Nicole’s Popped!

/ January 11, 2008

Nicole Richie has finally popped. She had a baby girl today at Cedars in Los Angeles. They have named her Harlow Winter Kate Madden and she weighed 6 lbs., 7 oz. LIES! Drop the pounds part and then we’re talking. 7 oz. is more like it.

No that picture isn’t of Nicole’s baby. It’s a month old picture. I’m sure Nicole’s baby is a lot smaller. A LOT. Like microscopic.

Their spokeswhore said, “The beautiful healthy baby girl left the hospital with her ecstatic parents.”

Congrats to Nicole, her douche boyfriend and their little Thumbelina. I’m not too sure about the Harlow name. It might grow on me. I’m guessing they named her after Jean Harlow. Harlow Winter sort of sound like a clown’s name. A sad clown’s name and sad clowns make me sad.

It was a busy day at Cedars. Not only did Richie pop, but so did Xtina (see below), Courtney Thorne-Smith and David Alan Grier’s wife. DAMN! You know it was smelly as hell in there. Vagina juices flying. Happy baby day!

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Xtina’s Popped

/ January 11, 2008

Life & Style reports that Xtina popped out a baby at Cedars earlier today in Los Angeles. Xtina was scheduled to have a c-section sometime this weekend. A neighbor of Bat Boy’s father confirms that she’s given birth. The neighbor said, “Of course! I talked to Jack earlier today. He’s so happy to be a grandfather. He’s thrilled to be a grandfather again, for the second time.”

Neighbors are so damn nosy with big mouths. No word on what kind of citrus fruit Xtina popped out, but we know that bitch’s baby is going to be orange. It was also reported earlier that she was having a boy. Poor boy is going to come out orange with a full face of make-up and bat wings.

I can’t wait to hear the name of this one. Bat Boy Jr. has a lovely ring to it.

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The Fug-List Is More Like It

/ January 11, 2008

When are editors of magazines going to realize that Keira Knightley fugs up covers! It’s a proven fact. Yes, she’s wearing a hideous denim bra, but somebody else could’ve pulled that off. KK looks she is on her last leg. Give the bitch some water. She looks thirsty. Thirsty I tell you. I also think they photoshopped her to look even more hollow. I didn’t think that was possible.

Above is KK on W Magazine and below is KK with James McAvoy on W for the subscribers.

Source: Fashion Spot

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Double The Fun

/ January 11, 2008

Nicole Richie is reportedly giving birth right now. Hahah! Can you stand it? For some reason I don’t know if I needed to know that. I picture her spread eagle and…ugh…

Joel Madden was overheard walking into the delivery area at Cedars in Los Angeles and saying, “She’s going to start pushing soon.” Pushing my ass! That bitch is having a c-section followed by a tummy tuck. I know how these bitches do it. Besides how hard can it be to push out a lima bean?

It also seems Nicole has some competition. It’s also being reported that Xtina’s at Cedars as well waiting to pop hers out. While Nicole’s popping a lima bean, Xtina will pop a little tangerine. That delivery room is going to look like a salad bar.

Source: UsWeekly

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