Harry Hamlin (65)
Danell Leyva (25)
Nastia Liukin (27)
Ashley Graham (29)
Janel Parrish (28)
Eva Marcille (32)
Clémence Poésy (34)
Ivanka Trump (35)
Matthew Morrison (38)
Gretchen Rossi (38)
Adam Edge Copeland (43)
Ben Bailey (46)
Nia Long (46)
Mark Polish (46)
Michael Polish (46)
Gavin Rossdale (51)
Michael Beach (53)
Kevin Pollack (59)
Juliet Stevenson (60)
Mario Testino (62)
Henry Winkler (71)
Grace Slick (77)

Pic: Warner Bros.

Because everyone and their weekend drug dealer is going to probably do an election-themed costume for Halloween, Katy Perry and her naked paddleboard driver Orlando Bloom did themselves up in election-themed costumes for Kate Hudson’s Halloween party in L.A. last night. It’s not surprising that they did election-themed costumes, but it is surprising that Katy didn’t do herself up as a pussy and Orlando didn’t do himself up as Donald Trump’s tiny elf-sized grabbing hand.

Katy Perry has been working the trail for Hillary Clinton, and last night she showed her undying devotion to #ImWithHer by dragging it up as Her. Katy’s friend went as the Bill Clinton to her Hillary Clinton and Orlando went as a Troll Doll Trump. They obviously went all out, but if it wasn’t for that MAGA cap and Bill wearing that “I’m With Her” button, I would not have guessed who they’re supposed to be. Katy Perry isn’t giving me HRC at all. What she is giving me is “bloated love child of a rubber Angela Lansbury mask and a jolly gnome,” as well as Jay Leno in sloppy Tina Brown drag. And Orlando Bloom looks more like an electrocuted Carrot Top (no offense to my muscled-up American ginger dream boat Carrot Top).

And for the sake of the other guests at the party, I hope Kate Hudson had a spread of every kind of drug at the bar, because I would need to do them all to rid my brain of the image of seeing “Hillary Clinton” and “Troll Doll Trump” tongue kiss in the corner.

Here’s more of Katy’s HRC costume as well as pics of other tricks at the party like Pussy Posse (or as they’re now known as “The Wolf Pack”) leader Leonardo DiCatchAHo playing it subtle by wearing a wolf mask.

Pics: Splash

On Thursday everyone was stunned when it was announced that Mariah Carey’s upcoming nuptials to billionaire gargoyle James Packer had been taken out back and put down for good. Actually, nobody was stunned at all, but who could have guessed what would come in the aftermath just a few days later? Continue reading

Nothing brings out the pre-school antics of humanity like a good ol’ hip hop beef, even though most beef these days tastes like discounted grey colored ground chuck from the dollar store. Today’s steaming pile of manufactured drama is brought to you courtesy of the Champagne Papi Drake and Kid Cudi. You will, of course, remember how the two of these opposite ends of the high school clique spectrum mu’fuckas have been going back and forth for a while now. Continue reading

Greetings!

My name is Ben and I am now your designated weekend tour guide through the fabulous world of celebrity fuckery, basic bitch battles and moments that will make your eyes roll into the back of your head so hard you’ll be able to see your own brain!

Pleasure to meet you. Now let’s get started.

In recent ‘Please Love Us Again!’ news the members of Destiny’s Child have launched their very first Instagram page! Even though these heifers haven’t produced a hit together in what seems like fifty years (the group disbanded back in the pre-iPhone Stone Age of 2005) the presence of their new Instagram account is causing fits of throwback nostalgia for everyone who remembers the time when Beyonce’ traveled exclusively with her two favorite backup singers and terrorized  the charts with timeless wasted-at-karaoke-night anthems like ‘Bootylicious’, ‘Survivor’ and ‘Soldier’.   Continue reading

Pictured: Not the new guest writers. Bloggers don’t leave their houses, let alone get dressed up to go to some Halloween shit!

J. Harvey used to be the foolery producer who would step in anytime Allison or I were out, but since he moved to weekends permanently, I put out a call about a month ago for new guest writers. Strangely enough, I found two people who are crazy enough to want to be associated with Dlisted and will help out whenever any of us go on vacation or call in sick (of writing about the lasagna-ruining Kartrashian- Jenners and Trump). Ben and Penelope are our new guest writers!

J. Harvey is out this weekend and so Ben is helping out today and Penelope is helping out tomorrow. Ben will mostly cover weekends. Allison will be out on Halloween (MUST BE NICE!) and is also taking a week off in November for vacation. Penelope will fill in for Allison on those days…unless after one day of working with me, she deletes her e-mail account, deactivates her phone, trashes her laptop and runs off screaming into the hills. That’s possible. And it may take a second or two for Ben and Penelope to get the hang of shit and get comfortable, so please be gentle. Although, you don’t have to be gentle with me. You know I like it rough and mean.

And now here’s pictures from Bette Midler’s annual Hulaween Bash in NYC. Bette made the bitches screaming for that long-awaited Hocus Pocus sequel scream louder by dressing up as Winifred. And next to Bette is Paula Jones as Madonna. No, it’s Marc Jacobs, who I’m guessing dressed as Paula Jones as Madonna.

Pics: Wenn.com, Splash