John Singleton’s Family Has Hired A P.I. To Investigate His Death

/ June 7, 2019

When John Singleton passed away in April at 51, it sounded like the cause of death was pretty cut and dry. John had checked into the hospital after suffering from a stroke during a flight from Costa Rica to Los Angeles. Then it was revealed he was put into a medically-induced coma, and not long after, he died. During all of that, his family was reportedly fighting with each other over his estate while he was on life support. There’s still some family drama, but this time it involves several people coming together to hire a private investigator who can help them figure out how the events unfolded as they did.

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Open Post: Hosted By The “Bound” Reunion We’ve All Been Waiting For

/ June 7, 2019

After Showgirls became a critical and commercial hit in 1995, and beat the record of the most Oscar wins ever (including Best Picture, Best Actress for Gina Gershon, Best Actor for Kyle MacLachlan, Best Supporting Actor for James The Cheating Slut Dancer, Best Supporting Actress for Mama, Best Costume Design, Best Original Screenplay, and Best Sound Mixing thanks to the moans in that dolphin seizure fuck scene)*, Gina Gershon had her pick of any role she wanted. Industry sources tell me* that Gina turned down the Frances McDormand role in Fargo and the Juliette Binoche role in The English Patient. So Frances and Juliette have Gina to thank for their Oscars!

But Gina followed-up Showgirls with another perfect masterpiece. Gina took on the role of clit-throbbing butchie lesbian ex-con goddess Corky, opposite Jennifer Tilly’s Violet, in Bound for The Wachowskis. That movie is so perfect and so hot that it temporarily turned me into a lesbian, which explains why my closet has a flannel I bought from 1996 in it. Gina and Jennifer reunited for an interview and photo shoot with Entertainment Not Weekly.

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R. Kelly Pleads Not Guilty To The Newest Sex Abuse Charges Against Him

/ June 7, 2019

That’s a picture of R. Kelly from a tour in 2016–I’m not being some kind of ominous troll by using it, I just chose it as the one to use randomly. R. Kelly has seen an influx of bad news on top of his already crap-stained human existence. He was hit with a ton more charges which carry sentences of up to 30 years in prison–which he’s now pleading not guilty to. And also his ex-manager has been charged for alleged death threats related to one of the girls allegedly brainwashed and sexually manipulated by R. Kelly.

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65-Year-Old Dennis Quaid Is Dating A 26-Year-Old PhD Student

/ June 7, 2019

65-year-old Dennis Quaid is getting with 26-year-old graduate student Laura Savoie. Yes, I did the math for you, that’s a 39 year age difference. Other fun math: Laura was born in 1993, graduated high school in 2011, she’s younger than Dennis’ oldest child (who is 27), and yet is still technically too old for Woody Allen.

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Drew Barrymore Is The New Spokesperson For A Tummy Sculpting Device

/ June 7, 2019

Leave it to industry vet Drew Barrymore to be able to pull off shilling for a fly-by-night health and beauty trend like EMSCULPT while still maintaining her hard-won brand ethos of empowered flower child. Drew’s managed to monetize her “latest obsession” which, as far as I can tell, is the modern equivalent of those goofy mid-century vibrating exercise belts/orgazmatrons. People calls EMSCULPT “a non-invasive, electromagnetic procedure to eliminate fat cells and tighten muscles”. Potato, potahto. Or if you’re Drew, “pothhhhhato, pothhhhhthato”.

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Brad Pitt Reportedly Wants Angelina Jolie To Sign The Divorce Papers Or Else!

/ June 7, 2019

Back in April, we learned that Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie’s never-ending messy divorce fight was almost over. They had legally became single, but weren’t officially divorced. We now have a singular, just one, update to that. Oh, who am I kidding? We’re in for more stories ,aren’t we? This one is about how Brad is trying to get the divorce moving so he’s giving Angie an “ultimatum”. Well, maybe their negotiations over money and assets will go better than the one over their kids? …I definitely don’t believe that but… I felt I needed to say it.

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