The Hottest Homeless Dude in History

May 22, 2007 / Posted by:
Johnny Depp arrived to the premiere of "POTC3" in Tokyo looking like a homeless man again. Who cares, he's still one of the hottest bitches around. I'd still eat a ham sammie out of his butt cheeks.
In other Depp news! He said that kissing Keira Knightley was "awkward" because she smells. No, because she's so much younger than him.
He said, "The smooches are always so awkward, especially because Keira and I have never been in that kind of situation together. She's, like, three and I'm a thousand! We've known each other for a few years and suddenly it was, 'Are you ready for this?' And you just do it. It becomes more like a stunt in a way. She was a great sport about it."
Bitch looks hot for a thousand and Keira looks beat down and used for being 3.  

Break Breakdown

May 22, 2007 / Posted by:

Lady Sovereign had ANOTHER breakdown onstage on Friday night where she turned up an hour late. Before she even starts her song she talks about how she’s broke and going to be evicted from her apartment. She then calls some dude in the audience a “cunt” and continues to ramble on about how she hates America. Lovely, especially since you’re performing in AMERICA! She then runs offstage like a cry baby.

These people have it so hard and I think Angelina Jolie should start a charity to help them. Their lives are so hard. Erase Lady Sovereign and bring on someone that’s actually grateful. NEXT!

VIA Holy Moly!

“Help Me”

May 22, 2007 / Posted by:
Awww! Tom and Suri Cruise almost look like a normal daughter and father and then you realize the crazy that lurks below. Tom played with Suri while on the set of Katie Holmes' new movie. I love the look on the dude's face in the third picture. He has that "you better have my money" look. He's totally blackmailing Tom!
Anyways, Suri is a doll. No, she's literally a doll. 
Source: TC Forever

Take Ten Years Off

May 22, 2007 / Posted by:
Angelina Jolie will take a year off from making movies to spend time with her family. Angie told reporters in Cannes that she will take time off after completing her current movie.
She said, "I'm working this summer. I'm in Prague for a few months, then I take two months off, then I work for two months. And then I take a year off." 
Take ten! Go ahead live a little,  Angie. Actually, it's Brad Pitt that needs the time off. Homegirl needs like a 25-day nap followed by a deep tissue massage. He looks used and overworked. Angie's hypnotic vagina is finally taking its toll on him!
Brangelina and company will stay in Cannes for a few more days when Brad will walk the carpet for Ocean's 45 or whatever they are up to now.
Source: People

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