I’m sure we all just heard the sound of Ross Geller whining “We were on a break!”
I’m almost positive that when you decide to become a famous person, you’re delivered a gift basket containing the card of a divorce lawyer and a coupon for 20% off your first divorce. First marriages just don’t seem to last in Hollywood. David Schwimmer might be finding that out. 50-year-old David and his 31-year-old artist wife of almost seven years Zoe Buckman announced in a statement to UsWeekly that they’re separating.
“It is with great love, respect and friendship that we have decided to take some time apart while we determine the future of our relationship. Our priority is, of course, our daughter’s happiness and well being during this challenging time, and so we ask for your support and respect for our privacy as we continue to raise her together and navigate this new chapter for our family.”
David and Zoe have a 5-year-old daughter named Cleo.
Based on my knowledge of 50-year-old rich dudes coming out of their first marriage, David is a prime candidate for a mid-life crisis rebound. Zoe was 22 when they got together. That means if David rebounds with someone younger, which 99.8% of rich dudes tend to do, he’s looking at the 19-21 bracket. I just pictured a 50-year-old David getting dragged to Coachella by someone whose style icon is Kylie Jenner and who only knows Friends from Netflix. Oh boy, good luck with that, Ross.
It’s not exactly a secret that for the past two decades, Melanie Griffith has been working a pretty un-Melanie mug. That pic above is from 1999. Melanie says she realized that something was up with her face after hearing about six million “Uh Melanie? I think your face is melting” jokes.
Payless’ Dyeable Satin Shoes!
Note: That picture above is not a picture of the Payless dyeable heel from the 80s and 90s that I remember, but it’ll have to do. It’s actually a picture of a Lela Rose dyeable heel that Payless sold in 2010.
Pharrell Williams (44)
Lily James (28)
Marshall Allman (33)
Hayley Atwell (35)
Zak Bagans (40)
Juicy J (42)
Elodie Bouchez (44)
Krista Allen (46)
Thea Gill (47)
Paula Cole (49)
Mike McCready (51)
Christopher “Kid” Reid (53)
Agnetha Fältskog (67)
Colin Powell (80)
Roger Corman (91)
Christopher Hewitt (1921-2001)
Gregory Peck (1916-2003)
Bette Davis (1908-1989)
Spencer Tracy (1900-1967)
POLICE BRUTALITY AND RACISM ARE OVER thanks to Pepsi and Kendull Jenner! I never trusted Pepsi anyway. Shashta would never, and not only because they don’t have the budget – Jezebel
And cleanse your palate with Lynda Carter doing the Wonder Woman spin – SOW
A-Rod and JLo’s relationship is really going at warp speed, because they’re at the point where he’s taking her to business meetings to get her take and advice on opportunities. Well, it looks like stupid ass A-Rod didn’t follow JLo’s first piece of advice, which is when going to a business meeting always dress like an extra in a Deee-Lite video – Lainey Gossip
Bella Hadid looks like she’s modeling ensembles from Merry Go Round’s archive closet – Drunken Stepfather
Alexander Skarsgard thinks that playing a wife-beating rapist monster ruined his future as a leading man – Celebitchy
Somebody gave Yolanda Hadid the title of Mother of the Year – Reality Tea
Bob Harper says that the full cardiac arrest he had at the gym nearly caused the Grim Reaper to visit him – Towleroad
I know I should probably write a dozen words about Kaley Cuoco’s nipples, but I’m too busy reminiscing about the days when she and Superman did hilarious photo-ops at the grocery store – (site NSFW) The Nip Slip
If Anne Geddes shot for Playboy, she’d probably shoot something like this picture of Arianny Celeste wearing flower petal pasties – Hollywood Tuna
Spike did a documentary about Heath Ledger – Pajiba
My new kink of choice is watching Scott Wolf say “moist” – OMG Blog
Lindsey Morgan may or may not be the new Batgirl – Popoholic
Jesse Eisenberg is a dad – Just Jared
Here’s Rande Gerber’s nipples, because why not? – Popsugar
Before Stepmom came out in December of 1998, there was a rumor that Susan Sarandon and Julia Roberts hated working with each other. Both Susan and Julia denied that they were feuding to Entertainment Weekly about a month before the film’s release. Julia called the rumor “boring” and a “yawn” and said she was actually hoping people would have started a better rumor, like that she and Susan were fucking each other. Almost twenty years later, the rumor can finally be throw out along with that a VHS copy of Stepmom that every basement seems to have.