeth was asked to only say "Daddy."
Matt said that they did 25 takes of it and they couldn't get Liz to say it without sounding so sexy. He said when they told her to tone it down she said "FUCK YOU" and walked out. Damn, that woman is so hot.  I'm assuming she was able to walk back then, because it would've been very awkward if she was in a wheelchair. It's hard to stage dramatic exits when you're in a wheelchair. 
Matt also said that Prince wanted to do the show, but he didn't like the script they wrote for him. He wanted to use a script his driver wrote. Oh, Hollywood!
Matt is spilling the beans on funny stories to celebrate the 400th episode of the show as well as the feature film which hits this Summer.
Source: NYDN

The Messiah Stands!!!!!!

May 4, 2007 / Posted by:
OMG!!!!! BREAKING NEWS!!!! STOP YOUR POOPING!!!! Shiloh Nouvel Jolie-Pitt is standing up!!!! She is just on step closer to saving the World!
Anyway, here's Bradley and Shiloh spending some quality time in Prague. I read some newspaper that proclaimed "Shiloh's Walking!" and I don't see any walking, just standing. Lazy. Maddox taught her well.  
Source: JJB

Liv Tyler is the New Jennifer Connelly

May 4, 2007 / Posted by:
Liv Tyler will play Betty Ross in the new Incredible Hulk movie which stars Edward Norton in the title role. The first film starred Jennifer Connelly as Betty.
Betty is Dr. Bruce Banner's co-worker and love interest. The second movie will start with Betty estranged from Bruce, but when hos around the world try to kill the Hulk, Betty gets swept back into his world.
Shooting is set begin this Summer in Toronto with a straight-to-DVD 2008 release. 
Instead of posting some boring picture of Liv, I found this shoe store in Shanghai named after her ass. That looks like a low-rent Payless. I wonder how many stores around the World are named after celebrities. I so want to go to the Lindsay Lohan snow cone shop.
Source: Coming Soon

Jada Pinkett is LYING

May 4, 2007 / Posted by:
Jada Pinkett Smith told People Magazine that contrary to what everyone thinks, Katie Holmes is in charge of the TomKat family. Jada basically goes on and on and on defending TomKat. She goes on so much that she should just turn it into a novel, because it's FICTION. Here's some key points Jada lied talked about:
People don't know that behind all that grace is a tiger. I've witnessed it! I've had conversations with Kate personally where the tigress comes out of her, that fight. 
It burns my soul – I see her in the house with Tom; he doesn't have that on her! It kills me. 'Tom's this monster and he's got her chained up in the basement and he's forcing Scientology down her throat' – it's bulls—. Let me tell you: Kate ain't no little wimpy kitty cat. It's not that ballgame. For real.
Please stop lying Jada. Please! Your soul is burning, because you are telling LIES!!!
He's taking time off to just be with [Katie] on her routine. [Holmes is filming Mad Money in Louisiana.] It's nice when our husbands take the time to come with us to work. I saw him the other day, he had Suri by himself. He had Suri for like four days. By himself. He's a family guy as well as this larger-than-life individual. He knows, more than anything, that for him to be happy, he's got to have a happy home and a happy family.
Jada please! Jesus doesn't like liars! Just don't do it. 
Tom don't run nothin' in that house! It is Katie's house. It's her world! The devotion that Tom has to his wife, and the places he'll go to make her happy – spiritually, where he will go as a man for his woman. 
What the hell does Tom have over Jada? Maybe he has proof that she likes to eat the cat and he's going to expose her ass if she doesn't worship the TomKat? That's my only guess.


May 4, 2007 / Posted by:
Bruce Willis said that the above photographer he took with Vanity Fair wasn't hard at all. He said that he has no problem seeing his old wife, Demi Moore, "canoodling" with her new husband, Ashton Kutcher. The picture was taken in the Caribbean on just one of many family vacays. 
The picture was taken by Annie Leibovitz.
Whatever works for them, but that picture is a little bit creepy. Like Demi and Ashton are trying so hard to look happy. Bruce should've pushed both their asses into the water!  
Source: Daily Mail

Kelly Clarkson’s Album Might Suck Hardcore

May 4, 2007 / Posted by:
Rumors are that Kelly Clarkson's album has been completed dumped after the label hated it. Sony head honcho, Clive Davis, told her ass of when he heard it.
An inside source said, "It was an extraordinary presentation. Clive was absolutely merciless in his criticism of Kelly. She's one of the biggest priorities on the label and her new songs were savaged."
Kelly's last album "Breakaway" was a huge hit for the label almost 2 years ago. Her single "Never Again" is currently out and it sucks bad. She's supposed to start touring this Summer in support of the new album.
Since when do major labels care about the quality of music? They just want to make a quick buck. This album is going to come out and they are probably going to sprinkle it with glitter to try cover up how awful it is.  

The CAPTION THIS Contest WINNER for May 3rd!!!

May 4, 2007 / Posted by:
Like what you see? Buy the tape! Send a check or money order to:
Tanya Harding School of Moves
69 Toofless Way
Trailertown, KY 24652 – TwoDrinkMin
Britney is now on the next part of her comeback tour: middle schools and kindergartens. – Nanners 
Yet another middle shcool teacher seduces her students. – pnutmn 
Thanks Jessica

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