The Life

September 22, 2007 / Posted by:
 
Knocked up Nicole Richie is currently resting and relaxing in Hawaii with Joel Madden. Resting and relaxing from what I'm not sure, but she's doing it.
 
She doesn't look knocked up to me. She looks like she just had a huge meal at Applebees and not from the Weight Watchers menu either. Mmm….Applebees…..mmm…triple chocolate meltdown….
 
Anyway! Rest up Nicole! Yeah, rest up from resting up!
 
 
 
 
 


 
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That’s A Relief!

September 22, 2007 / Posted by:
 
Imagine Charlotte Church giving birth? Bitch's screams probably peeled the paint right off the walls. Ugh and I bet you she had massive meat farts during birth. Meat farts are when your gas smells like steak! Delicious.
 
Anyway, Charlotte finally popped one out yesterday morning. She gave birth to a baby girl weighing in at almost 7lbs. It has been reported that Char used a birthing pool as well as the assistance of two midwives. She gave birth at her farm in Wales.  
 
This is her first child with boyfriend Gavin Henson.
 
The baby girl's name has not been announced, but Char has said in the past she would name her Ava.
 
I feel less bloated knowing she's finally given birth. She looked like the Goodyear Blimp! Congrats to Char and I can't wait for the annoying comments from her that will surely follow!  
 
 
 
 
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But Is The Beard Ok?

September 22, 2007 / Posted by:
 
In case you haven't heard, George Clooney busted his ass in a motorcycle accident yesterday afternoon in NYC. Ok he didn't bust his ass, but he busted his rib. Clooney and his girlfriend, Sarah Larson, were injured when his bike hit another car on a road across the Hudson River.
 
Clooney was treated for a broken rib and scrapes while Sarah was treated for a broken foot at Palisades Medical Center in North Bergen. They were released later yesterday.
 
His spokeswhore issued this statement, "He's doing fine. He has a broken rib, it's very painful and it'll take a long time to heal." 
 
The accident is currently being investigated.
 
Clooney is in town filming "Burn After Reading" with Brad Pitt and Frances McDormand. His recovery will not affect production.
 
Georgie, while your beard is recovering you're going to need a good nurse. While I don't have the technical skills required to be a proper medical nurse, I have mastered the only skill that is truly required: ass to mouth. 
 
Get better Georgie and take care of that beard!
 
 
 
 
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