Wait, didn’t Drake just lean against Nicki Minaj in an Instagram post which means they’re together? Who’s this Jennifer Lopez chick?
Assured celebrity truth source In Touch reports that sweater rapper and Breezy enthusiast Drake, 30, might be too childish for newly revealed underboob activist JLo, 47, to continue dating. If they’re even actually dating. They’re seemingly together on social media. Which usually means that this is a big PR stunt to push tv and music projects and upcoming Las Vegas stints.
None of us are new here, “Dray-Lo!” (“Jake?“)
National treasure and Trump supporter irritant, Patton Oswalt, suddenly and tragically lost his wife, Michelle McNamara, in April of last year.
Patton found Michelle, 46, a true-crime writer and mother to their seven-year-old daughter, Alice (*sad-face*), unresponsive when he went to wake her up one morning. At the time, he publicly stated that he believed she might have taken an accidental overdose of prescription medication. It turns out he was half-right.
Like many of you, I too watched that footage from the set of A Dog’s Purpose and thought, “the Trump administration is making movies now?”
The film was poorly reviewed, and Dennis Quaid briefly considered returning to the arms of Meg Ryan for solace (I’m not sure he could recognize her to find her), and everybody wants to use robot dogs on film sets from now on. Or cats (I kid!). It turns out that what we were all watching wasn’t what we thought it was.
At least the American Humane Association thinks so.
Every koala bear in Australia spit out the eucalyptus leaves that they were contentedly chewing on to side-eye America this week. This was due to our despot-in-chief exhibiting his usual diplomatic finesse in a phone call with Australian prime minister, Malcolm Turnbull.
President Donald Trump reportedly abruptly ended the call with pretty much a “g’day, bitch!” after Malcolm had the audacity to ask if the US was going to honor an agreement that had already been made by the Obama administration to accept refugees. He’s also said to have told Malcolm that their exchange was “the worst call by far” he had taken that day.
was is one of the US’ staunchest allies, so this was another sterling moment in President number 45’s repping of us to the rest of the world.
The pussy who is not about to let anyone get between them and their dollar!
A wise philosopher once wrote, “I’m all right, Jack, keep your hands off of my stack.” The wise cat in this thrilling video obviously co-signs that line a million times over. The human of this money grubbing pussy (“A money grubbing pussy, you say? Are they looking for representation?” – Pimp Mama Kris) recorded a video of her trying to snatch a dollar from that cat. That cat should probably have their dollar in a bank, but I guess pussy believes that nobody protects their money like the Bank Of These Fists (or Bank Of These Paws, in this case). Instead of purring for the police to arrest that thief, the cat handles the situation themselves. Catch these paws, thief! (Tip: stop watching at the 0:24 mark.)
Ain’t nothing gonna get between that pussy and their money. Okay, maybe a laser pointer would. And catnip… and a rabbit head… and cardboard. Yes, that pussy is frugal, but pussy is smart. That cat probably has a stack of dollars under their litter box, and is saving for the day when they can bust out of this bitch and buy a one-way ticket to the dog-free and almost human-free wonderland that is Cat Island!
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