White Oprah’s Dreams Are Coming True

June 4, 2007 / Posted by:
White Oprah is currently in talks for her own TV show. Now it may not be the talk show she's dreamed about, but at least she will be on TV and that's what the mother-of-the-year wants. WO is talking with E! about her own reality show called "Mom-Ager." The show will follow WO as she tries to turn Ali and Cody Lohan into stars like their big sister, Lindsay.
A source close to WO said, "Can you believe that? She totally messed up Lindsay by making her a 'star' and living vicariously through her – and now she's going to do the same to the other two? How the [bleep] can E! do this? Those kids should be in school having normal lives, the life that Lindsay didn't get to have."
WO is too much! She would sell both those kids to extend her 15-minutes! I'm sure she's "in talks" right now with one of the entertainment TV shows to bring cameras into Lindsay's rehab! Bitch just doesn't give a fuck!
That being said, I'd probably watch this mess of a reality show. That's the problem. I'm helping in making White Oprah's dreams come true by buying into her crap! 
Source: Page Six – Image: Splash


June 4, 2007 / Posted by:
Dear Brit Brit,
Hi girl. How y'all doing? Listen, I know you think you have a "truly awesome radical cool sexy hot yummy" body, but it's jut not there yet. I mean I spoke with your ass cheek's cousin yesterday and they seem to think that your ass cheeks aren't loving the thong. I mean…..Brit…..I'm all for loving your body, but you can only love it when it loves itself. I don't think your body is quite at that "loving" place yet. Well, not your ass cheeks anyway!
xoxoxMichael K
PS – While you're in Puerto Vallarta pick me up some Vicodin and pick yourself up some Hoodia! Oh and get those Bo Derek from 10 braids, because that weave needs to go!
Source: The Sun

Posh VS Cam

June 4, 2007 / Posted by:
Posh Beckham and Cameron Diaz showed up to the MTV Movie Awards yesterday in the same pair of silver heels. Yeah I know, lame, but The Daily Mail made a thing about it.
Posh was welcomed by the audience as she presented with Chris Tucker. Cameron made sure to steer clear from her arch rival Jessica Biel. That's because bitch knew not to mess with She-Hulk!
Posh is honestly the tranny version of Siegfried and Roy! 

Wonky Upstages Everyone At MTV Movie Awards

June 4, 2007 / Posted by:
Just hours before checking herself into the clink, Paris Hilton showed up to the MTV Movie Awards. She walked the carpet and stuck around for a bit before heading home and getting ready for the pokey. 
Host Sarah Silverman was the first to crack jokes about Paris saying the bars of her cell would be painted like penises to make her feel more comfortable. They scanned to Parasite and she wasn't smiling. Awww….poor sport!

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