David Letterman IS SO HOT

September 29, 2007 / Posted by:

Parasite Hilton was on David Letterman last night and he seriously grilled her ass. Paris once again switched from her deep voice to her baby voice, because bitch is insane. For most of the interview Dave kept asking her about jail and she finally said she didn’t want to talk about it anymore, because she’s moved on. Dave then basically tells her it’s the most interesting thing about her. At that point an audience member shouts “I Love You Paris!” and she blows a kiss to him. Without skipping a beat Dave responds with, “Did you meet him in prison?”

Paris then whines and does a stupid pout and tells David not to not make her regret coming on.

On Wednesday I posted about how Paris apparently burst into tears after the show (it taped on Tuesday). Her people told Dave’s people she will never do his show again.

Dave is fucking right. The most interesting thing about this skank is her whole jail saga. Nobody cares about her perfume, clothing line or stupid movie! Even when she talks about her new movie the audience starts laughing at her ass! This bitch needs to check herself and realize she’s a joke and always will be. She’s made a lot of money being the joke and there’s nothing wrong with that.

Dave forever!!!!

Thanks Emily

I’m Sorry For Every Bad Thing I Said About You, Scientology

September 29, 2007 / Posted by:
 
David Hans Schmidt was the dude that tried to extort $1 million from Tom Cruise in exchange for stolen photos of Tom's wedding to that robot lady thing. Well, David was found dead inside his shower in his Phoenix condo yesterday afternoon. He apparently hung himself, but well….I'm not saying.
 
David was on house arrest and facing up to two years in the clink for trying to eff with Tommy Girl. David also brokered the Screech sex tape, the Tonya Harding sex tape, the Paula Jones nude photos and the Colin Farrell sex tape. He was 47. 
 
Gulp! I'm going to end this post by saying Scientology is a beautiful thing and Tom Cruise is a God. We should all learn the beliefs of the aliens. They can teach us a lot. We all should give all of our dough to Xenu or whatever alien creature they worship. Just don't take me Xenu….please!!!!! 
 
 
 
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So Natural

September 29, 2007 / Posted by:
 
Xtina! Pregnancy is really bringing out your natural glow. Your skin looks like the perfect shade of tangerine. Your eyes look like two blobs of coal on an orange snowman. Your lips are the perfect shade of period blood. You are truly a natural beauty.  
 
Here's Xtina and her hunk of a husband at  Magnolia in L.A. yesterday. Do you think they play "The Wizard of Oz" in bed? Jordy would make the perfect flying monkey. Seriously. It kind of makes me want to put on my Dorothy costume and take a broom…I'll stop.
 
 
 
 
 
 

MUTE

September 29, 2007 / Posted by:
 
JLo and Skeletor opened their "El Concierto Del Messo" tour in Atlantic City, NJ last night. I can't even hear them and my ears are already bleeding. Concert organizers should find a way to put JLo on mute. I mean listening to her sing live should be strictly optional. Hopefully they had some mercy and made her ass lip-synch.  Well, not her ass, but her mouth. Her ass probably sings better than her. You know that thing can blow!
 
Oh and Cher called. She really wants her wardrobe back. She's going to auction it off next week.  
 

 

 
 

 

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