This Is Taylor Swift’s New Boyfriend®

May 16, 2017 / Posted by:

Yes, I’m sure Taylor Swift owns the trademark for “Taylor Swift’s New Boyfriend” and I’m also sure that anyone who uses it without her permission will see her in court!

It looks like Tay Tay’s PR Team has hit up Costco and filled their trunks with Red Bull, coffee and No-Doze (and meth if they were able to find a dealer in the parking lot), because they’re not going to be able to sleep now that her PR train is up and running again. Choo choo! Tay Tay is coming back!

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Kirsten Dunst Refused Sofia Coppola’s Suggestion To Lose Weight For Movie

May 16, 2017 / Posted by:

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There are so many tales of actresses being told by a director or an agent to replace their normal diet of food with low-calorie air before a film shoot in an attempt to lose weight. Kirsten Dunst is the latest to say that a director looked at her and thought, “I like it, but can I get it in an extra-small?

Kristen and her frequent director/friend Sofia Coppola recently spoke to Variety about their upcoming remake of The Beguiled, which is premiering at Cannes this month. I’ve never seen Kirsten Dunst on a scale, but I can imagine she probably clocks in at somewhere between thin-ish and normal. That must not have been what Sofia had in mind for the character of Edwina Dabney, and she asked Kirsten if she would lose some weight. Kirsten said no.

“It’s so much harder when you’re 35 and hate working out,” Dunst says. She even used the shoot’s location – in rural Louisiana- as an excuse. “I’m eating fried chicken and McDonald’s before work. So I’m like, ‘We have no options! I’m sorry I can’t lose weight for this role.'”

Kirsten says Sofia was “very understanding.” Considering they’re half-smiling together on the cover of a magazine, I’d say they’re still friends. Probably better, even. Something like that tests a friendship. Not the suggested weight-loss part – the part about fried chicken and McDonald’s. Imagine if Sofia had said that wasn’t a good enough excuse? Finding out who you thought was your friend has such little respect for fried chicken and McNuggets is a real true colors moment.

Pic: Yu Tsai/Variety

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Sandra Lee Hates Paul Ryan And Isn’t Afraid To Say It 

May 16, 2017 / Posted by:

A blank table, non-processed food and a bartender screaming “last call” are just a few things that Sandra Lee hates. You can now add “Paul Ryan” to that list. Sandra was doing a cooking segment on Fox & Friends last week and House Speaker Paul Ryan was also on the show. The rumor from Page Six went that Fox & Friends’ hosts asked Paul to stay for Sandra Lee’s cooking segment, but like Nicole Kidman and Giada’s focacca, she wanted nothing to do with him and shooed him away. A source said then that to Sandra, Paul Ryan is like a plain flour tortilla that hasn’t been covered with microwaved apricot jam, brie cheese and turkey lunch meat. He goes against everything she believes in.

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Open Post: Hosted By Penelope Cruz As Donatella Versace

May 16, 2017 / Posted by:

Ever since it was announced that Penelope Cruz will be trying to transform her Spanish accent into an Italian accent to play Donatella Versace in Ryan Murphy’s The Assassination of Gianni Versace: American Crime Story (which was called Versace: American Crime Story), I’ve been waiting to take in the sight of Penny in opulent fashion bitch drag. The paps took pictures of Penny as she strut to the set in Miami, FL yesterday, and well, I’m getting more “Penelope Cruz as Erika Jayne going to a funeral” than Donatella Versace.

The third season of ACS is set in the late-90s and so that was before Donatella checked into The Jim Henson Company’s studios and got them to transform her into the exquisitely-crafted rubber Muppet blossom she is today. So that’s why Penelope looks so basically boring and natural. Even though I really just see Penelope Cruz in a blond wig, I’m still not going to hate. It could’ve been ten times worse. It could’ve been Lady Gaga.

Pics: Backgrid

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Katharine McPhee Was Seen On A Date With David Foster

May 16, 2017 / Posted by:

That picture of Katharine McPhee and David Foster is old, but I’m using it because I love that it looks like a recently-divorced man and his gold-digging girlfriend who just quit her mall job. The reality is, of course, just a bit different; Katharine doesn’t work at the mall.

A source tells E! News says that 67-year-old David Foster and 33-year-old Katharine McPhee were seen on a romantic dinner date at Nobu in Malibu over the weekend and they treated fellow diners to some heavy-handed PDA.

“David and Katharine were very intimate during their dinner. David was seen grabbing Katharine’s face and kissing her cheek several times. Katharine was doing the same to David’s face and they were acting as if they were a couple. By the end of the date, Katharine sat on David’s side of the table and cuddled him with a blanket.”

Katharine was most recently linked to her Scorpion co-star Elyes Gabel, and before that she was allegedly with the married director of Smash. Since David’s split from Yolanda Foster, he’s been rumored to have been seen on dates with Selma Blair and Christie Brinkley. David Foster told Vanity Fair back in January that this is the first time in his adult life that he’s been single, and that someone told him he’s got to be very careful about who he chooses to be with for the rest of his life. It appears that David is just casually dating. If I were Katharine, I’d keep that in mind and make the most of the limited time they have. For their next date, she should suggest the most expensive restaurant outside of the US. She might as well get a trip out of it too.

Pic: Wenn.com

ABC Confirms They Made A Pact With The Devil By Announcing “Dancing With The Stars Junior” 

May 16, 2017 / Posted by:

ABC held its upfronts presentation (more like “upchuck presentation“) in NYC today and they announced all sorts of shit that’s got people asking, “Whyyyyyy?!” ABC confirmed that they’re dragging American Idol’s still cold body out if its grave next year. They also confirmed the Roseanne revival (the entire cast is back including Sarah Chalke who will play a different role) and they announced that they’re getting into the live musical game by doing The Little Mermaid Live this October (ABC’s offices should block Lindsay Lohan’s cell number because she’ll be burning up their phones now).

But the news that really made me cringe and also made all of the Pimp Mama Krises out there explode with glee is that ABC will air a kid version of Dancing with the Stars. ABC’s Dancing with the Stars Junior will pair child stars and the children of celebrities with junior pro dancers and they’ll do choreographed routines in front of a panel of judges. Every day we stray further from God’s light and get closer to HELL!

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