Well, Well, Well it looks like the cast of Saved by Bell hanging out thirty years later is exactly what we thought it would look like: Zack Morris, Kelly Kapowski, Jessie Spano and AC Slater all together with their hot new wives and husbands acting like the the wit and wisdom of Mr. Belding never even happened.
Because all actions have an equal and opposite reaction, Avengers: End Game–with all of its stars and high-budget action and three-hour plot and huge excitement and buzz surrounding it–has seemed to have created a vortex of negative energy which has been filled by this announcement. DMX, Tara Reid, Michael Madsen and Jake Busey are going to be in a movie together. I mean… I wonder if it will be called Assvengers: These People Still Do Things?
Roseanne Barr claims that not only did she put the bomp in the bomp bah bomp bah bomp, she also put the Q in LGBTQ. And while the jury is still out on who put the ram in the rama lama ding dong, Roseanne is definitely responsible for putting the long, heavy sigh in my “this bitch again?”. Roseanne put down the live fish she’d been chomping on and popped her head out from under her bridge to complain about not being able to use the word “fag” in public. In a video titled “The word ‘fag’ is h8ful-I put the Q in LGBTQ”, Roseanne questioned why she can’t use the word, in public at least, especially considering she’s “as queer as two mother fuckers”. I’m sorry, qwat?
In a move that should shock nobody with even the littlest ounce of mental and physical awareness, Nicolas Cage‘s wife of four days, Erika Koike, is going after his money. Yes, they were only married for 96 hours before Nic decided to pull the plug, but those were magical and all the time before that counts and she has become accustomed to a certain lifestyle and now she needs his money to maintain it so there!
LeAnn Rimes posted a picture on Instagram with her husband, Eddie Cibrian, Eddie’s ex wife and sworn enemy Brandi Glanville and Eddie and Brandi’s two kids. LeAnn called the picture their awkward family Easter, which of course it’s awkward. For years Brandi and LeAnn have fought harder than two people at a buffet with one crab leg left.
While sitting on a coach opposite Ellen DeGeneres with a giant screen behind her showing pictures of her kids, Pink vowed not to show pictures of her kids anymore. That part of her life is over, done, finito, completo, it’s canceled. She’s Dana Carvey as George H.W. Bush “not gonna do it, not at this juncture” about it. Pink is tired of people on social media “going in on her” for her parenting choices. So if you want to pick apart Pink’s mothering skills, you better do it at your leisure because she hasn’t gone the extra step to remove any of the pictures or videos she’s already posted. The infamous “pelican picture” that she caught so much flack for is still up there, though she’s turned off the comments on that one. But everything else is free game!