Birthday Sluts

January 15, 2011 / Posted by:

María del Rosario Pilar Martínez Molina Gutiérrez de los Perales Santa Ana Romanguera y de la Hinojosa Rasten (aka Charo) (60)
Howie Day (30)
Pitbull (30)
Young Dro (32)
Eddie Cahill (33)
Regina King (40)
Chad Lowe (43)
Lisa Lisa (44)
James Nesbitt (46)
Mario Van Peebles (54)
Andrea Martin (64)
Princess Michael of Kent (66)

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Blind Items: I Guess, You Guess

January 14, 2011 / Posted by:

Which member of the Glee cast was partying over the holidays on Boracay island in the Philippines and managed to mistakenly pull a ladyboy? (Popbitch)

Puck was in the Philippines during the holidays, so he’s the obvious guess. But I do like the image of Jane Lynch literally pulling a delicate Filipino flower by the hand across the beach.

Which Real Housewife ( in a city currently airing) enjoys a little wake me up cocaine every morning. (CDAN)

Giggy from Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, obviously. He used to do lines off of Cedric’s abs.

Although all the women who announced they were pregnant in the past two weeks all have boyfriends or husbands, one of the women is unsure if it is said boyfriend/husband or the guy she was cheating with. (CDAN)

YES! I just knew Maury would eventually make a cameo in this latest Hollywood Babypalooza. And my official guess is Kate Hudson?

This actor has been under a lot of scrutiny about his sexuality. While he has been keeping a very low public profile (with the exception of a magazine cover here or there), he isn’t exactly sitting at home with the wife and kids night after night. In fact, he recently made an appearance at a WeHo gay bar with some male friends. They were swigging down drinks and cracking jokes about a certain organization to which he belongs. No, the organization is not The Hair Club for Men. (Blind Gossip)

Drink that Xenutini like you don’t give a fuck, John Travolta!

This award-winning actress has done lots of film and television. Her focus right now, however, is on her weight (which is higher than it was at her career peak). She wants to get back into the spotlight so badly that she is finally circling the dreaded gastric bypass surgery. There’s an interesting twist to this plan. She is talking about having the surgery and recovery filmed for a reality show. Barring any surprises, this should happen within the next year. (Blind Gossip)

Like this is anybody but Kirstie Alley? Can they also put a band around her lips? No, I don’t mean that. Then how is she going to whistle for her own new bikini body when she debuts it on Oprah…again?

This B list East Coast rapper might sing about the ladies, surround himself with the ladies and brag about his conquests, but the truth is – he’s a virgin. He’s not gay, but has no interest in having actual sex with women, he’s just interested in the perception that he is. (BuzzFoto)

Drake is from Toronto and that counts as East Coast, right?

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Zsa Zsa Gabor Loses Most Of Her Leg

January 14, 2011 / Posted by:

Just start pouring bottles of Andre directly into my mouth hole, because it’s a sad day. After two weeks of doctors trying to do everything they can to save Zsa Zsa Gabor’s ultra graceful leg, they sadly had to amputate most it starting from just above the knee. Zsa Zsa checked into UCLA Medical Center around New Year’s Day after her personal doctor found the bitchiest blood clot of all blood clots in leg. Doctors put her on a shit load of antibiotics, but it was too late.

The good news is that Zsa Zsa did fine during the surgery and her doctors are optimistic that she’ll heal without any major problems. Since Zsa Zsa is 93-years-old, she will stay in the hospital for a little while longer so doctors can monitor her recovery closely.

I’m sure that Zsa Zsa’s place on the chandelier of life will twinkle brightly long after ours goes dim. Zsa Zsa will live forever! I’m also sure that Zsa Zsa will look better than ever in her solid gold prosthetic leg with built-in marabou slipper. Dahlink!

via TMZ

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Afternoon Crumbs

January 14, 2011 / Posted by:

Kim Kardashian Tweeted this picture of herself to remind all of us that a silica gel packet is more natural than she is – Popoholic

The always gorgeous Carole Bayer Sager and Nicole Kidman at a Botox convention together – Lainey Gossip

I take it back. Hollywood doesn’t have shit on Frayser High School – NYC Barstool Sports

Unlike Spider-Man, Captain America’s bulge came to play – Towleroad

Aubrey O’Day accessorizes her bulging breasts with bulging eyes – Hollywood Tuna

Speaking of tits ‘o plenty (site NSFW) – Drunken Stepfather

Your wet dreams of seeing Carrie Fisher in her Princess Leia bikini again may come true – The Superficial

If she thinks that hurts, wait until her mother takes her in for a bikini wax – TDW

A Tammy Lynn Michaels blog haiku from hell in 3..2… – Celebitchy

Arm porn: Jakey Gyllenhaal edition – Popsugar

Donald Trump wants you to think he has morals – ICYDK

Pizzapits!? Dude is going to be so disappointed when Kirstie Alley shows up – OMG Blog

Someone needs to hold a Flowbee against Brit Brit’s weave – Just Jared

The new house that Facebook bought – Moe Jackson

If you can wipe your own ass, you’re too old to be wearing a panda/wolf head scarf thing – Go Fug Yourself

Florence Welch is drunk – Cityrag

Joanna Krupa planned this – Hollywood Rag

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Another Day, Another…

January 14, 2011 / Posted by:

At this point, I should just start making posts about everyone who isn’t going to flood the streets of Hollywood with amniotic fluid in a few months. I swear, if Jennifer Aniston shows up with a bump full of baby, we should all quit this bitch and move to Hollywood to work as wet nurses and midgays. That’s where the real money will be at.

So, Alicia Silverstone and her husband of 5 years Christopher Jarecki (the dude dressed like Johnny Weir’s Kleenex above) announced to People that they are expecting their first vegan baby together later this year.

The first part of the year is turning out to be a blizzard of knocked up hos, which means that the end of 2011 will bring us a typhoon of BABY PICTURES!!!! Can’t they just all do a group cover picture of People Magazine in December? Do we really need a million covers of a celebrity touching cheeks with her baby while wearing all white? While I get a petition going, you can go through these pictures of Cher Horowitz making morning sickness face in L.A. yesterday.

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