Angelina Jolie Brought The Kids To The “Dumbo” Premiere

/ March 12, 2019

For the Jolie-Pitts, nothing puts the “f”s in “family fun” quite like “forced foto-ops” on the red carpet for a kids movie with mom. Angelina Jolie unplugged the X-Box mid-Fortnite Battle Royale and told all them kids to go put on their outside clothes for the Hollywood premiere of Tim Burton’s Dumbo. Here’s the twist: They had fun.

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JLo Reportedly Doesn’t Believe That A-Rod Is Cheating On Her

/ March 12, 2019

While malevolent forces are really out here trying to sour Jennifer Lopez‘s recent engagement to former baseball player, Alex Rodriguez, she is not going to let them. Yes, Jennifer has seen all of the (incredibly fast appearing) cheating rumors which began spreading from Jose Canseco‘s Twitter account and has now begun taking new life. And she apparently doesn’t care.

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Lynette Scavo And Aunt Becky Got Busted In A College Admissions Scheme

/ March 12, 2019

March, 12, 2019: The day that the definition of random was redefined with a story about a college admissions ESCANDALO involving Lynette Scavo (real name: Felicity Huffman) and Aunt Becky (real name: Lori Loughlin). This Desperate Housewives/Full House crossover where Lynette Scavo and Aunt Becky share a jail cell after getting taken away from their homes in handcuffs for allegedly paying bribes to get their children into college IS the weirdest reboot ever.

NBC News says that Felicity and Lori are among 40 who were indicted in a college entrance exam cheating scheme. They were both charged with conspiracy to commit mail fraud and honest services fraud. Cut to Aunt Becky’s TV husband Uncle Jesse letting out a “HAVE MERCY!” over having to bail her alleged cheating ass out.

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Aaron Carter Is Defending Michael Jackson Against “Leaving Neverland” Accusers

/ March 12, 2019

TMZ is reporting that Aaron Carter is ready to punch someone in the face. Who is the target of Aaron’s aggression? We know it’s not Justin Bieber since he gave Aaron props for paving the musical path for semi-rhythmic white boys all across the world. Aaron is mad at Wade Robson and all the people involved in Leaving Neverland whom he views are slandering Michael Jackson‘s otherwise pristine name.

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Hot Slut Of The Day!

/ March 12, 2019

If Hollywood did a reboot of Snow White that featured an evil queen who wasn’t at all evil, and was just a sweet, beautiful dove trying to connect with his reflection in the mirror, it would probably make ten zillion dollars. It would also star Skippy the dove and his reflection.

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Birthday Sluts

/ March 12, 2019
Pete Doherty (40)
Elly Jackson (31)
Danny Jones (33)
Jaimie Alexander (35)
Holly Williams (38)
Dave Eggers (49)
Aaron Eckhart (51)
Julia Campbell (57)
Darryl Strawberry (57)
Courtney B. Vance (59)
Luenell (60)
Marlon Jackson (62)

Pic: Wenn.com

Lesley Manville (63)
Ron Jeremy (66)
James Taylor (71)
Mitt Romney (72)
Liza Minnelli (73)
Barbara Feldon (86)
Christina Grimmie (1994-2016)
Al Jarreau (1940-2017)
Billie “Buckwheat” Thomas (1931-1980)
Edward Albee (1928-2016)
Jack Kerouac (1922-1969)
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