Birthday Sluts
Rod Stewart (63)
Cash Warren (29)
Lyle Menendez (40)
Trini Alvarado (41)
Julie Moran (46)
Evan Handler (47)
Shawn Colvin (52)
Pat Benatar (55)
James Lapine (59)
George Foreman (59)
Pammy’s Knocked Up! It’s An Epidemic!
Pamela Anderson is knocked up. Bitch can get in line, because I’m losing track on how many of these sluts are knocked up. Birth control anybody? TMZ reports that Pammy is going through with her divorce to Rick Soloman and she’s carrying his baby. Is he sure that’s his baby? He needs to call Maury.
Rick is telling people that Pammy’s acting crazy, because she’s knocked up and hopes she won’t go through with the divorce. They got married in October. Pammy wants spousal support, but not child support.
Great, another child Pammy can leave in the hotel room why she goes off to party and get plastered
I’m guessing Pammy is telling him she’s pregnant, so she can get more dough. She tends to play that game. She better ask Katie Holmes if she can borrow her fake baby bump.
Britmania
That’s exactly how my brains feel. Brit’s shitty ass absolutely everywhere. Although InTouch gave Jamie Lynn a bigger picture. You know Brit is probably shredding InTouch in anger.
I’m going to say that Star Magazine has won this bottle. The Brit pic they choose and the kids with the tagline “INSANE” is the right amount of trash and high art. I applaud People for using a 50-year-old picture of Britney looking normal, but that Britney hasn’t been around for a long ass time.
She’s probably creaming frapp juices knowing she’s on the cover of all the weeklies. I need a frapp just by looking at all this crap. Frapp with Jack…hold the frapp.
Star cover VIA Popbytes
Jamie Lynn InTouch
Tommy Girl Is A Hero!
Tommy Girl, Katie Holmes and his 3 kids were driving around their home in Telluride, CO recently when they noticed a woman stranded on the side of the snowy road. Tommy drove up in his Hummer (snicker) and immediately came to the woman’s rescue!
A source told InTouch, “The police were waiting with the woman for a tow truck and all of a sudden, a Hummer pulled up and it was Tom Cruise!”
Tommy then told Katie to push the car out of the snow. No, apparently he pushed the car out with the help of his bodyguard. That woman is brave. If I saw Tommy Girl’s crazy alien ass walking up to my car I’d probably hide under the backseat and call 911. He’s worse than those creatures in “The Hills Have Eyes.”
Brangelina’s Just Like Us!
UsWeekly has pics of Brangelina with their kids at Chuck E. Cheese in Springfield, Missouri. What the hell did Angie eat? She probably sniffed the breadsticks, because that shit is made of butter with a sprinkle of flour and that’s it.
A source said, “They like Springfield because no one ever bothers them.” Um…color me naive, but wouldn’t taking pictures of them constitute as them being “bothered?”
I would’ve loved to see Angie play skeeball. She probably tried to adopt one of those animatronic singing animals in the stage show.
I love Chuck E. Cheese, because I always try to pull Chuck E’s tail and no I ain’t being fresh!