“It” Shows That Terrifying Clowns Will Make Bank At The Box Office

September 10, 2017 / Posted by:

Just like Sarah Paulson’s shrieky character on American Horror Story Cult, everyone is scared of clowns. Also, we’re all masochists. This is why the film adaption of Stephen King’s million-page scary clown horror epic It cleaned up this weekend. Pennywise the Dancing Clown’s creep show smashed some box office records on the way to what looks like an opening weekend of more than $100 million according to Variety, Deadline and Box Office Mojo. Continue reading

John Mayer’s Penis Is Finally Woke Thanks To Nicki Minaj

September 10, 2017 / Posted by:

In a now infamous interview with Playboy back in 2010, easy listening goon John Mayer revealed that he didn’t have romantic relationships with women of color. His reason? It was because his David Duke cock is “sort of like a white supremacist.

Police interviews with prolific serial killers are less appalling. Luckily, John’s dick seems to have matured in the last seven years. Either that or he’s had most of the white broads in Hollywood and thought he’d try it with the black ladies. You would think most of these women would take a hard pass, but it looks like John has ONE fan in the female black celebrity community.

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Kim Kardashian Is Annoyed About Her Lack Of Privacy

September 10, 2017 / Posted by:

That’s like me being annoyed about Little Debbie sending me free samples. America’s New First Lady Kim Kardashian is reportedly expecting a third child via surrogate with husband Kanye West. Despite her and her Machiavellian mother probably having leaked the details themselves, Kim has the overly inflated buttcheeks balls to act all irritated about this REPREHENSIBLE invasion of her privacy. This is the woman who is doing everything but projecting footage of her sex tape onto her voluminous buttocks in the name of attention, publicity, and a quick buck ART and FASHUN. Now she wants privacy. Continue reading

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Birthday Sluts

September 10, 2017 / Posted by:

Kunty Karl Lagerfeld (84)
Sanjaya Malakar (28)
Coco Rocha (29)
Matthew Followill (33)
Misty Copeland (35)
Mikey Way (37)
Ryan Phillippe (43)
James Duval (45)
Johnathon Schaech (48)
Guy Ritchie (49)
Big Daddy Kane (49)
Colin Firth (57)
Chris Columbus (59)
Siobhan Fahey (59)
Kate Burton (60)
Amy Irving (64)
Joe Perry (67)
Bill O’Reilly (68)
José Feliciano (72)
Philip Baker Hall (86)

Pic: Instagram

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Open Post: Hosted By Tara Reid’s Latest Cinematic Triumph

September 9, 2017 / Posted by:

Taradise, we barely knew ye. It’s been so long since I’ve seen Meryl Streep successor Tara Reid here on Dlisted that I was beginning to worry about her. Had she quit the biz, and turned to her true calling – the drunk lady at table #15 at the Ruby Tuesday’s off the highway in Hackensack, NJ? No – she’s still kicking! Coming off her highly acclaimed work in the Sharknado quadrology, Tara immediately took a roll in future Criterion Classic Andy The Talking Hedgehog. That howling laughter you hear coming from Donnie Wahlberg’s house is Jenny McCarthy. (Luckily for her, she turned the role down.)

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